It’s the Little Things that Matter.
In the wake of what seemed like a rather turbulent week out there, I find myself with no shortage of opportunities and, most importantly, reminders for continuing to turn my gaze inward toward greater and deeper self-reflection.
A quest for a deep relationship with the self lies at the heart of yoga practice.
In order for this to manifest, we undertake any number and types of practices which we hope, in the end, will lead us away from the constant fluctuations and distractions of the mind that keep us busy chasing after those things we think we need in order to find happiness and fulfillment.
I am so incredibly and laughably far away from this goal the only thing I can do is take shelter in my practices and embrace the opportunities the world and my experience of it provide for me to see my path a little more clearly.
I find one of my greatest stumbling blocks comes in the form of distraction.
I get so easily caught up in the world and spending hours a day on the internet writing and editing does not help in the least. It is just so darn convenient to click through the multiple tabs at the top of my browser. Jumping from email, to elephant journal, to Facebook, to Huffington Post and back to Facebook on my way to my email again.
I mean, seriously, how much could have possibly happened in the last five minutes? In reality, little to none. Furthermore, what tiny, tiny fraction of this information would actually deepen my practice of yoga? The answer, almost certainly, none, zilch, nada.
And yet, I can’t help myself sometimes.
What’s an aspiring yogi to do?
Well, there are probably as many answers as there are “askers,” but one of my solutions lies in using the examples, both good and bad, I find in my wanderings to shine a big ol’ bright spotlight back on yours truly. You know that old saying, “When you point a finger, you have three pointing back at you?” Well, more often than not, it’s true on some level.
So, if I find someone, or something, that gets under my skin, or causes me to think, “Boy, s/he’s sure missing the point,” I immediately catalogue it under, “Yeah, but how are you doing the same thing?”
Let’s take a look at my arch nemesis, distraction. Because, as it turns out, I’m not the only one out there struggling with a wandering “eye.”
Distraction for me boils down to “not paying attention to what really matters.” In yoga terms, one might understand this in relationship to avidya, or ignorance. Ignorance, according to Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra, is the root cause of our suffering. It is the King of the Kleshas (obstructions) in that the other blocks of attachment, aversion, ego and clinging to life find their origin in our inability to see what really matters. This makes sense since ignorance manifests as a confusion about reality in which we regard what is impermanent as permanent, what is impure as pure, what is painful as pleasurable and what is non-self with self.
In other words, we’re all mixed up about where and to what we should be turning our attention.
Three events this past week perfectly demonstrated this for me.
One was the shooting in Aurora.
No, it was not the event itself or even the national dialogue and mourning which took place that was the distraction. I think all of these things are important processes for us to undertake.
It was the focus on who got killed that I felt missed the point. In particular, the questions and “concerns” that were raised about why young children were in attendance at a midnight opening of Batman. Why is this any of our business? On what grounds do we feel we have access to the minds and hearts of these parents? Is it not possible that some outsiders could look upon some of our decisions with an up-raised brow of suspicion?
In the end, does it really matter why those children were there? No. Does it make their deaths any less tragic or unfortunate? No. Perhaps choosing to question their deaths as some sort of failing on the part of the parents is an all too convenient way to sidestep the elephant in the room, which is that when young people die we are confronted with the uncertain certainty of our own inevitable demise. Perhaps, it’s just easier and safer to ask, “what kind of parent…” rather than “what am I doing to prepare for my departure?”
Two was the scandalous admission by Kristen Stewart that she had in fact cheated on Robert Pattinson.
Now, I would not have even known about this “event” if not for stumbling upon the video confessional below during my morning perusal of Huffpo.
Now, I will admit that I laughed my way through this video upon my first viewing. I was downright giddy. And I guffawed with the best of them, “Oh please, get a life.” However, my judgement was short-lived when I paused and realized that Ms. Clark and myself differ not in kind, but simply in degrees.
Sure, I’m not obsessed with celebrities and their love lives, but I have my own afflictions. And I spend at least as much time as Ms. Clark bearing my soul to a wider anonymous internet audience. In all honesty, probably more. The difference here being that she reaches a lot more people than I do. So, which of us is the one caught up again?
Finally, there was the ongoing saga at the Penn State campus over the statue of Joe Paterno.
Growing up in Pennsylvania, I am familiar with the fervor and mystique that surrounds Penn State football with “JoePa” being the warm little center of the universe around which it all revolves. And when the Jerry Sandusky scandal broke and then the Freeh report was released, well, let’s just say I wasn’t surprised that morality and general decency were victims to legacies and on-field victories.
But, the division and reaction of the Penn State community has left me scratching my head. How can football be relevant to you at a time like this? How can you hold up your image of Paterno when it’s painfully obvious that he knowingly worked with and sheltered a known child molester? Why would you cling to a statue of a fallen angel?
It was amidst these questions that my worldly distractions bared their fruits in the form of Howard Bryant’s commentary, “Penn State Can Now Focus.”
While, on the surface, this piece is about Penn State and football, like all good writing it goes much deeper into our lives, our choices and the foundations we choose to build our lives upon. Bryant writes:
Without change of mindset, a view through the proper lens, something about the game and the aftermath will seem perverse, will feel like noise, as if we’ve learned nothing. If the public debate remains about wins, losses and legacies, about the power instead of the powerless, the victims will return to what they’ve always been: pawns in the power game — and that will be our greatest indictment.
And this takes us right to the heart of it. Where are our blind spots? What are we missing? How are we doing the exact same things in our lives?
Our mindset, our lens, the ways in which we choose to view and interact with the world surrounding us reveals more about our internal environment than the external world out there. If we are constantly finding ourselves caught in the allure of “the next greatest thing,” then we might begin to wonder, “What have I failed to appreciate about the focus and practice of yoga?”
Why am I constantly distracted by these endless going-ons, when the goal of yoga is to turn me towards a greater understanding of myself? Perhaps, these events serve a purpose of re-tooling our focus and our attention. Yoga after all does not require us to drop out of society and head for the hills. It is quite possible to have a successful, engaged life while remaining true to the principles and practices of yoga. But such a path is a knife’s edge and a dangerous walk.
In the end, we are better served by practice. However, practice is only half of the equation. The old adage, “Practice makes perfect,” is only partially true. “Practice makes perfect” only and exactly what it is that you spend your time practicing.
For those of us looking to yoga as the guide and goal of our lives this means a constant willingness to reflect, take account and when necessary re-adjust to make yoga once again the central focus of our being.
Incorrect source, offensive, or found a typo? Or do you want to write for Elephant?
If I didn't reflexively check my e-mail every three minutes I wouldn't have had the pleasure of reading your excellent article for, oh, maybe another three minutes: am here, doing that, buying the T-shirt. Thanks for giving me some impetus to turn this damn machine off for a while and go back to my harmonium.
Always happy to be of service. I've actually started playing myself a bit this past week. Wow…talk about a sweet, positive "escape."
Why are people so invested in JoePa and football? Or Stewart and Pattinson? Because, contrary to popular belief, idolatry did not end with the Golden Calf. As long as we keep thinking that there's something "out there" that we need to know/have/do/be, we'll be distracted by it. When we accept on faith that what we need will always find us (if it's not already within us), then we can remain one-pointed in our determination and focus.
Thank you for your comment Tulasi priya.
You'll get no argument from me about the never-ending nature of idolatry. It's obvious that there are no shortage of random things to which people will dedicate their lives.
However, I cannot get fully behind your solution without a small addition. And I will use myself as an example. On some level, e.g., theoretically, I know that my happiness does not lie "out there." However, I have not come to the point where I've sufficiently internalized, e.g., realized, this knowledge and so still find myself subject to distractions. This dynamic between theoretical and realized knowledge is at the heart of the piece and I think is what explains why very dedicated practitioners of yoga still find themselves occasionally caught up in things they "know" are not "good" for them.
And this is why a regulated sadhana is crucial, because it facilitates the transition of such individuals, myself included, towards a greater and deeper internalization of the yoga's wisdom and guidance away from the unreal towards the real.
Just intro'd on FB to: I'm Not Spiritual & Enlightened.
~Mamaste
Very well written. As I procrastinate writing. Distracted by an elephant. Thank you.
Thanks for reading. Darn elephants. Why they have to be so big and beautiful.
Love it! Going through a tough divorce and have been using all of these things to distract myself instead of fully experiencing my life. I was even contemplating distracting myself further by blogging about the distractions. You beat me to it – well done:)
Thanks Tracy, I'm glad you liked it.
It's interesting you were contemplating writing about distraction yourself. I often find that as I am about to sit down and write something that I find all sorts of examples where people are writing and reflecting on the very same thing. In fact, this is what precipitated this piece in the first place. It just must be something in the air of "universal consciousness."
I'm sure there is still plenty left to be said from your point of view, so I would love to read whatever you have to say as well.
Thoughtful piece. A steady, distraction-free mind, I find, comes out of following one's own enthusiasm – that is, genuine enthusiasm – which in ancient Greek meant possession by the divine, and I interpret the divine as the one Self. When I'm writing a poem, for instance, I am immersed in the process of writing and revision, for days and days. I'm calm, focused, and centered, as if I'm doing what I was born to do. It happens naturally, without any great force…more below
That's when one's real work begins, I think. It's tragic to think of people who, for whatever reason, miss the mark in life and spend the vast majority of their time doing work that is counter to their innate character, thus making them even more prone to distraction, misery, and other detours, more so than those of us who are confidently and consistently on the path towards our deepest Selves. But I am not insinuating that the path is a "spiritual path" or whatever. Religion and spirituality need not be involved, unless you want them to. Also, it is not my intention to insinuate that I am in any way better than, say, the young lady in that crazy video. I may be vastly more informed about myself, but better? No. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks Sunita for the comments.
I think you make a good point in stating that religion and spirituality need not be involved in this process. For me, they are essential since that is the path I've found which takes me where I want to go. For you, poetry seems to accomplish this. For others, I know that it is music. It really doesn't matter how we get there, as long as we are doing the work.
Excellent article! Your a great writer and I am hoping to look forward to more.
Thank you Mark. I'm glad you liked it. Currently, I am writing once a week. So, you'll have plenty of opportunities.
Oh Boy, That *walkabout* a lot of us do daily from FB to email to websites, is probably on its way to becoming a ritual with a name and the correct order along with the right and wrong way to do it. Waking up is really hard.
Yeah…seriously…although I'm surprised to hear that you start with FB and then go to email. That is so last year.
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oh, the things we distract ourselves with…. and writers are the worst! Does it count if you are distracting yourself with things like meditation and yoga practice? It seems no matter WHAT I am doing, it is taking time away from something else!! – Alexa M.
No, actually quite the opposite. Meditation and yoga practice are arguably the only things which aren't distractions.
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very nice, there is some balance, I am not sure what it it yet. I became so interested in reading, then commenting, and now I am calling myself a yogaawriter. I find that reading what others have to say and commenting on it helps me think through my own questions, beliefs and learnings.
I do get distracted with Huffpost.. and yet for ME, me only, I am getting tired of it and bet I am down to 2-3 articles per day if that.
thank you fo rthe honest look. I am glad I am nto the only one who has playe din this playground and found temptations which feel so.. "one click' luring to be only 2 minutes and then! TEN! gone!
pura vida cathy
Love this article. Very true to life and right on the button. It actually inspired me to write out a few thoughts of my own at my blog (http://longtimesunyoganyc.wordpress.com/2012/07/30/perception-is-reality/). That idea of how we perceive behavior in others that we also engage in ourselves has always been so fascinating to me. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks for contributing to the discussion @LongtimeSunYoga.
You raise so many good points about fault-finding, personal responsibility and defensiveness.
Fault-finding is like cancer to a spiritual yoga practice. It is insidious and it will eat you alive from the inside out. Of course, to avoid fault-finding requires us to accept radical personal responsibility, which is really hard. And yes, many of us are quick to become defensive and argumentative when confronted with this dynamic because, as you point out, it requires us to be courageous. Personally, some days I am better at this whole drama than others.
One thing I always try to do, aside from writing which is kind of anonymous, is to avoid giving unsolicited advice. Many people simply do not want to hear or think about such issues, which is fine. This is a good way to avoid encountering too much argumentation and defense.