(More Than) 101 Lessons I Will Share With My Daughter.

Via on Sep 13, 2013

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As a Life Coach and Women’s Mentor, I work with many young ladies who are looking for guidance and direction as they blossom into their womanhood and femininity.

As a female walking through the human experience, during my own youth, I was looking for the same thing. I never had a mother to teach me or show me the way. I—through trial and error, running into (many) walls, stumbling with two left dancing feet—somehow made it through with tenacity and well-earned grace.

To spare the young women I work with—as well as for my future daughter—here are some important lessons I have shared and will share.

These are some things all women should know.

1. Make travel a top priority. Seeing how other countries and cultures live, function and operate will give you a broader framework and understanding of life and the world.

2. Before you turn 21, live in three foreign countries for at least six months each—this will give you street smarts, maturity and adaptability. You’ll be able to relate with more people, it will add to your character and you’ll have a lot of crazy-fun stories and memories. There are friends, lovers and family waiting to meet you all over the world.

3. Enjoy your own company—you’re going to be living with yourself for the rest of your life.

4. Pick your friends like you pick your fruit—you are the company you keep.

5. Cook for yourself and for others—preparing meals with your own hands is a gesture of love and full of nurturing and nourishment.

6. Karma is real—all the experiences we have in life that are painful, are meant to be painful; this is so you can realize, heal, evolve and move on. And never repeat the same mistakes ever again.

7. Everything has a cause and effect, everything comes full circle—these are great reasons in itself to be a nice and honest person.

8. Being a fast learner will get you very far in life—pay attention.

9. Saying ‘no’ is just as important, if not more, as saying ‘yes’—stand resolute in your own truth. Be firm in what you’re allowing in and what you have boundaries around.

10. Life is benevolent, kind and gracious—even through the moments of pain. Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional and most of the time, unnecessary.

11. If you’re not having fun and if it’s not worth your time—don’t do it! Your time is precious.

12. Health, happiness, friends, family, love and art = essentials.

13. You are privileged—you are educated, have food to eat, shower with hot water and sleep in a comfortable bed. That’s more than what half the people on this planet have and live with.

14. Read and write every day—you will be ahead of the crowd.

15. Expand your mind—learn something new everyday.

16. Call me anytime, I’m here for you through anything—but always remember that actions speak louder than words and only you can make the change happen.

17. True beauty comes from the inside—always look there first.

18. Forgive, forgive, forgive—as if you have amnesia.

19. Pride is a waste of time and rooted in ego. Ego is rooted in fear.

20. Do your yoga and meditation practice on the daily—this will keep you centered, stable, strong and clear for life.

21. No matter what age, there will always be mean, jealous, ignorant, arrogant girls—ignore them.

22. Girls want attention; women want respect—know the difference.

23. Leave every thing and every one better than you’ve found it.

24. Let things roll off your shoulders—travel light, be light, live light.

25. To illuminate darkness all you have to do is turn on the light.

26. The world needs your opinion and point of view—vocalize your thoughts and feelings.

27. Yes, you can borrow my wardrobe. Just please be careful and don’t leave any stains.

28. Dr. Bronner’s soap gets blood stains out.

29. Trust is earned, not given—once you break someone’s trust and faith in you, it takes 10x
longer to gain it back.

30. Self love. Self care. Self worth—all of life’s unfoldings stem down to these three things.

31. Unattachment and acceptance are daily, moment-to-moment practices.

32. Self control leads to Self mastery.

33. Treat your body well—it’s the only vehicle you’ve got for the rest of your life.

34. Moderation is more sustainable than overindulging and/or depreciation.

35. Live your life from gratitude, love, appreciation and compassion.

36. May love inform every decision you make—if fear creeps in, just kick it in the ass.

37. Have a keen, developed and refined ear for good music.

38. Go to museums.

39. Have friends all over the world, of all walks of life, of all different age groups—this will lead to varied and interesting conversations and connections.

40. Cleanliness is godliness.

41. No prayer request is ever too small or silly to ask for.

42. Wash your face every night before bed—use facial masks regularly.

43. Brush your teeth at least twice a day.

44. Practice understanding and extending love instead of passing judgment.

45. Commit yourself to what you love and go for it. Fully.

46. Saying “sorry” first is a strength, not a weakness.

47. Never go to bed upset or angry.

48. If you’re unsure about something, sit on it until you’re sure.

49. Great mascara is worth the investment.

50. Trust your heart.

51. Study the lives of world altering/society changing/revolutionary/history making people:
Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King Jr, Krishnamurti, Terence McKenna, Ram Dass, Malcom X, Einstein, John Lennon, etc.

52. Appreciate all the teachers in your life—they’re not honored nearly as enough as they should.

53. Be weary of people who talk too much or place themselves on a pedestal.

54. Stay away from people who are arrogantly radiating in their own inflated ego.

55. Stay planted with both feet on the ground and treat everyone as equals—speak eye to eye to all beings.

56. Gossiping is different than telling the truth of your own experience—know the difference.

57. Know who you can trust—have a close, inner support-system throughout your life.

58. If you’re going to fight, fight fair and make it worth everyone’s time.

59. Your father and brothers have laid the groundwork for how all men should treat you—don’t settle for anything less.

60. Strong men aren’t intimidated by strong women.

61. Don’t give your power away to anyone or anything—seek balance and equanimity in all your relations.

62. If someone’s not interested in you because they don’t have power and/or authority over you, they’re not worth your time.

63. Sex is beautiful and a divine gift. As a female, you have the key to the chamber door. Don’t give yourself away too easily. Hold yourself as you would a sword, not too loose, not too tight—just right.

64. Be sexually empowered—touch yourself, so you know what your body likes.

65. Being a lesbian is okay, being into men is okay, being into both men and women is okay, any preference
you choose sexually is okay— just promise that you will be responsible.

66. Communication is key for all lasting relationships.

67. If he/she has a girlfriend/boyfriend or wife/husband—walk away. You’ll get over it eventually.

68. Date, date, date! Explore all different types and kinds of men and/or women of your fancy. Your youth is meant for experimentation. You’ll get to know more of yourself in reflection to an other. When it comes time to make a more informed decision, you’ll have the personal experience to choose with wisdom.

69. Don’t be afraid to tell people how you feel about them—they will appreciate it.

70. Express your love!

71. Don’t give advice unless asked for your two cents.

72. If someone needs a hand, help them with both of yours (and your feet too.)

73. No matter how old you are, keep your five year old inside awake and alive! Being rambunctious and mischievous will keep your life full of color and play.

74. Be creative in the ways in which you show and give love.

75. Know your inherent basic needs, wants and desires.

76. Don’t let society dictate anything you think, feel or believe.

77. Seek truth in all things.

78. Sit with the fear long enough until it transmutes into love. That’s the opportunity, initiation and invitation.

79. You always have a choice between fear and love. Choose love.

80. It’s okay to be sad and blue—that’s part of being human.

81. Long hair maintenance = find an amazing leave-in conditioner.

82. Have humor and levity in everything you do—don’t take yourself too seriously.

83. Heat your eyelash curler with a blowdryer before you curl your lashes—this will keep them curled longer.

84. Embrace bad hair days.

85. Crying is natural and totally okay—never suppress your emotions. Better out than in.

86. You can’t control what others think of you—just be yourself.

87. Not everyone is going to like you—just be yourself.

88. Read The Bhagavad Gita and know it as you would your best friend.

89. Make your first kiss special—wait for the right one.

90. Be adventurous and curious about life.

91. Stop for sunsets and always keep your face towards the rising sun.

92. Assumptions and expectations will make you miserable— get rid of all of them.

93. Boyfriends and husbands need girlfriends and wives—not a mother.

94. If you see a pretty flower, smell it.

95. Love fearlessly—you only live once.

96. Your heart will break at least a dozen times—the heart must break in order for it to grow. Keep loving anyway.

97. If you don’t have direct experience in the topic of choice, don’t speak as if you know what you’re talking about.

98. Challenge yourself to go beyond your own potential.

99. Dive deep into oceanic waters—metaphorically and literally.

100. Speak at least two languages fluently.

101. Work first, play second—then you can do both!

102. Play and fun are two very important things.

103. Spend time with the trees and plants.

104. Seek wisdom—not riches. Real wealth lies in the heart.

105. Trust your intuition—listen to your inner voice.

106. Keep your wild animalistic nature alive.

107. Tend to your dreams, visions and aspirations daily with sunlight, air and water.

108. Imagine.

109. Have a heart that doesn’t cling.

110. Keep the fire of desire kindled in your heart at all times.

111. There’s no such thing as perfection; only progress.

112. What matters most is how you treat people: with love, kindness and respect.

113. Anytime you feel fear in life, don’t run away from it. Feel the fear and do it anyway.

114. Anytime you believe in something and someone tells you that you can’t do it, laugh in their
face and pretend they’re joking.

115. If you can imagine it, you can make it real.

116. Treat your friends as lovers and your lovers as friends.

117. Always be a lady; but also know how to hang and kick it with the boys.

118. Prissiness and neediness are neither cute nor endearing.

119. Laziness is a disease; don’t catch it.

120. Self discipline is your best friend.

121. Don’t half-ass anything. Do it well or not at all—even making the bed.

122. Every morning is a new day, a new chance, a new opportunity to make it better than the last.

123. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes—that’s how we learn. Growing and evolving is worth the
time.

124. Life is a learning playground—be open to receiving the lessons.

125. Teach the ego humility and silence.

126. The key to communicating is listening.

127. Be able to relate to human beings of all walks of life. Practice this skill daily.

128. Know the difference between empathy and sympathy.

129. Embrace your femininity.

130. Move through life from place of stillness, stealth and quietude—let others who make their
noise, make their noise. You’ll be further along in the long run.

131. Be emotionally mature and responsible.

132. Energetic etiquette is very much appreciated.

133. Don’t take anything personally—everyone is fighting their own battles and demons.

134. Character, loyalty and dignity are more important than clothes, cars and money.

135. Tell the truth. No matter what.

136. When you have to go to battle, make sure you have sharps tools.

137. Inhale deeply, exhale deeply.

138. Conscious breathing will heal anything and everything.

139. Allow for room and space for others to make their mistakes. We’re all human—including you.

140. It’s not your job to make other people happy. Your job is to make you happy.

141. Don’t put other people’s needs before your own—regardless of your love from them. Take care of
yourself first and then: give from a place of fullness vs. depletion.

142. You’re not a martyr—getting in the way of someone else’s karma is irresponsible.

143. It’s ok to disagree—don’t be a people pleaser.

144. You are your own being, as well as everyone else.

145. No one person can be your everything—you will have at least five soul mates in your life.

146. Everyone is doing their best that they can with the resources they know and have.

147. Don’t take anything personally. It’s never about you.

148. Be passionate about what you love.

149. Do all things with great love—that is the secret ingredient.

150. Style, elegance, grace and swiftness—these elements are key.

151. Laugh everyday—the deep belly kind.

152. True friends are family and lifelong.

153. Be comfortable in your skin.

154. Be nice, sweet and kind.

155. Don’t be afraid to be a bitch when you need to be.

156. Tread lightly in the lives of others.

157. Boundaries are healthy.

158. Respect and honor are prerequisites for any type of relationship.

159. Do all things that nourish and feed your soul.

160. Stay close to Spirit, commune with the invisible everyday.

161. Say ‘thank you’ and ‘please.’

162. Never take anyone for granted—express your love and appreciation at every chance you get.

163. Sprinkle more love onto everything that you do.

164. It’s ok to walk away– nothing ever grows in the land of the comfort zone.

165. Delve into the arts and study the works of masters of whom you are inspired by.

166. Express your creativity at any and every moment—create at least one piece of art a day.

167. Be gentle and soft in speech and touch—communicate with emphasis on your energy over your
words.

168. Honor the differences between men and women—we are different creatures.

169. True love never dies, it only changes flavor and texture.

170. Make your home your temple and sanctuary.

171. Spend time with those you love.

172. Spend time in nature.

173. Everything in life is showing you how to open your heart. More and more and more.

174. Find mentors and guides in your life. They will make your path more joyful and easeful.

175. Be a mentor and guide to others once you’ve crossed that line.

176. Be excellent at communicating and getting your point across—be direct, short and sweet. Don’t beat around the bush, you’re wasting time.

177. Make decisions based on the highest outcome for all parties involved.

178. Communicate and respond; not communicate and react.

179. We don’t have to struggle; all obstacles are there for us to learn how to gracefully remove them.

180. We have around 100 or so human years on this planet—use time wisely in what you are share with the world around you. Be efficient, efficacious and creative in how you create your
life and surroundings. The world is a canvas; have fun.

181. You are Spirit in human form. Embody balance and integration between Spirit and Material.

182. Trust and have faith in yourself. Always remember that I believe in you.

183. Love every thing and every one as yourself.

184. Treat every thing and every one as God in drag.

185. Pay attention and be present. Make eye contact.

186. You are beautiful, you are beautiful, you are beautiful.

187. I love you, I love you, I love you.

Sisterhood and the resurgence of power for the feminine is awakening on this planet—let’s all support and uplift one another to be all that we can be.

With of course, love, grace and compassion.

Om.

Like elephant family on Facebook.

Ed: Sara Crolick/Bryonie Wise

About Chloe Park

Chloe Park is an Artist, Spiritual Teacher, Yoga and Meditation Instructor, Holistic Healing Practitioner, Life Coach, Women's Empowerment Leader, Social Change Activist and Ethnobotanist. A traveling Healer and Teacher, she roams the Earth to share her message: unconditional love, self-healing and awakening. She uses the medium of writing, holistic healing, medicinal plants, yoga and meditation to help all those along the Path to attain harmony with mind, body and spirit. She is devoted to facilitating the space for Healing, Love and Truth and is passionate about bringing ancient practices and traditions into the modern times we live. Her intention with her writing is to offer Q&A for all those who are engaged in the dialogue. Chloe also writes for MindBodyGreen, Healthline, WorldLifestyle, and Yahoo Shine!. To stay connected with her current projects, retreats, teachings and traveling schedule, find her on Facebook: www.facebook.com/chloeparkhealing or visit her website: www.chloeparkhealing.com. Spiritual counseling and life coaching sessions with Chloe are available via Skype. May we all wake up together. ॐ

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2 Responses to “(More Than) 101 Lessons I Will Share With My Daughter.”

  1. Balance says:

    So beautiful! Thank you :)

  2. Lenka says:

    Lovely!! Gonna teach my daughter same! THANK YOU XXX

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