1) There are a lot of effin’ yoga teachers in the world and we are all “certified instructors” and “self-proclaimed” something or others.
2) Everyone who practices yoga seems to have something terribly un-yogi about them, and the revelation of this dark flaw makes us all terribly fascinating.
3) I am likely not the only mixed up whackadoo who enjoys watching Top Chef marathons while fantasizing about kale chips on Day Six of the Master Cleanse.
4) There exists an entire subculture of geeks who deconstruct the yoga sutras with the same hyper-intellectual zeal that my college debate teammates used to argue about Foucault while stuck in traffic on the way home from brutal competitions where we got our butts kicked. Just like back then, I find this super hot and this makes me a super dork.
5) Speaking of super hot, boys do yoga too.
6) I’m more inclined to click on posts with sexy titles than poetic titles, just like I automatically dig around for the globs of cookie dough in my So Delicious Coconut Milk ice cream.
7) I should probably start composting, listening to Lady Gaga, and grow up to be a Buddhist.
8 ) Yoga Journal cover models are the universal yogini metric for assessing our external imperfections so that we can proceed to accept them. Accepting our imperfections, that is. We don’t seem to like the Yoga Journal cover models at all.
9) Most everyone in the world is much cooler than I am, and by cooler I mean smarter, funnier, more mindful, and has been to India more times than I have. I know this because they all have websites where they artfully self-promote all they have to offer, and I lack.
10) Numbered posts and lists are quite popular. Thus my present use of the Top Ten format.
Jessie Clark is sometimes known as SriVidya, and is a recovering playwright and non-profit professional who currently resides in Denver, Colorado with her two dogs Siva Shambo and Sedona. Jessie is also a certified yoga teacher and self-proclaimed ashram junkie.