10 Tips for Dealing With Haters. ~ Dolphina

Via on Aug 25, 2012

How to remain positive in the face of negative people.

I admit it. I am a devoted dreamer, annoyingly optimistic and possess an unrelenting aspiration to make a difference in the world.

To put it simply: I’m a lover, not a fighter.

Despite being a positive person with the goal to inspire others, I sometimes doubt myself because of the negative comments said about me.

“Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising, which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires courage.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

My beloved Emerson was being extremely generous when he called these people “critics”, the vitriol the online public espouses about me is brutal. Just this week, I’ve been told that I suck, have no talent whatsoever and have made people vomit (or want to). They’ve called me a New Age fruit loop, a belly dancing Barbie doll and actually claimed that I have single-handedly destroyed belly dance.

Reading negative comments written online does hurt me, but worse than injuring my feelings, their negativity has caused me to experience uncertainty about my mission in life. I want to empower other women. I desire to make all women—young or old, happy or depressed, rich or poor, heavy or skinny, white or brown—know that they are capable of doing anything. This is my raison d’être, my reason for being. Along this path, I do make a difference in the lives of some women. However, I get not everyone will love me. Certain people just want me to shut up, quit dancing and stop existing—these people are the unknown, faceless haters.

Those previously mentioned are simply the amateurs. Now, bring on the heavy hitters: family, friends and romances. When these loved ones tell me that my blog posts are idiotic, the costume I just designed is ugly, that if I pursue a creative endeavor I will make a total fool of myself or that making a business deal will result in irrefutable failure, mere doubts turn into paralyzing fear. These people have my best interests at heart, or so they tell me. They are not like the faceless online haters that most certainly want to see me fail, but pessimism can create a crack in any dream—no matter who the messenger may be.

Honestly, in the past (and not-so-distant past), these cynical comments and disapproving influences have caused me to want to pull the covers over my head, quit dancing, give up dreaming and stop daring. But I never have and never will, and neither should you.

Why?

Because our dreams make a difference and positively making a difference in a single person’s life matters so much more than trying to please negative people—especially if the life you are making a difference in is yours.

I know it’s not easy to take the bitter with the better, so here are some practical tips I’ve learned over the years to remain positive when dealing with negative people:

1. Wait a minute

Sometimes we feel compelled to instantly respond and defend ourselves. I’ve learned that emotionally charged emails never get me the result I want, they only add fuel to the fire. What is helpful, is inserting time to allow ourselves to relax. Writing a fake email is helpful for venting. After I have written the letter, I usually don’t have the desire to respond the same way.

2. Go for a walk

Walk, dance or do some other workout. Physical exercise is the answer to almost any problem. What could possibly bother us if we just danced to the song, “Born to be Wild?”

 3. Pour honey

We can get more bees with honey than we can with vinegar. I will compliment the people I come in contact with for being so helpful. I will try to make them laugh and bring some levity to the situation. Positivity is contagious, and with some honey everyone is sweeter.

 4. Focus on the positive

It is strange how we can receive 10 compliments, but it’s that one negative comment that we will remember most. We give the negative more power simply by focusing on it. Write down all the compliments you get during the day and post them where you can see them. Do whatever you have to do, but focus only on the positive.

5. Worst case scenario

I often ask myself, “What is the worst case scenario?” I know that the worst-case scenario usually does not occur, but the moment I utter aloud the nastiest situation possible, I remove that deep-rooted fear that I cannot handle the worst possible circumstances.

6. “Does it really matter if I am right?”

Sometimes we respond with the intention of defending ourselves just because we want to be right. In most situations, I know it matters very little whether I am right or not. Choose your battles wisely, is it really worth it?

7. What we feed grows

When I have a problem or a conflict in my life, I can always find someone to gossip with. But, what we feed grows, and it can grow out of control. So unless I am talking about it with the intention of finding a solution, I stop talking or even thinking about it.

8. Learn

No situation is ever lost if we can take away some lesson that will help us grow and become a better person. Regardless of how negative a scenario may appear, there is always a hidden gift in the form of a lesson.

9. Choose to eliminate negative people from your life

Negative people are like vampires. They suck the very life energy out of us. We should do our best to lift them up to our level, but if they are not willing, then we must cut them out by avoiding interactions with them as much as possible. If I absolutely cannot eliminate someone from my life, then I will try to at least keep them at a distance.

10. Surround yourself with people that believe in your dreams

It might be difficult to change the mind of your Aunt Edna or your childhood friends, but the great thing about being a grown-up is we can choose to surround ourselves with whoever we desire. That doesn’t mean our friends can’t ever give us helpful advice or even say “no” from time to time, but ultimately we should know in our hearts that they believe in our dreams.

Trust me when I tell you that the more you choose to live your dreams, be positive and inspire others—the more you will attract the same kindred spirits.

It turns out some of the people we thought were negative to the bone, just needed a little of our own personal brand of joie de vivre to turn their own melancholy into happiness.

There will always be those negative people trying to bring us down, but so what? What are they doing while we are putting our heart and soul out there?

If we stick our heads above the crowd, someone’s bound to throw a tomato. Remember that we have the choice to be surrounded by people who have the qualities we admire: optimistic, positive, peaceful and encouraging people. And whatever you do, don’t stop believing!

 

Dolphina is a mademoiselle with a mission to make a difference in our world one Goddess at a time. She founded her company, GoddessLife, with this premise, and has guided its growth into an international feminine force. A powerful teacher, dancer, author, activist, and businesswoman, Dolphina has overcome tremendous odds to create a company who’s sole purpose is to support and empower women.

 

 

 

 

 

~

Editor: Maja Despot

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51 Responses to “10 Tips for Dealing With Haters. ~ Dolphina”

  1. __MikeG__ says:

    So, anybody that disagrees with you is just a hater? You are always correct and anybody who doesn't realize that is just wrong?

    Jim Jones surrounded himself with persons who shared his dreams.

    But you can safely ignore the above because obviously I am just a hater. Right?

    I think you have a lot of positive to offer and for the most part the advice given in this article was good. This "hater" did enjoy the majority of this article. I think there is a lot I could learn from you and I will try to incorporate the good parts of advice given in this article into my life. But I do hope I never ignore valid criticism. Acknowledging when I am wrong is important also.

    Hugz.

    • Dolphina says:

      Thank you for reading & your comments. I do not have a problem with anyone who disagrees with me nor did I ever say that I am always correct. My article is about how to remain positive and not let the negative rob you of your dreams or making a difference in the world. Blessings, Dolphina

      • __MikeG__ says:

        I do believe I mentioned that I liked and was inspired by the article for the most part, didn't I? Interesting that you focused your response on what I viewed as the problem with the article.

        But I like you anyway. PeaceOut.

        • RobP says:

          Hi MikeG,

          That's an interesting twist on the exchange. You asked a clear question and Dolphina specifically addressed it. To imply that there was some agenda behind her doing that says more about the attitude that you are bringing to the situation than hers.

          Rob

  2. Julie says:

    Disagreeing with someone in a constructive way only adds to the rhetoric, and is positive. Striking out at the core of a person, particularly if unprovoked, is poison to them but also to yourself. People have a right to be as they are, live as they feel fit, and believe what they will believe. There is no one who doesn't have the right to exist or do what they will do (not when it doesn't hurt anyone else's right to live as they will). That is the difference between disagreement and hatred.

  3. timothy martin says:

    wowsa, GREAT GREAT post, i have no clue what the 1st comment means nor do i care! you're absolutely correct haters are gonna hate. why else would they seek to envelope someone in negativity. you are a bright shining light and a beacon of love in a sometimes unkind world. i am blessed to consider you a friend and inspiration. never doubt your purpose sometimes you just gotta outshine the dark when you're bringing lite to the world!

  4. Husna says:

    Dolphina, you are an amazing inspiration! I have owned and loved your DVDs and CDs for years. It is a joy to received your e-publications and I hope you feel the blessings I am sending you from my deepest appreciation.

    Peace & love always :)

    • Vision_Quest2 says:

      I just discovered Dolphina's dvds, thanks to the New York Public Library. I then bought two different Dolphina dvds for myself, new. I didn't want to keep bringing them back to the library. Teaching bellydance is a gift.

      Also a fan of two other Egyptian-style instructors …

      My 5 Rhythms (freeform style conscious dance) teacher noticed the difference in my dancing, too; after learning bellydance via dvd.

  5. Katalina Leon says:

    Wonderful post Dolphina! Taking one of your classes and dancing beside you is a joy!
    When I encounter haters I always stop to ask myself what they are really hating? If hating me is helping them blow-off a little steam–I consider it community service. There is no public life without critics.
    You put a lot of beautiful light in the world and that's what's important.

  6. Jerome says:

    You are an inspirationnal and enlighten person, Dolphina. Hater will and unfortunately be around, but you bring such a joie de vivre that, it warms and radiates the heart and one can’t help but feeling the flow of love and of light too.:)
    Thank you Dolphina.:)

  7. sarah says:

    great article! ….i love your sense of humor and your instruction was clear and to the point…you should submit your piece on when you dont feel like a goddess. i have read and re-read that one many times! i look forward to more! xo

  8. sandy says:

    Thank you, Dolphina, for a very uplifting article. It inspires hope in those who are going through similar ordeals in their life.

  9. Ronnie says:

    What a beautiful, helpful and inspiring post! There is so much wisdom here.

    Rock ON Dolphina — let's face it, even the fabulous Oprah has haters ;-) And girlfriend SURE got it goin' on (as do you).

    Keep soaring,
    Ronnie Ambar

  10. Meghen says:

    Great article Dolphina! I've never experienced anything but light and joy in your presence. Stay positive, girl! You're doing a great thing!

    Love, Meghen

  11. Linda Molina says:

    Thank you for the valuable advice. The best advice is from those who have had to learn through experience. I can even feel the lessons behind the advice. You have done so much for this world that only time will tell. Criticism can only be discerned as valuable by you. Some people are just very scared of your beautiful light & radiance that they must find a way to control it or belittle it. You are amazing & your reason for being opened a world of healing & magic for me, I thank you deep from my soul. Please don't ever stop doing what you are doing!

  12. Hi Sweet Dolphina

    The LIGHT that you so beautifully and consistently radiate blesses all and brings the darkness out, all part of the process. So thankful that you used the experience with someone more "in the shade" who directed it at you, as a learning experience and allowed others to be uplifted by your attitude. It takes courage in this world to stay aligned with light and beauty and not take it personally when reactions come from those who are not there yet. Sending you SO much love and gratitude! -Sage Holloway

  13. Surfer Boy says:

    The best ideas are always grabbed from collections of floating thoughts. Dolphina has reworded some of great psychological mechanisms for coping with worthless negativity and has once again reminded me to embrace the face of do-nothingers. An attempt to inspire others through a true expression of emotion from within. Not only is life more child-like and exhilarating, it has the ability to re-blossom the Spring of all willing observers and participants. Thank you for all the wonders of existence you have opened me to, Dolphina remains the embodiment of freedom within a truly feminine essence.

  14. Constandina says:

    Haters and Bullies seem to just be a waste of space on the planet … didn't somebody teach them "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all"?? But wait, the Lesson…ah yes, it is there isn't it??!! How do the bullies, abusers and critics seem to always know what our tender spots are ?? No worries, we all have them and we definitely need reminders about how to manage this. Thank you for caring about us !!

    • Tan says:

      Hi Constandina,

      I think you are right, somebody didn't teach the haters "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all"…hate breeds from hate and negativity, it's probably all they know and all this positivity that Dolphina radiates sets great fear in those people. I guess we solve this problem with tip #3…. Pour Honey! ;) One of the things I have learnt working with children is that the ones who are the angriest and the most hateful…are the most fearful. They hold so much anxiety inside and that comes from uncertainty and often, a lack of unconditional love. By opening your heart to those children every time you see them, you get to see their world change as they start to see it;s not as bad as the world they hold internally.

      Hate is a learned behaviour. My favourite question for someone who is so hateful towards me is "are you ok?" they are usually stumped by why you would care to ask once they have been so nasty to you, and often answer honestly with "well, no actually…" and then explain why. :)

      xx

      • Vision_Quest2 says:

        What young people call "hate" is not a learned behavior. I had actually been quite the pushover before perimenopause.

        Something happens to a woman when she matures. She (unless rich and/or beautiful) gets ignored. Not listened to. The body lacks resiliency. The mind gets political. Adaptation is necessary. That is the way of the life cycle …

  15. Jeani says:

    I have been following you for 10 years via Internet. I only wish I could someday take ur classes. You are SO positive!!! I don’t know how anyone can call you a hater, unless they are projecting. In this time we do have to deal with ppl who don’t agree with a view calling it hate. That word is thrown around like used clothes in a thrift store. And this is tragic! Hate is a serrious word, and ppl need to be more mindful of the words they label others with.
    I send you many blessing, you are an voice and comfort for so many.

  16. Rochelle says:

    You inspire with every cell of your being.

    xo Rochelle

  17. Dolphina,

    You have been helping women for years to feel great about themselves, anyone that has contact with you knows this. You are passionate, compassionate and you make a difference in the lives of others. Your article touched on great points with how to deal with things that make you feel less than. You are a goddess and an inspiration to all goddesses out there in the world. Thanks for the tips and never stop what you are doing. ;)

  18. Karroll says:

    Dolphina, thank you for sharing your beauty and your knowledge with us. As you've said in your posting haters gonna hate. If nobody every hates you for your beauty or your talent at some point in your life then you are not doing something right,

    With love and blessings,

    Karrollnyc

  19. Loved this article. For me, as a fellow belly dancer and bringer of light into the world, I too have encountered the haters. I often ask myself, "why is it that people feel the need to critique so negatively?" Didn't their mamas even teach them, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all. The internet is great. And, it does allow those who like to point out the negative an opportunity to do so. For me, I prefer to be "a good finder." There is always a gem in there somewhere. Why not compliment the gem, versus point out the less than stellar parts.

    In Spiraling Light,

    Laura in Hawaii

  20. Tan says:

    What a fantastic and timely post (for me personally). I have been struggling with writing my psychology thesis because of self-doubt. I keep telling myself that my supervisor will read my thesis and think "boy what an idiot, this girl has no idea what she is talking about” and it has been preventing me from handing in my first draft for weeks. I know that it is important to receive constructive criticism, though I think what is holding me back is the fact that each time I’ve had contact with my supervisor in the past it has had negative outcomes for me rather than helping me understand my project more, it has added more confusion and self-doubt. Some of the best advice has come from friends who have been through this process – listen to the feedback, take what you need from it, and throw away what you don’t. I think that is the best lesson I have ever been taught about receiving criticism.

    I read your previous post and what you were receiving was NOT criticism, it was hateful words from people who as you say are just going to hate regardless, they go looking for targets. I think your tip about writing the email/letter for yourself and then throwing it out (or burning it) is a great idea. Rather than sending all that negative energy back to the person who feeds off it, you are expelling it from yourself and then saying goodbye to it. A very healthy way to deal with negativity.

    I always find your posts whether here or on your blog, inspiring…I have to wonder what has happened in the lives of those who hate so much to make them feel that others don't deserve the accomplishments they have achieved in life. Bitterness is the greatest killer of people.

    Keep up you inspiring work!

    xx

  21. Barbara says:

    Hi Dophina, You are an inspiration to so many. Belly Dance grabs you.When you feel the mission and journey it is inevitable but not everyone understands or is free to follow their bliss. You speak for many. Sometimes our journeys of joy can be lonely because we are leading. Thanks for sharing. Keep dancing and sharing …….Love Barbara

  22. Rebecca says:

    I have been dancing to your videos (although, I admit not regularly enough) for the past 13 years, and even though you're way more girlie than I am, I still adore you and always feel so great about myself after the workout.
    I had a really bad week a few months ago and reached out to you, not thinking that someone as busy and well known as you would have any time to even read my little email. But, you did so much more than that. You took the time to respond to me – not only to respond to me, but to thank me for my honesty and for trusting you with my feelings.
    I felt so much love when I read your reply. It was surprising to me how supported and comforted I could feel by someone I have never even met. Maybe it's because you've lived inside my t.v. for so long, or maybe it's simply because your love and light are so powerful that they reached even me, all the way in Chicago that day.
    I don't care how many people feel they need to bring you down or discourage you. All I care about is that you don't stop reaching out and sharing your heart with anyone and everyone who needs it. You are a radiant, brilliant earth mother who deserves nothing but joy and good things.
    I will never forget what you have done for me and the love that you have shared with a girl you've never even met, on the other side of the country.
    Someday, I will hug you and we will hold on tight and both cry tears of joy.
    I love you, Dolphina. Thanks for this article.
    ~Becca~

  23. Debby says:

    Awesome article, you are an inspiration to women everywhere! In the past year I have been through 3 major family losses and a divorce and I have had so many people trying to tell me to give up on my dreams and face reality that it was great to read this and remind myself that I can do what I want/need to do for myself. Thank you so much!! Keep dancing!!
    Hugs!

  24. marie knoos says:

    Bugs are attracted to the light! (So if you are gonna shine you gotta just have that special bug repelling/zapping light and all will be well!! Hee hee! ) :)
    I read your article to my boy (who just started high school) It was so positive for him to hear because there are so many bullies, etc in schools…and bottom line: we just have to look at all the negative "attacks" as an OPPORTUNITY to bring out the best and highest in us!
    …..or in Hawaiian/surfing terms: "Duck dive that shit! "
    ….You don't become a hero by being normal! (quote from Paranorman)
    …All great oaks started out as nuts!
    …and my favorite:
    Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.
    -Albert Einstein

    So, bottom line: if they don't like it….GOOD!!! They can get out of your way because you are AWESOME! You are making a HUGE difference (and have for a long time!) and you are creating SO much beauty and inspiration in people!!!….don't you dare let them trip you! ) No worries love! Haters aren't goddesses… and vice versa……LOVE U! xoxoxoxo Marie & Gabriel

  25. Ariana says:

    Very true, plus it is good to remember that everyone has their own opinions. If we all thought the same our world would be blah. Life isn't always easy and there are going to be "haters" or rocks in your shoe as I like to call them, but you have to keep on and just discard the rock and keep walking. I used to work with kids and I tried to tell them that you may not like everyone but you should be polite, and realize that you have to live along side of them. Also like Rumi said "Our lives are like pieces of paper, every passer by leaves a mark." Good and bad our lives are affected by everyone we come into contact with, but it is our duty to decide how we are going to allow these things to affect our lives.

  26. Nancy says:

    You inspired me on DVD long before I met you in person. I feel blessed to have met you and shared classes and time with you. I continue to use not only the dance lessons you have taught, but your positive life lessons as a reminder to focus on the positive. And I am just one person, imagine all the lives you have touched that have not reached back to thank you or let you know your positive influence. THANK YOU <3

  27. Jane says:

    Overweight,and completely fatigued, your DVD's helped me to lose 60lbs., in a fun, gentle, and supportive way! You are not only incredibly beautiful on the outside ,but what really shines is your soulful, positive, extremely motivating gift! I am sure there are thousands of more people that feel the same way! Lately I have not been working out again, and this has motivated me to use your DVD's again! Never go away. You have helped in such a beautifully profound way!

  28. Cathy says:

    My experience with you as a person AND inspiration is just that inspiration. Haters are small people who obviously waste time and energy trying to make others small. Please carry on your mission because I for one benefit from it daily and you are one of the first "blogs" I tune into daily to get my inner Goddess going. There are many more lovers than haters out there, my dear. Just blow them to the wind. :D

  29. Loletta says:

    Everybody (wrong or right) is entitled to their own opinion. But I find sincerity seriously overrated by some people, who decide their opinion is relevant enough to shoot it others with it. Will this opinion be of use for anybody? Will it sadden the criticised person /make them feel bad in any way? Will the person they criticise change to become what the critic would like instead? And if so, is that good for anyone?

    I don't prefer hypocritical comments, much the other way round. But if not saying anything will keep your opinion the same and the rest of the world happier… that's my choice. Everyone else may do as they please. But what I do believe is, in the same way that "sincerity" is overrated (and encouraged by Internet anonymity), kindness and manners are overrated lately. Mostly when it comes to strangers / people that – most likely – you will never get to know in person and have a true perspective of what they are like in real, everyday life. Or have any relationship with. We tend to forget that what we know about public people is a percentage our own perception of what we read about them in a moment of our lives that has little or nothing to do with their lives. No interaction. Ah well, now I'm rambling…

  30. Lisa says:

    I think you have a lot of talent Dolphina, and you have proved it in so many ways. This article seems to be about you, and your issues. I find so hard to believe some of the super harsh comments from the "haters" you mentioned. Perhaps a bit of hype… I think most people with common sense would know all of these points. But I guess a good ole' advice doesn't hurt anyone.

    Not everyone is going to like you or what you do in the only way you seem to want it. As such, and as much as I find your products and style entertaining, and inspiring to a certain extent, it's not to the point to empower me. You are an entertainer. Your videos, routine, customs are gorgeous, and you are a beautiful woman. I have enjoyed very much your video lessons, and follow some of your readings and are entertained by it. There should be nothing wrong with it, and I am certainly not a hater. So, my advice is to accept the good and the bad, embrace that your talent is viewed in many different ways, and not everyone that doesn't fit your "world" is not a hater. Thinking like that would make you one of them. Warm Regards~

  31. Viviana Vicencio says:

    From the first time I met you ..through your belly dancing videos, I sensed your beautiful soul, and was inspired by the way you carry yourself and the manner with which you love what you do! I see the beauty you emanate as a woman, that showers us ''other women'' and gives us the hope to better love ourselves by creating joy! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your time dedicated to ''us'' thank you for inspiring, for helping us believe in ourselves, and for believing in the magic!
    I love Mr Emerson and i agree with him..I also love that you walk your own path by creating it…and you do not follow other's path, this makes you dear Dolphina a beautiful, unique gem among a whole bunch of rocks!
    I only believe in LOVE like the song goes…and that is all we should focus on, the rest is waste of our precious time, and I rather have you making an AWESOME CHANGE in the way women see themselves. I also agree in constructive criticism ..it keeps our ego in place, anyway just thought I share my feelings about you. You are one amazing woman, I read your blog some years ago…and we are alot alike, free spirits and daring! You truly journey through life with GUSTO! Keep up the awesome work, and sending loads of LOVE & LIGHT to one of my favorite people in the world! Even though I have never met you in person. About ''those people'' you just smile and love 'em anyway..the way i know you do. Ciao!!!

  32. Marylin says:

    Great article! Keep it rocking Dolphina!!! Thanks again for all the great tips. You actually inspired me to keep going for it years ago when I was ready to give up on my bellydancing so you just keeping being your beautiful self (inside and outside)!

  33. Vision_Quest2 says:

    It depends on your milieu. It would have been easy for me to "hate" if you stood for and/or promoted "Inner Goddess Yoga" or something like that, a type of yoga which never floated my boat beyond first blush. I've gotten serious about yoga over the past few years, and I don't do yoga several times a week with the purpose and aspiration for empowering the female "goddess" or "yoga goddess" within me through your "brand" of "yoga", were you to espouse that.

    One old lady's perspective.

  34. Krystle says:

    Dolphina's article has helped me so much…She's such an inspiration!

  35. Auki says:

    Many New Age & yoga folks think you are not being positive if you hold a contrary opinion to theirs. I'm all for practicing loving kindness, but when my opinion on a specific issue is contrary to yours it does not make me a negative person. Maybe your opinion is the negative one, disguised in a cloak of superficial positivity.

    • Vision_Quest2 says:

      I know whereof you speak. Some yoga teachers are extraordinarily doctrinaire. Some are afraid or ill-equipped to deal with REAL HOUSEHOLDERS (rather than the construct) and all that that entails …

  36. Brandy says:

    I too am a good person that tries to help people and all creatures and try to make the world a better place that who people are drawn too .. very loving, kind -hearted and peaceful..and sometimes i experience "haters" :-(… i am also a "unique" looking person like you are (never admit i am attractive..lol ).. I LOVE YOU DOLPHINA.. I LOVE YOUR VIDEOS and YOU as a person. I tell everyone about how great your videos make me feel..how you educate in your videos as well as make us feel better…I take your Goddess videos with me and do them with my girlfriends, kids, everyone..we love you. PLEASE don't ever let these "haters" get to you..THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT THEY WANT! DON'T LET THEM HAVE THE PLEASURE OF BRINGING SUCH A GREAT PERSON DOWN TO THEIR MISERABLE SAD LEVEL..cuz that's what they are..and that's why they try to bring everyone else down cuz they want everyone else to be miserable like they are :-(

  37. Christina says:

    Delphina, thank you so much for your wonderful thoughts and insights; I am printing this to carry with me for inspiration in times of need. I have followed you for a long time via the Internet. I live on the opposite coast from you, but I hope some day to be able to take one of your classes. I don't know how anyone can hate you or your purpose; if someone diagrees with you, why do they have to be so hateful?? There's enough hate and nastiness in the world….let's all try to be a little kinder and more tolerant. I think you are wonderful!

  38. Standards Matter says:

    Dolphina, your work is definitely helpful to a lot of women. If you have received criticism from other bellydancers, such as the comment that you've destroyed bellydancing, they're only referring to the fact that your technique is loose and unrefined and could benefit from some Egyptian-style training. It probably bothers a lot of other dancers that you've done so well commercially without having achieved a professional level of dance technique. Most of them, I'm sure, would recant their criticisms if they were to see that you took your dancing seriously enough to update and upgrade your technique – that's all…. continued in next post.

  39. Standards Matter says:

    If you're not sure what I'm talking about as far as your technical abilities, check out youtube videos by anyone like Hadia, Yasmina Ramzy, or the Egyptian biggies like Randa Kamal or Tito Seif, or even some of the popular superstars like Sadie or Jillina, and compare the details of their hip and arm work to yours. Within a few months of intensive training with a good Egyptian-style teacher, you would earn the respect of the naysayers, and feel more confident about your own dancing as well. Everyone who loves this Dance wants it displayed to the public eye as a high art form, so work on your chops a little and get back out there with a vengeance.

  40. Kim Rollo says:

    Although I have never met you in person, I have been joyously dancing to your bellydance and burlesque dvds for years. You are a beautiful, bright and shining beacon in a world of darkness. And an extremely fun and inspirational instructor, to boot. So shine on, lovely one and ignore those who think that their candle will burn more brightly just because they've blown out yours.

  41. The Hater says:

    or you can try HatersGunk – Spread Love, Share Hate

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