A little photo contemplation of ex-girlfriends and friendship, born again.
Yah, she was named after the Dynasty lady. A Naropa grad, an ex-girlfriend and born-again-friend, she’s back from Thailand, now living in Cali. She visited Boulder, last week, we went for a hike along Open Space and the historic irrigation ditch where Redford first learned how to swim, and then down to Eben G. Fine park, where, during the summer, a full dumpster’s worth of trash accumulates every single day. Maybe they should offer composting and recycling bins in a few more places, hey?
I’ve always prided myself on being friends, genuine friends, with ex-girlfriends. It’s tough. Sometimes, with all the rancor and disappointment and confusion, you need a break. But there’s a reason you got together, and stayed together for awhile in the first place, and it ain’t just xxx. It’s friendship. And if you excavate, after the house of your love affair has burned to the ground, you’ll often find a foundation of camaraderie. It’s almost better, usually, than when I was going out with them. Because now they know they don’t want to be with me, and I know I don’t have a chance, really, I know they’re onto me and my still-waters-don’t-run-deep ways.
All the possibilities of love and games and passion are put aside, and all that remains is two people, space, and the original connection of friendship. It’s almost monastic, it’s almost fantastic, but rather it’s just ordinary, and that, after all the bloodshed and drama, is such a relief.
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Waylon Lewis is the founder of elephantjournal.com
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July’s Full Moon in Capricorn: The Heart wants what it Wants. The 4 Stages of a Good Divorce. How to Love a Woman who Scares You. Our Soulmates are Rarely Who We Expect. I Still Think of You. Men, Let’s Stop Fooling Ourselves: Size Matters. To the One Who Tried to Break Me. An Open Letter to the Fixers. How your Stored Memories in the Amygdala can lead to PTSD. How My Sister’s Death Transformed my Self-Perception.