Five Signs of True Love.

Via on May 17, 2012
Photo: Chordboard

We all know the cliché of real love in our society.

Watch a movie, listen to a song, read a romance novel. They all give you the ooey gooey, rip your heart out, kind of love.

Those illusions are more speed bumps on the way to the real deal.

Sign number one: True love has no time limit.

Whether you meet and its kismet or a long, torturous on again/off again courtship, when the seeds of true love have been planted it can take its own sweet time to sprout.

Let me clarify:

Kismet aka destiny aka whatever you want to call it.

May not necessarily be instant chemical attraction, though it could rock your world.

It is rather a “knowing” feeling.

And even though you “know” and the other person knows, it doesn’t mean both parties are ready for “true love.”

And that brings me to the long, torturous, on again/off again courtship.

If it weren’t so prevalent, I wouldn’t mention it here.

Some who have met the love of their life can’t seem to get out of their own way and have checked into the lovesick wing of a virtual hospital.

Photo: Tomasz Sienicki

It’s time to heal and get out of this place.

Where old wounds keep festering; hearts broken into shards can’t pick up their pieces and everyone needs more nursing. It’s a place to be stuck in the past and congregate with others to tell their tales of woe.

True love leaves this person torn.

They cannot be fully open, present and vulnerable in a true love relationship, and they can’t let go either.

No one can let go. Or walk away for good.

We c’mon back like a rubberband on steroids.

One or both of us have an allergic reaction, so we must stay away from what feels good, happy and kind, because some day too this love will eat you alive.

And the two people on this path are in a cosmic collision.

Feels like karma, feels like there’s no choice, feels like you must be nuts.

Yup…it’s a lesson alright!

You see, I have found through my own experience and watching others in this dilemma, sometimes it’s about patience (not to be confused with waiting).

You receive a gift with the challenge of something so good, being so painful, because one person (or both) has their eyes turned to the past.

Patience whittles away inauthenticity and gives the gift of self-love, confidence and knowing oneself.

You embrace the awareness of sign number two: Your ego does not win.

When you meet someone with a soul, heart, intellectual, friendship, love connection, your ego may pull all its usual bullsh*t. In fact, count on it!

Until your ego is reminded over and over again that our purpose of being here is to love. And the beautiful messed up soul in front of you needs your love as much as your messed up self needs your love.

True love works its magic on your stance. It softens you allowing the flow of those feelings. You realize, yes this is pure, true love.

No matter if it is kismet or a long struggle, the ego does not get top billing in a relationship based in true love. And it does not guarantee the outcome.

Sign number three: You have a sense of humor, lightness, connection and goodness even when the shit hits the fan.

Photo: Galiel

It’s called true love, unconditional and even if you do decide to part ways, love is always there.

Sign number four: You can’t escape the synchronicity.

It is almost ridiculous!

Whether it’s the weird things you have in common or how you share the same breath or that your brothers are both named Bob or your similar perception of life.

How about finding out you crossed paths more than once years ago without knowing it?

Or on the flip side…

Everywhere you go their name like a neon sign or some impossible to ignore song or commercial has you tripping over yourself, scratching your head wondering, why can’t I escape this crazy fun house!

Don’t run or hide.

Give in, it’s easier.

Take it as a confirmation, that you’re in a good place.

Whether you are both feet looking into each other’s eyes or running in opposite directions, just know with synchronicity—it ain’t over ’til it’s over.

Lessons in life come from our own evolution.

You want to evolve?

Relationships are the perfect place for spiritual growth.

And when we try to bypass or cut short the lesson, surprise! We get to repeat it!

Who doesn’t love the torture of repeating patterns, trying to make sense of our choices, feelings about ourselves and what attracts us to these challenges?

True love is the glue to your heart binding you to your own potential soul growth. Awareness is the illuminator.

Whether you marry, live together or run off and join the circus, true love stays with you, because it just “is.”

Leading us to the last one, sign number five: You feel lucky.

You have been fortunate enough to meet someone to experience true love and connection. Whether it is for a day, year or the rest of your life, you feel as though this is what love stories should really be written about and that who you open and become through true love is the most authentic version of yourself.

What’s not to love?

 

Relephant bonus: you still have space for independence in your lives.

Like elephant love on Facebook.

~

Editor: Kate Bartolotta

About Tracy Crossley

Tracy Crossley is a hyphenate: female, writer, curiosity quencher, artist, poet, gardener of real gardens and existential ones, clairvoyant, and momma to grown ups. She is an intuitive mentor as her main gig. She is currently speaking, writing and mentoring people on love. And empowerment in relationships---all of them, personal and professional. If you want to learn more about her, please check out her main website, facebook page, blog and on twitter. If you really want to get some quality time with her, email her at Tracy AT tracycrossley dot com or apply for one of her FREE discovery sessions.

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11 Responses to “Five Signs of True Love.”

  1. Eric says:

    Na-MESS-sté: 'the mess in me bows to and honors the mess in you" :)

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  5. devamarga says:

    thank you for articulating my story, I feel comforted. I feel sad still, as I look at my attachment and proud that I am courageous .

  6. I LOVE this. It echoes my own looooooong draw out on again / on again relationship of 16 yrs with the father of my son. We have SO MUCH love for each other and sometimes think we need to let go, but cannot leave each other alone for more than 24 hrs. Too many articles these days say “if it doesn’t serve you, let it go”. But what isn’t serving you about coming face to face with the power struggle of the ego time and time again? We MUST see our shadow if we want to move through to the other side. I say OWN your feelings and be patient for true love will wait. xxx

    • Tracy says:

      I totally agree about owning our feelings, no one else can tell us what it is or why feel how we do. And I have yet to meet someone who can actually let go "emotionally" when they are told to do so. Thank you Holly! :)

  7. Barry says:

    Right on – for what I thought was late in life, I learned of this type of love, it resonates for me as a love of no expectation – even the expectation that you will be with that person – to have a strong love regardless and with no jealousy – this was powerful stuff – freeing, & beautiful when allowed to rest there instead of some zone of melancholy or pining – true love is so wowza :)

    • Tracy says:

      Hi Barry~ True love is so different from fairy tale love or jumping off a bridge love. True love is kinder, gentler and already a part of each of us once we remove our ego from the equation. :) Thank you for your comment. :)

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