“Be led by your dreams, not driven by your fears.” ~ Betty Crowson
An urgent phone call filled with tears, fear, hurt—and suddenly your life changes. As spring approaches, I am forced to remember a call I received nine years ago that confirmed my mom, aptly named Hope, had a deadly form of ovarian cancer.
I am also reminded of part of my speech from her funeral, one year ago:
“Look around and notice the beautiful trees with their white blossoms during the spring, or the sunburst yellow bushes you saw on the drive here. Smell the air and look at the beautiful place around us and the loved ones next to you. I have realized that this second is all that matters and my mother would want us to enjoy each one of them.”
The transformation of my attitude from nine years ago to the day of her funeral was remarkable. It occurred because of the journey my mother took my family, her friends and many others on.
The most important lesson that she taught was about acceptance. Not acceptance in a way of giving up, but acceptance as a tool to appreciate the situation you are a part of. Say you are in a job that you aren’t the fondest of, or it seems like the entire world is against you. My mom would share a few words of advice and tell me to:
“Stop fighting and accept. Realize that this is the situation you are in right now, but know it is not where you will always be.”
One awesome way she taught me to understand acceptance was by taking 10 to 15 minutes to write in my journal. I can still hear her say:
“Write a few things from one year ago, six months ago, and even yesterday that you were worried about. Now think about those worries and what really occurred.”
I promise you that most of those worries I wrote down never occurred and in fact great things happened in place of them.
This activity helps create understanding of your emotions. It gives you knowledge so the next time you find yourself worrying, you might just catch yourself thinking, “Is this really worth worrying about?”
I encourage you to take those 10 to 15 minutes and try that exercise. You will find great relief, even if you feel that relief for only five minutes.
Learning about acceptance allowed me to understand the second most important lesson my mother taught. It was based on a saying she heard from her life coach Betty Crowson:
“Be led by your dreams, not driven by your fears.”
What that meant to her was to be able to laugh and joke in the face of her possible death, learn new life lessons—such as the importance of meditation—and to do things that she would have never let herself do before because of the “what ifs.”
While sitting in a chemo session with Mom one day, we came up with a great business idea. We didn’t start it because we let the “what ifs” and fear control us.
Living in a busy city can become very overwhelming as there is no time to stop and breathe. We knew the city needed a place where you could have a moment of peace and happiness every day.
It took until after our mom passed away for us to understand how to share these life lessons. That is why we created our retail store, Homh.
Homh is the first store designed to help you slow down and clear your head so you can continue your day in a positive way.
We carry this goal out in four ways:
- Homh is designed to feel like you just left the city behind and entered a sanctuary made just for you.
- We offer a handcrafted tea experience; meditate with Pu’erh or create with Matcha teas.
- Journals, positive affirmation decals, relaxation mats, books and other merchandise can be sampled to enhance your in-store experience and may be purchased.
- Short classes are available for the busy person to learn meditation, Reiki, Qigong, tea tasting and much more.
To make this amazing store a reality, we started an Indiegogo campaign, a new way to fund creative projects via the internet. We recently launched our campaign and unveiled Homh to the public. Click on the link to learn more about our passion and vision.
My mom’s lessons and inspiration allowed me to take the jump and do what makes me happy. I hope you took some understanding away from this article that you can use in your own life.
Evan Freed, along with his brother Ryan, is the co-founder of the retail store, Homh. Evan’s goal is to help pass on the lessons of positivity, happiness and spirituality he has learned from his mother, life coach and amazing books. In his spare time he enjoys cooking up healthy feasts, meditating, skiing, playing hockey, reading and spending time with his fiancé. He also loves to involve himself in the life long journey of appreciating and accepting the world around him. Evan can be contacted at [email protected].
Like elephant Spirituality on Facebook
Ed: Thandiwe Ogbonna & Brianna Bemel