Are You Waiting or Creating?
Photo: Chrispy Bhagat Singh
Waiting for things to get better—are you waiting, or creating?
It’s a pretty typical concept or metaphor in asana practice that how you are on the mat is how you are in life—so, do you always wish you were back in bed, or back in the ‘good ole days’ when it was so much better? Or, are you the person who just can’t wait and spends a lot of your life wishing away the class just to be in Savasana, and in your life, wishing away Wednesdays and Thursdays, just waiting for the weekend, when it’ll all be so much better?
Interesting territory to experiment within the laboratory of self; and, the stakes are fairly low in the asana practice.
The worst that happens is we hurt our own feelings and dwell on stupid shit; best thing that happens is that we find ourselves and understand our own relation to the world and experience just a little better. But, are you waiting, or creating?
It’s tough work, there are no quick fixes, there are a lot of temptations to do the spiritual bypass and fall for the ‘I’ve forgiven them’ or ‘I’ve meditated on it and I’m good with it’; I suggest if you haven’t cried or been pissed off or depressed by it, then you haven’t dealt with it, you just stuffed it down under your invincible Brahmanic glowing light that you assume you should exhibit, because after all we’re yogis.
Well, you Yogis, we’re as messed up and frail and faulty as the rest of the folks just trying to make it every day.
A lot of folks fall for the illusion or live in the delusion that ‘we’re better’ because we are engaged in yoga. We’ll, as I like to paraphrase from a great teacher of mine, “If you like how your life is going, then stay away from yoga”. If you think it’ll fix you, it won’t. It’ll show you that you’ve been pretending you are not, that you are over, that you don’t want to see.
And, it gives you the tools to start working on it—it doesn’t make it better or you better; it helps you get better at knowing where you could do better. Slippery, I get it, but true. There is no quick fix, and for most of us who last past that second year, we understand that this is for the rest of our lives! That is a big responsibility; which is why we cannot beat ourselves up with our practice at this age since we’ll need the yoga so deeply in our end days.
So, I ask the question again—you’ve got ‘your teacher’, your cute clothes, your mat and your accessories and your perfectly arranged schedule, and sure, you’re showing up. But when it gets tight, tense, in those poses where you are triggered, when you hate the flow, when the teacher doesn’t know what they are doing—is that when you just retreat and go away?
What can you learn from that—again, in the low stakes laboratory of asana practice, can you take a look at who is makes those judgments, those choices, those bypasses.
Not that that’s bad, it’s what it is, not anything to dwell on—but to continue to just swallow it, or repack those bags, or accept those limitations is not going to make anything better. That’s the key—look at what you don’t like, be honest about it and own it and continue to process it. Don’t hide it under the light; don’t take the bypass and Namaste it out. Take the shadow, into the light—do the work, be kind to yourself and don’t ever expect to get better—make things around you better by being just a little bit better every day.
And, you’ve found the safe space and the skill set—so give thanks and praise!
Read more:
Sittin’ ‘Round the Campfire with my Yogis.
Banquets for Strangers, Scraps for the Beloved?
Conscious Activism (or how to completely disrupt your life & see what happens).
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Editor: Tanya L. Markul
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Chrispy (Bhagat Singh) is a yoga educator looking to shake the firmament and call down the stars in a holy-rollin’ tent revival Vinyasa experience that goes beyond and through the physical body and speaks to the subtly of Self… if you like how things are going, stay away---this is about changing perspective and experience! Learn more and connect with Chrispy on Facebook or RockStarYoga
Chrispy, thanks for sharing your wisdom. My process has been very different.
One thing i noticed is that you keep referring to the class or the teacher.
In my experience the real yoga happens when we are alone with the yoga mat – for hours.
Things do shift and they do change.
With daily, committed practice transformation happens.
No one said there were any quick fixes.
If you are looking for a quick fix, you don't do yoga.
You drink – - you get high on caffeine, you drug – blah blah blah.
Yoga, when practiced with deep meditative awareness will transform your life.
This type of practice is not for everyone.
One thing that's really helpful is to find a teacher that walks her talk.
It is possible to evolve. I am 100% certain of this.
When it happens it's very real.
Many people practice superficially and get superficial results.
Many people practice with diligence and fearlessness and evolve and change.
The quality of the practice determines the outcome.
You make some good points, but all in all your post seems very one sided.
My job as a yoga teacher is to share the other side.
I'm not sure what this means
Well, you, Yogis, we’re as messed up and frail and faulty as the rest of the folks just trying to make it every day.
To be a yogi is to practice moderation in thought, word and deed.
I don't see the average person living like this.
It takes many years of practice to get to this place.
To say it's impossible is ludicrous and defeats the purpose of yoga.
I get what you are saying about this being a lifelong practice.
Hopefully we are always improving – - and I agree that we never really arrive.
We have slips – we regress – - but it is progress just the same.
However, I think the purpose of yoga is to no longer be a victim to circumstances or
to the huge highs and lows that most people accept as inevitable.
As a yogi, to say those highs and lows are inevitable is ludicrous.
It is quite possible to live totally in the present moment and be OK.
I find this very sad: do the work, be kind to yourself and don’t ever expect to get better.
Don't every expect to get better? That is a self fulfilling prophecy.
I can tell you right now – if you don't expect to get better – - you won't.
Love yourself and believe in yourself and you will get better!
I love David Wolfe's standard affirmation of life.
"I'm having the best day ever!"
Misery is a choice although initially it does not feel that way.
You can stay addicted to your misery or you can wake up!
One cannot "achieve" yoga, the true practice of yoga surrenders the "doer"with "choice-less" witness consciousness,.Yoga is beyond moderation or excess, good or bad, right or wrong, yoga does not exist in duality, it is a non- separative flowing attunement with reality as it shows up moment by moment. One cannot begin the practice of yoga without acceptance and compassion for self as a foundation for objective self observation.
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Great post! Its when the going gets tough the real work and growth begin. I can practice yoga all day long when I'm happy. Its those times when I'm tired, depressed, anxious, etc., when the practice gets really interesting!
Don't people get bone tired of getting advice and "you should be THIS way not THAT way" posts from people who supposedly know? The old saying "those can't do, teach" applies here. Chris is just an example of "what you say is what you are." So there.
Hey, Chad!
Yup, you outed me, I'm the first to admit I'm frail, and faulty, and just trying to make it every day.
I don't speak the TRUTH, but rather my truths, that I've discovered in the practice, and in teaching.
Because I want to be a better student, I am a teacher – because I want to be a better teacher, I'm a student!
I don't tell anyone to be this way or that way, I speak about experience and method, and let folks apply that as they may. So, I'm sorry if the post read poorly to you, but I'm already humbled by the practice, so you can lay off!!
Give thanks and praise, you found discernment! It's really important and healthy to know what you don't like!
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Great article! I really like this because I'm currently uncovering some layers of shame, guilt, and other emotional dirt I have swept under the rug. After reading some books on healing shame and "Chants of a Lifetime" by Krishna Das I feel a lot of us have to work on our self-worth as well as the asanas as KD also points out. Many of us in the West aren't as open and caring as other cultures and/or families. I also say this coming from a family that has dealt with shame related alcoholism, abandonment, family secrets and such. Sometimes we have to work on our own self-worth and those closest to us to open our hearts and really expand our yoga (and lives).