This One’s for My Skinny Sisters.

Via on May 23, 2014

scrawny sistas

I am a size zero.

I am as active and inactive as anyone else.

There are stretches where I don’t use my body and other days where I find myself on my mat twice a day.

My metabolism is on steroids: I burn through sugar faster than a tub of Ben and Jerry’s in the hands of a woman watching chick flick re-runs after a break up.

I have never shoved my finger down my throat, or been on a diet.

I have tried to gain weight through certain parts of my life—feeling self conscious of my weight and envious of women with beautiful full hips. I tried protein shakes, lifting weights—but saw little changes in my body weight. I became more muscular and fit, but my thin ass stuck around.

Some days I steam kale and eat like my body is a temple and other days I eat popcorn for dinner. I eat whatever I want, when I want and feel good about it.

I’m just little.

I used a picture of my back for the feature image of my last article “A Take No Shit List For Your Well Being.”

A woman commented on the article saying,

“Wouldn’t it be even better if the picture were of a person more realistic? This size zero blow dried super tan model just turns me right off the content.”

I was the size zero in that photograph.

The day I took the image holding my hands powerfully above me amongst mountain peaks I had hiked 24 kms into a valley in Jasper National Park to camp in the bush. I hadn’t showered, I was sweating, I was greasy from bug dope and covered in dirt. Nothing was blow dried or airbrushed. The article was about standing in our power—and in that image I was gloriously basking in my own.

I am also not a model. I am a real breathing woman that walks amongst this earth beside all of you.

Size zeros are real women too. Models, for that matter, are real women to.

I understand that our world might be sick of media shoving glorified, thin, air brushed models down our throats, but is the solution to throw all skinny women under a bus because they don’t have hips to hold on to?

We are the reason skinny woman splatter front pages of magazines. So instead of spiting fire at a woman because she gets paid to be photographed or has a Thumbelina waist, why not revolt against the seeds we planted that grew into an existence of a world obsessed with exploiting woman and body image.

In her article “The Beauty Myth,” Naomi Wolf reported that, “thirty-three thousand women told American researchers they would rather lose ten to fifteen pounds than achieve any other goal.”

Through repeated images of excessively thin women in media, advertisement, and modeling, thinness has become associated with not only beauty, but happiness and success.

From my skinny ass to you: that’s horrendous bollocks.

If we want to radically shift our world we need to begin stepping over body image—trivial measurements of our worth and beauty, and relentlessly love ourselves.

“Authentic self-love is crazy sexy, whatever your body looks like.” ~ Bryan Reeves

We live in a world where we are quick to judge a women by what the label on her pants say.

A woman’s “realness” and divinity has diddly squat to do with her waist size.

I want skinny to stop being idolized by the world and I also want women to stop throwing it under the bus.

I want us to all love our juicy souls and fleshy bodies and ride the bus together free of compare, resent and judgements.

The solution isn’t to pass a thin woman on the street and tell her to “eat something.”

I have been self conscious of my body for most of my life. I tip toe and refrain from saying it out loud, because people get offended that someone who’s “skinny” could struggle with body image.

Yes, “size zeroes” have issues with self acceptance and body image too. You won’t automatically be at home in your body when you shrink your waist—that’s not how it works.

We all have to love the crap out of ourselves every damn day.

I get flack about my weight all the time. This summer I had a man walk beside me after a delicious, stretchy yoga class as I basked in the sun drinking coffee and remark,

“Jesus, gain some weight.”

I have people make jokes at the expense of my size on a weekly basis. When I suggest eating a big ol’ greasy burger with poutine at the restaurant I serve at, people scoff and say, “sure, like you eat the likes of those.” They laugh, naïve that what they are doing is in fact misplaced and even abusive.

When I was younger, the girls on my volleyball team laughed at my skinny, knobby knees and flat chest. My nickname was “twiggy.”

I hated my body.

I will never forget the older boys at school who sneered and laughed and bullied me growing up because I was skinny—the ones who inspired my self esteem to build some nasty beliefs about myself that I am still undoing.

I will never forget the women who came up to me in a shopping mall when I was 14 and put their hands around my ankles, measuring the size of my legs and shrieking disgustedly at my size.

I wonder if they would have done the same if I was a 300 pound woman?

There seems to be an awful lot of light on bullying of people who swing to one side of the scale—but what about the other?

A friend of mine told me the other day her nine year old sibling is constantly bullied at school and wears baggy-sleeved shirts in shame of his body. His teacher even brought up that he was “too skinny” in front of his whole class. Allowing and encouraging a class full of fragile, thirsty minds to hear his idiocy and carry on treating others abusively.

After a self growth course this year, a woman approached me and thanked me for sharing my struggle for self acceptance and love about my size zero skinny ass; previously she had had no idea that thin women got bullied too. She had been on the other end of the getting-made-fun-of weight spectrum and was shocked to hear me speak of my own path of accepting and loving my own body.

This just in: we all have to walk a journey to self love and acceptance.

We all have insecurities and parts of our bodies we might feel ashamed of or wish were just a little big bigger or smaller.

We all must face discrimination, assumptions, judgements and deal with other people’s opinions of our shells.

We are dealt genetic cards at birth and show up in all shapes and sizes. Some of us have petite bums, some of us have asses to hold on to, some of us are dealt pancakes, some of us get tits that inspire other women to take fat of their ass and sew it to their chests. We are all so damn perfect and worthy of walking this planet free from harassment.

So unless we figure out a way to turn back time and negotiate our genetics with the universe, I get double A boobs and this skinny ass.

And all of it is just a shell—like wrapping paper tossed aside on Christmas morning to uncover the juicy and sweetest parts of our souls.

I still get in fights with my self esteem from time to time, but I am ferociously learning to take myself as I am and to love myself up—in all my phenomenal skinny glory.

“Nothing makes a woman more beautiful than the belief that she is beautiful.” ~ Sophia Loren

The first step in disintegrating body image discrimination is connecting with our own raw hearts before we speak. The solution is being able to see women in all shapes and sizes and refrain from making unjustified assumptions on their diets.

The solution is not to wonder how much she eats and if when she gets up to pee halfway through her meal if she is going to shove her finger down her throat in the company of a toilet.

Skinny is not superior. It’s just another measurement floating around in the genetic universe.

Our souls, our beauty, and our brilliance is not measured by something as trivial as our waist size or our exteriors.

“Size does not make a difference—we cannot take our bodies with us into eternity.”-Thomas Voelker

The solution is to just really love each other, exactly as we are.

I am writing today to say all bodies are beautiful, but I am speaking specifically to speak to my scrawny sisters—those of you who get flack all the damn time—and are too afraid to speak out against outrageous, malicious comments, opinions and jokes because you are “lucky” to be little.

You are extraordinary in all your skinny glory; you are magnificent in all your Thumbelina smallness. I love all hundred and five pounds of each of your size zero asses—don’t spend a moment in shame when faced with other’s disposable opinions of your exterior.

And to those of you who poke fun at my slim sisters, my brosistas, or myself—with preconceived misconceptions that your imposed opinions are somehow justified—hear me roar.

I will not stand for your harassment. I will not cower down from your inappropriate stares at my lanky legs and knobby knees, I will not bend over and take your foolish, atrocious assumptions on what my body “should” look like. I will not shove my head in the sand and be assaulted by your blatant ignorance.

My skinny, healthy ass is marvelous as it is.

And so is yours.

So let’s all get on the damn bus together and build a world that isn’t measured by the width of our hips.

Let’s build one that is measured by the walloping, insourmountable beauty within our hearts and the undeniable succulence of our souls.

More love—less of everything else.

authors own (skinny ass)

“Though she be but little, she is fierce.” ~ William Shakespeare

 

Relephant Reads! 

> Why I’d Rather be a Skinny B**** 

Can We Retire the Phrase “Real Women,” Please?

Skinny Love: Skin & Bones.

 

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Editor: Renée Picard

Images: courtesy of Janne Robinson

About Janne Robinson

Janne Robinson is currently residing on the Sunshine Coast, BC learning to cut kindling with her teeth and make friends with the black bears in the woods. You can find her coordinating fundraisers for Veterinarians Without Borders, stretching her soul in yoga, skinny dipping with glee in the moonlight and getting dirty in her garden. She loves Billie Holiday, the smell of freshly cut cedar and whiskys that sway their hips when they walk and know what they are doing. You can connect with her on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. Please also visit and connect with her Facebook writer's page.

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206 Responses to “This One’s for My Skinny Sisters.”

  1. Justine says:

    Beautifully written, thank you so much for this.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      You're so welcome Justine.

      warmly,

      Janne

    • Suzanne says:

      I SO appreciate this- your writing, your perspective and the fact that SOMEONE is finally saying this publicly!
      I am NOT a size 0- I am a very mid-weight, size 6-8, but I have noticed and been entirely annoyed when I do lose weight (usually after being sick), that people find it appropriate to say "You're so skinny!" as if it's a complement.
      I look at them and I say, "well that's rude".
      I know they mean well, but I think it's inappropriate to comment on being skinny, fat, etc. Sure! Say I look strong if I do, say I look happy if I do, say I look tired- whatever, but euughhhhh! It makes me so angry that people are so short-sided and one-dimensional.
      I too, have defended people I've seen on the street- when people I'm with comment that they must be anorexic- with the obsession with accepting heavier people we have made no place for thin people.
      SO yes! Rock your beautiful self! and thank you!

    • Loki says:

      Well I think your gorgeous. Tx for sharing

    • Anjela says:

      Wow. I never knew there was discrimination the other way around. I always thought that it was people who were overweight that got picked on. It seemed like people always wanted to aspire to be thin. I am 5'-5" and 230 pounds. My stomach is a little pudgy, but I have nice thighs and hips. I used to have a chest that people would pay to get 40 G cup, I was known for my huge chest and I was self conscious about it since I was in 3rd grade. I was the only kid in 3rd grade wearing a 36 B cup. I inherited this large chest size from my grandmother. I always wished for a smaller chest so that I would stop being harassed. Well in July of 2011 I was diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer Stage 3B. I went through chemo, surgery and radiation. They took both of my breasts and I had reconstructive surgery. I asked my surgeon to make my breasts as small as possible without me looking weird. I now have 44 B cup size breasts. I love the new size, but more than that I am happy to be alive. Do I wish I was thinner? Yes, but I love myself as is and don't spend time beating myself up for the weight I am. If you would like to contact me to comment or talk my email is arush.jackson@gmail.com or you can find me on facebook under the name Anjela Rush-Jackson

    • Nat says:

      Janne, you are so right here. I have been on both sides of the spectrum, I was a very skinny kid/adolescent that was lanky and stick like. I had boys call me anorexic and girls hate me just because I was thin. Later in college I went and gained a lot of weight (combination of processed foods and a slower metabolism). I once overhead a man say to his friends, that I had a pretty face but too bad for my fat body. People in my family even commented…One bout of anorexia, some yo yo dieting and a decade later I am finally in a place where I love my body and fill it with only good food, most of the time.

    • Valerie says:

      Thank you for such a well written reminder for us not to think that tho someone is a different size than us, it's all a part of who they are and why we love them. Big or small, short or tall, the shell of the person doesn't define us.
      thank you!!

  2. elephantjournal says:

    Mary Bradley Love this! Thank you!!
    Like · Reply · 1 · about an hour ago

    Lauren H Wow…this article feels like it was written about me. I've been skinny my whole life too (well, fluctuated about 20 pounds) but I get it. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

    Mercedes B Oooh gosh I am in this very same boat. Everyone assumes I'm puking or on drugs…non of which are true! Just very lil parents n a crazy fast metabolism

    Jen Blanchard Thanks for this!

    Tania Diaz M Andrea M

    Allison L Thank you! Working on undoing all that insecurity myself…

    Paula S Thank you for writing this. thank you thank you thank you.

  3. elephantjournal says:

    Dana M: <3

    Olivia M This is perfect.

  4. SerendipitySandii says:

    WOW!! Completely nailed it!! My skinny ass humbly thanks you! X

  5. Kris Lord says:

    From one teeny gal to another, thanks. :) I was also very self-conscious of my small size as a child, not to mention going through late puberty (losing my last baby tooth as a sophomore in high school. On the upper right side. Looked good in my soccer photos…). I am familiar with the snide comments to 'gain some weight' from perfect strangers, and I've never understood why they felt it was appropriate to comment, when to say the opposite to a larger person is incredibly rude. Thankfully, I've reached the age where I just don't give a crap anymore, and I enjoy my build and my strength.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Here's to not giving a crap!

      Love that- Thank you for sharing Kris :)

      with warmth,

      Janne

  6. Kate Stockford says:

    Awesome article, Im not teeny, not large but curvy and have/had body image issues as do most women at some point in their lives , sometimes for their whole life. So sad. Women's bodies are so beautiful when naked, big or small. If that last photo is of you, beautiful, you don't have a skinny bum :), you have a beautiful womanly bum :D. Thank you for a fantastic article. xx

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Kate,

      Yes! This article was about the flack on body image I've had in my body but it was mainly about all bodies- and just loving our souls up regardless of what the label on our pants says. All bodies are beautiful!

      The last photograph is the one I received some flack for- and Thank you, I am proud of my whole teeny body and bum ;)

      Thank you for writing to say so, sister.

      warmly,

      Janne

  7. Jim says:

    I'm a skinny 54 year old male. I've heard the same comments my whole life. It crosses the gender line too. Oh well. I'm proud I don't carry a beer belly – and my wife is too!

    • elephantjournal says:

      Was thinking this through the whole article. Much of this is human nature–our weak tendency to prejudge others is sadly universal. :)

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Jim,

      I tried to swap this to make it less gender specific a few times- but when writing about my own personal experiences it was hard to apply the whole article to all skinnes- regardless of gender. I tried to throw in a "brosista". I will work at making my writing including of us all- thanks for the reminder.

      with warmth,

      Janne

  8. Charity says:

    I was a 5'6 105 lb flat chested "girl" until I hit my mid 30's. I remember trying everything to gain weight just so I could feel better about my tiny body. I was treated and referred to as a young lady or girl until I finally had breast enhancements and gained weight. I have 3 children now and weigh 135…I am also pushing 40. Now I've been made to feel uncomfortable because I'm a bit heavier than some of my relatives. Luckily I'm old enough now that I really don't care what others say, think, or feel about my body. It's mine. I live with it and I love it. Those who have an opinion can either keep it to themselves or kiss myy ass!

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      YES! So great! You sound so powerful and confident Charity. It's so refreshing to hear.

      Hell yeah- love your body all up, always.

      Thank you for your voice, it makes mine stronger.

      Janne

    • Scarlett says:

      Yeah…I'm 5'6 I weigh 140 and I'm constantly badgered for being too thin. Want to weigh about160

  9. kate says:

    This this 1000 times this!!! I am 5'5" and 100 lbs. I have not reached acceptance, let alone love, of my body. But I am trying. Thank you for this.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Well in the meantime I am going to love all 100 lbs and 5"5 of you.

      It helped me love my body being naked. I used to feel uncomfortable naked… so I started to sleep naked, spend time in front of the mirror naked, do yoga naked. I got vulnerable with my naked body, loving it all up. It helped my confidence and sex life. A small suggestion from my own journey to yours.

      Thanks for writing me Kate!

      with warmth,

      Janne

  10. JessC says:

    Thank you for sharing!! I am also a tiny gal, 5'4 and weight fluctuates between 108 and 111. I go back and forth all the time thinking I need to put on some pounds and I've tried everything except eating McDonald's everyday. For me it's not about packing on the pounds by any means possible but feeling good inside and out. I'm small, I'll probably always be small and self love and acceptance are key. So thank you!

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Jess,

      This made me smile as when I was fourteen I worked at Mcdonalds for a year or so and ate it a few times a day- horrendous amounts. My small ass stayed the same.

      "It''s not about packing on the pound by any means possible but feeling good inside and out."

      You got it girl- you are already there. Loving your voice.

      warmly,

      Janne

  11. Bryan Reeves says:

    How about for our skinny brothers, too!!

    I also was teased a lot growing up for being skinny. Even as an adult people would tell me I need to eat more. I simply felt healthy. As a culture, we value bigger is better, supersize everything: our homes, our food, our muscles, our market, our wallets, our reach, etc. except our women. We don't like supersized women. But don't be too skinny, either. You ladies just can't win in this insane setup.

    As a man, being called skinny was just another way of being emasculated, as if I wasn't physically big enough to warrant my masculinity. Craziness all of it. Great article.

    Cheers to the skinny people. And the fat ones, too, and everyone in between. We're all too sexy for our shirts … and this insanity!

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      To sweet, sweet Bryan.

      You are the very definition of all things masculine should be, in my eyes- with your open hearted vulnerability, strong voice, grace and confidence. I think you are in the top 10% of men who walk this planet.

      I am sorry to making this not inclusive to men- I did try but somehow it didn't fit with my own personal experiences.

      Loving your skinny ass,

      Janne

    • elephantjournal says:

      Bryan, you should contribute your own story! It's true, this affects men so much, too—fat, weak, skinny, short—we've heard it all. http://www.elephantjournal.com/submit

  12. Kate says:

    Who is throwing skinny women under the bus? No one. Literally. No one.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Kate,

      I am not sure you read the article. I was inspired to write this after a woman commented on a photograph of myself in an article I wrote this month saying, “Wouldn’t it be even better if the picture were of a person more realistic? This size zero blow dried super tan model just turns me right off the content.”

      I have dealt with harassment, verbal abuse, bullying, judgments, assumptions, and jokes at the expense of my weight my entire life. I listed above ^^^^ some examples.

      I wrote this to speak out against harassment to skinny women but the big picture was about body image and our world- and learning to love our bodies regardless of our waist size. The article was about self acceptance and love and our divinity taking precedence over our exteriors.

      I am a skinny women, and I have had people try and throw me under the bus. This article was my raising my hand to speak about it.

      Janne

    • Melina says:

      People definitely throw skinny women under the bus. Probably the only ones that would know this are skinny girls and trust me, as one, I can assure you this is surely the case. Women I don't even know seemed to think it was acceptable to make critical comments about my weight. I don't walk up to people and comment on their weight when they are overweight, underweight or otherwise. It is simply rude and injurious to their body images to do this.

      • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

        Yes it is! Let people know. Speak sister.

        Some people truly have no idea. I served a table last night at an oyster bar and a man and his wife and another couple made a comment about me "not eating" (the day I published the article) and I wrote the link down for them ;) I also told them I had a fast metabolism and one of them admitted their daughter is a rail and also gets bullied- they apologized after. People don't always think with their hearts before they speak. Thanks for your voice Melina!

    • Mindy says:

      Have you not seen countless memes and pictures being posted all the time on Facebook? "Real women have curves, only dogs go for bones." Or the pictures of skinny actresses on top, and somewhat curvy, classic actresses like Marilyn Monroe on the bottom saying: "When did THIS become more sexy/attractive than THIS?"
      There is judgment and name calling on all sides of the spectrum. The point of this article is that some women are a size zero, and they are just as beautiful as any other woman. We are all beautiful.
      Wonderful article!

      • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

        Yes!

        So true. I like those articles in a way- because in my own eyes it is someone standing up and saying, "All bodies are beautiful. My tush is marvelous." The media does spend too much time on skinny. But they also do throw skinny under the bus so I feel mixed. Raw beauty talks is a company I really enjoy. They have women photographed without makeup and interviewed. They posted a photograph on instagram a few weeks ago of a man holding a sign saying "The definition of beautiful does not require the word skinny". I understood their point but still went "HEY!" at it. We all be on the bus, man. I started to write this article then.

        We are all saying the same thing in different languages. We are all beautiful indeed.

        Thank you Mindy..

    • elephantjournal says:

      I think you literally mean "figuratively." ;) Especially, and hopefully, when it comes to the bus? :) Seriously, I do think there’s a lot of rhetoric, some on elephant, much in our culture, about “real” women not being model-thin. For further relephant reading, see this image and read this article, if curious: http://www.elephantjournal.com/2012/01/can-we-ret

      Yours,

      Way
      ~
      Waylon Lewis
      Walk the Talk Show, elephantjournal.com
      8 million readers/month, 1st in #green twice nationally on twitter, Awards
      “Straight cash, homey.” ~ Rumi

    • alex says:

      clearly, you have never been bullied for being what people label as skinny. I was, at a certain point in my life, a double zero. No amount of food would make me gain weight, it was just the way my body was. I have gained weight as the years go by, but still remember the "no boobs, skinny legs, eat a hamburger comments", and still get the "remember when you were skinny? you are getting chubby. enjoying those chips?" when in reality i am as healthy as any 25 year old can be, "proportionate" height/weight, active lifestyle, healthy food choices. the fact that you have never gone through it doesn't mean it does not exist. you are ignorant to this issue, therefore you shouldn't contradict the author's comments. Bullying someone about their weight is WRONG, regardless of what number is on the scale.

      i really hope that you never get teased about your appearance, so that you never have to feel the self doubt and self loathe many of us work so hard to overcome. and if you have been teased already, please be a little more empathetic, don't let your ignorance get the best of you.

      • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

        Thank you for your feist my skinny sista!

        Thank you for your vigor, support and voice.

        with love,

        Janne

    • Katie says:

      People do make fun of skinny women. I've been called "twig" and "stick" throughout my teen and adult life. Every time I go out to eat with someone, who is bigger than me, and I get a doggy bag for my food (or if I start with a smaller portion), a comment is made ("no wonder you're so skinny") in a snide voice. There are memes and blogs all devoted to telling skinny women they aren't "real" because they don't have curves.

      No body should be made fun of because of there looks. Skinny or thin.

  13. @DrTMarshall says:

    Excellent article Janne! Beautifully written and eloquently expressed! Loved it.

    I could sooo relate, and being a fellow skinny sentient being was always trying to put on some weight…as guys are just as much as affected as you beautiful, skinny girls. :) With the billion dollar, weight-loss, fat-burning industry and its prevalence in the media – many people are striving to be thinner these days, though if you go a touch too thin (ala Tara Stiles for example), or for myself at times – you immediately engage a full-on critique by those who believe you have something wrong with you.

    It's quite frankly looney tunes, and a mix of contradictions – and what's really crazy is, you're fantastically beautiful (from head to toe)….and have a beautiful womanly figure. Though, you already know that! …just thought I would reinforce that one more time.

    Anyhow, your article really hits the nail on the head, in a big way!!

    It will undoubtedly help a great many people (and already has, I'm sure), who like us…lived in a shadow of doubt, and wavering self-love and acceptance – who will see this as a blessing, and their beautiful skinny-ness in the light it deserves. :)

    Warmly,
    Tim

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Tim,

      Thank you for writing me. I so wish I could of written this to be inclusive to all fellow skinny beings- I am glad that it spoke to you in some way even though I spoke mainly to a female demographic.

      The goal is for us to toss aside our exteriors and get our love on for our souls- but also be comfortable in our skin. No room for self doubt or wavering self love and acceptance. Thank you for all your words, they all resonate so. I am both flattered and grateful!

      warmly,

      Janne

      • @DrTMarshall says:

        Hi Janne,

        Thank you for your kind, supportive, and positive words. I agree, there is no room for self doubt or wavering self love.

        Excellent article, and thank you for taking the time to reply. You're awesome!

        My best,
        Tim

  14. Lora says:

    Great article! I've been skinny my whole life and I'm in my 50's. I marvel when someone thinks it's okay to say to me, "Have you lost weight?" using a tone that reflects it is not okay if I have. I would never say to someone, "Have you gained weight?"

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      It's a silly world we live in sometimes. I hope to open a few minds with this- thanks for your voice sista.

      Janne

  15. Laura says:

    Thank you! I'm 35 and weigh 95, I've had similar experiences.
    Skinny women are not sick, we are just skinny! We are just little!
    Have a nice a life!

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Your message made me smile. Yes! We are just little- and so stinking wonderful in our littleness.

      warmly,

      Janne

  16. Cindy says:

    YES! Thank you for this! At 5'3 and 99 lbs. I'm considered pretty little. Either they think your anorexic, a meth addict or you have cancer. Nope, just physically fit with a turbo metabolism. If we could all just drop the veil of judgement and see the soul of humanity in each individual this world would be a better place. It's really that simple.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      YES! to you. So wonderful. Here's to seeing more souls, and less shells. (But still loving our shells nonetheless).

      warmly,

      Janne

  17. cynthia D says:

    This is amazing!! And so needed – this is literally the first article I’ve read that sums up what I’ve been experiencing and feeling MY WHOLE DAMN SKINNY LIFE. It’s such a shame that this is ONLY the first article I’ve been able to find, but maybe this is only the beginning!?! I hope so. Such gratitude to you, for starting this conversation, and helping me and others feel less alone.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Cynthia,

      I wish I would of had a place of relatibility to lie my heavy heart upon growing up. I so hear you. I am also unsure why no one speaks out about this- I hope that I hear many, many more voices on the issue. Thank you for yours.

      warmly,

      Janne

  18. Cindy says:

    Well. said.

    I tried to gain weight for years, until it crept on naturally as I entered my forties. The 'best' one came from a 'friend' who said, as we were bemoaning the plights of being thirty and single 'you don't have any problems in life: you're skinny'. Me: …..?? What do you say to that? Sigh.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Cindy.

      Yesh. Well here's to hoping we pull ourselves together and recognize our brilliance as something other than our waist size. Skinny girls have single issues too ;)

      Thank you for taking the time to write me!

      Janne

  19. Kristen Arnett of GreenBeautyTeam.com says:

    THANK YOU!!! I have often said very similar things to people privately – so thank you for putting all of this wonderfulness together in one, well written article about true inclusivity, acceptance and in perspective that we are just flesh and bones – the soul is what counts. There were so many highlights, and this in particular really resonated: "The solution is not to wonder how much she eats and if when she gets up to pee halfway through her meal if she is going to shove her finger down her throat in the company of a toilet." I still wonder if people who aren't my friends are thinking that when I leave a table. Sending you lots of good vibes for representing us naturally slender ladies (and men) so well!

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      This whole reply is so fantastic Kristen. Thank you!

      I have often thought that when I go to the bathroom- and it's an ugly, odd thought to have as I have never counted a calorie, or shoved my fingers down my throat. We must be so careful with what we let leak into our brains. I contemplated deleting that sentence when editing- I am glad it stayed, just for you.

      with warmth,

      Janne

  20. Zoe says:

    Thanks for writing this, this is fabulous.

  21. Michele says:

    I appreciate this article, and yet am frustrated by multiple comments. Each and every one of us has a natural body size and should not be discouraged by it. Posting your height and weight will only discourage those that do struggle with eating disorders. If you truly want to be appreciated outisde of your height and weight, don't publisise it.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Michele,

      Thanks for taking the time to reply. Perhaps they weren't speaking about their weights to shove anyones face into it or be represented by it but just to say, "I'm skinny too." To be seen, heard and bring a voice to the issue. I am grateful for theirs and yours.

      warmly,

      Janne

  22. Lexus says:

    well said – thanks for representing us skinny ones & the comments we receive on a daily basis. Which are totally bullying! Highlighting the illusion that happiness is skinny is the pearl here! much love & respect to you xx

  23. Nancy says:

    I don't think you have a skinny ass, I think it looks great!

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Ha! Awesome. You're right–my ass has more body than the rest of me. Thanks for noticing ;)

  24. Jemma says:

    Love you writing, very inspiring :-)

  25. Lisa P says:

    'Bout time, Janne Robinson, someone put this in words! Thank you x

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      It felt so good to release these words into the light!

      Here's to more skinny people standing up too- especially for the young ones.

      Thanks Lisa.

  26. jemandtaz says:

    Also if you get chance can you let me know what brand your clothing is that your wearing in that picture of you stretching. it's beautiful and i'd like to see if i can get it in the uk. SUPER FLATTERING!! :-)

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Jem!

      Are you meaning my bikini or tank top?

      I bought those bikini bottoms in Costa Rica. A local woman makes them in Santa Teresa. If you look up Don Johns hostel on facebook and message him he knows the woman who makes them and can put you in contact :)

      happy hunting- although I am sure your tush looks great with or without flattering bottems. ;)

      Janne

      • jemandtaz says:

        Thanks Janne I will try to hunt down this woman and try to sort a bikini from her :-)
        Ha ha my tush is a tad larger but I'm going to try and pull it off anyway!! :-) I so love love love your blog, Jemma

        • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

          I actually had those bottoms taken in because they were too big!! They will be perfect for you ;) If you find Don John on facebook they will connect you! Promise. He is a big promotor of her stuff as she is local.

          Love,

          Janne

  27. Shell says:

    I’m curious–who ever told you that you have a small or skinny ass? Because if that picture is truly of you in the bikini and hands above your head, girl it looks (to me) like you do not! I am 5’5″ and 135 and for the most part love my body (work in progress), and I would LOVE to have that juicy ass you have!! Were you born with that too or did that come from exercise?

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Shell,

      Way to make a girl blush all over! I exercise through yoga and hiking. But not overly so. I want to say I was born with it- but it could be a bit of both. I haven't ever gave my ass much thought or love- this article is making it's head swell ;)

      warmly,

      Janne

  28. Melinda W. says:

    I am certain I could read this every day for the rest of my life. Though, even after reading it once, I felt empowered…as I am sure many other readers did as well. THANK YOU for this.

  29. thenicolemarie says:

    I am so grateful that someone is speaking out for ALL body types, but particularly the skinny girls. I can relate with every single sentiment and I absolutely agree that we need to start loving each other in EVERY form. I've often kept quiet about my struggle with body image, too, because I've had friends respond in ways that are less than sympathetic because I'm "not allowed" to feel that way – when in reality, I have been bullied and made to feel insecure about my body my entire life. I've been asked if I'm on drugs, have an eating disorder and have had grown women make sounds that my body must be disgusting. To this day, I won't go to the bathroom in a public place in the middle of a meal out of fear that people assume I'm throwing up. I cannot believe I'm not alone in that!

    Thank you so much for your words of empowerment – here's to the thin girls!!!!!!!!

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Nicole,

      Thank you for taking the time to write me and share your side of this struggle. It feels so good to know we are not alone in our journey and battle. I truthfully have never said out loud to anyone that I secretly fear others thinking I am throwing up when I pee mid meal- this was the first time I wrote about it and released it. Glad I wrote that line- I think it resonated with many.

      I love your skinny body all up- and your beautiful fiest, thank you belle!

      Janne

  30. Sara Elle says:

    This made me cry. Thank you… <3

  31. Yogi Food says:

    Gotta tell ya- if that's your ass posted for the world to see in the pic above, it ain't skinny, it's quite round! I mean this in the nicest possible way~

  32. @wingzfly says:

    Janne, I am a photographer who regularly shoots editorial and fashion shoots in New York City and I absolutely love your article. I can't count the number of times that people have told models that I've been in the middle of shooting with on the streets of New York that "skinny ain't pretty." So many people assume that all models are anorexic or bulimic. They assume those girls never eat. And, probably worst of all, they assume that those models are their enemies.

    I can't speak for all models, but I can definitely speak for the girls I've watched devour an entire meal and then dive into a dessert after a photo shoot. I've known models that work hard to stay fit so they can eat what they want when they want and still keep doing the job they are paid to do. And I've seen those same models look at pictures of other women and tell them how gorgeous THEY are.

    Skinny women are not the enemy. They aren't there to make you feel bad about yourself or to talk badly about you. They are working, living, loving, and doing all the things that you do and trying to make the most of their lives. I haven't met one that's actively trying to make non-thin women feel worse about themselves.

    It gets exhausting trying to correct someone every time they post something like, "She needs a cheeseburger," under a picture from a shoot I've done, but I do it anyway because I hope that, next time, that person will think twice before making a comment like that. Most people don't realize they're being hurtful or bullying, but they are, and I love that this piece you wrote really cuts to the quick of that. I'm glad a friend shared this fantastic piece with me and I will share it with everyone I know! You've got a new subscriber! :)

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Good evening!

      Thank you for sharing your experience within the model world and also from a male looking in. But above all, thank you for standing up for the sisters you walk beside and having there skinny backs.

      "skinny women are not the enemy" Amen.

      so very grateful for your voice & you are my first subscriber I have knowledge of- so that's flattering ;)

      with warmth,

      Janne

  33. Courtney says:

    I am astonished by the praise for this article, and I’m probably going to be chastised for saying this, but how dare you? I’m morbidly obese and would LOVE one day to not stress incessantly about what I put in my mouth. Or if I want a serving size of ice cream, to not see the horrible looks of those judging. I worry about belly bulges and double chins. If it’s even a degree hotter than 68 I’m miserable. So how dare you complain when there are others of us that look upon you saying, “why I couldn’t I have born with those genes?”

    • Lys says:

      Hi, Courtney!

      I'm fat. I currently weigh around 350 pounds. At my peak weight I was 500 pounds. I tell you that so you know where I'm coming from.

      I believe that she has every right to complain, and let me explain why. You see, whether we are big or small, fat or skinny, dealing with collarbones or belly bulges, no one…NO ONE…has the right to shame us for our body types. It is just as stressful for her and those like her, I have no doubt, to always be criticized for being too skinny as it is for someone to be criticized for being too fat.

      Those of us who want everybody…meaning every body….to be accepted need to work together to achieve that goal. That means that ANY body criticism needs to stop, no matter what kind it is.

      The thing is that she is beautiful, and you are beautiful, and I am beautiful! Our bodies are amazing. They breathe in and out, the blood runs through our veins, our brains work and our eyes blink. Our bodies do all of these things without us even having to try and MAKE them happen consciously. Isn't that awesome? We, as human beings, need to stop focusing on all the things that society has branded as 'wrong', and focus on what is 'right', and 'right' is who we are. Now. This moment. That person may change in a minute, or a day, or an hour, or a year, but that person will be 'right' as well.

      Don't be angry with her for putting her feelings out there. They are valid feelings, just as your feelings are valid for you. Her feelings don't invalidate yours in any way. Empathize with her, because you're both dealing with two sides of the exact same coin, and if we're ever going to melt that coin down and remove it from our world, we have to do so together, not fighting one another.

      Thanks for listening. :)

      • Randi says:

        Now I am feeling the love and compassion I came searching for. Thanks you, Lys.

      • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

        Hi Lys,

        I love everything that you wrote. Except this wasn't meant to be a complaint, it was an outcry at harassment and a stand for others who have struggled or are struggling with self love and acceptance in the midst of low blows on their weight.

        Thanks for sharing your juicy soul with us- I love what you have to say.

        Janne

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Courtney,

      I dared to write this for countless reasons. I was bullied when I was younger. I ate my lunch in the bathroom, shoved tissue in my braw and fantasized about what boobs and curves would feel like. What if a young girl or boy in junior high struggling with self esteem and harassment finds my words?

      This is not me complaining–more so shedding light on both sides of bullying with body image that occurs. The whole point of this article was to love ourselves regardless of something as trivial as our waist size. Underneath it all- I've got the same thing that you do. A soul and a red beating heart.

      Can you hear that and step over the rest?

      warmly,

      Janne

  34. Lys says:

    Speaking as a Fat Lady, I think you are beautiful. I'm so tired of people feeling the need to criticize others for their body shape, whether skinny or fat or anything in between. I don't let it pass when people say, "She needs to put down the cheeseburgers and walk a couple of miles.", and I don't let it pass when people say, "She needs a pork chop or ten." Both are equally as rude and, quite frankly, no one else's business.

    Keep on enjoying life, whatever shape it takes. I'll be right there next to you with my round self! :)

  35. Hilda S. says:

    Hi! i just read your article and i ilove it i,m size cero too since i can remember, i almost cry reading this because im identified , i lived thouthg the same things, i tryied to go for that numbers that i have never reach, its the same story that happened to me , people dont know that we ,the "skinny ",cry because they laugh and make jokes of us like with the over size people, and the way you put it on words just full me, thank you for wrote this i send you lots of love from Costa Rica.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      I am so glad my words filled your heart to a point of tears you resilient, feisty, beautiful, skinny soul!

      Thank you for your voice, it makes mine stronger. Pura Vida my sister- loving you back.

      Janne

  36. max says:

    I'm calling BS on this one. There is a HUGE difference between fat and skinny shaming. Yes there are memes about "skinny girls not being real women" but all of the skinny shaming comes out of jealousy and envy. NOBODY is ever jealous or envious of a fat person. So even if a skinny woman is shamed for their size its never because they are seen as disgusting to the general public its because they are what society considers an ideal body type and it is a tactic to cut them down out of jealousy. I am a man. I am in great shape now. I use to be overweight and I have also been very thin and I can tell you any comments people made to me about being "too thin" were NOTHING compared to the comments shaming me for being fat. You have no idea unless you have been there and back. So I'm sorry…this whole thing with people whining about "skinny shaming" is complete and utter BS. I'm not saying its nice to put anyone down. Am I condoning shaming anyone? no….however when a thin person is shamed its out of jealousy. When a fat person is shamed its because society and people in general look at them as subhuman and disgusting. No matter how you slice it a thin person will ALWAYS be privileged and have advantaged because of the way they look. Its like a rich person bitching because people are making fun of them for having too much money. Its absurd. Thin people have major advantages in life. Get over it.

    • Elizabeth says:

      So….because some may perceive me as being at an advantage due to my appearance, I should just smile and nod if strangers accuse me of being a drug addict and tell me I'm not a real woman and that my body is disgusting? At 32 years old, I'm over it, but as a self-conscious, gawky teenager, I feared being seen in a bathing suit or shorts because I knew people would think it was cute and appropriate to make hateful comments about my awkward body. Oh, but it's cool, because they were just jealous.

      • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

        No–Fuck no Elizabeth.

        I want you to stand in your power, your brilliance, your worth, your truth and knock inappropriate, abusive, judgemental opinions out of the ballpark with your ferocious might.

        I've got your back, sister.

        Janne

    • Mel says:

      Is it envy if a man is the one telling women that they're not a real woman because they're too skinny? Because when a man is telling me I don't measure up as a women due to my lack of double d's, I'm pretty sure I'm just getting the same old "you're less than a human and gross to look at" message that fat people get. That's pretty hard to get over.

      • bex0r says:

        The difference is that as a culture and social system, there are constant messages being sent that fat is bad, fat people are lazy, stupid, sloppy, and less worthy of love and respect than thin people. You might experience some discomfort on a personal, individual level, but you are not being constantly and systematically discriminated against due to your body type. I'm not saying skinny people don't get teased (I was teased mercilessly as a pre-teen and through school for being thin) but we experience a minute fraction of the discomfort and discrimination that fat people do.

        • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

          Yes, I agree.

          I'm not saying skinny is riding on top of the bus or in first class, we're all on the bus. This isn't about who get's more flack and who is more worthy of speaking out against harassment. We are all worthy of sticking our hands up and saying, "Hey, that doesn't feel nice. Zip it jack-ass." I want us all to sit on the bus together and have each other's backs, beat of society norms of "real woman".

          I want the size zero's to know they are not meant to cower over and take abuse because they are "more privileged" therefore there voices are irrelevant.

          Janne

          • bex0r says:

            Definitely agree and you should feel empowered and supported to know that you do not need to take abuse due to your thin privilege. Guilt and shame does not achieve anything. You acknowledge this privilege exists so that's the first step. You're right, we are all on the bus together, so while you're feeling proud of your body and your shape and empowered in that, remember to bring along with you all those who maybe don't feel the love, be they fat, average, old, young, red, white, black, or whatever. No one gets higher by oppressing or putting down others, so while you big up your skinny girls, remember to acknowledge those who don't necessarily benefit from being a part of that group. Then you are using your thin privilege to best effect.

      • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

        Mel,

        Any man who judges your womanhood by your breast cups hasn't spent much time acquainting himself with the divine fem. Your brilliance doesn't fit inside a Double D.

        Speak up– thank you for your voice.

        with warmth and might,

        Janne

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Max,

      Shaming is shaming. Bullying is Bullying. In your reply I hear you holding on, with much fire to the "fat" and "skinny". I would like to revisit that although this article IS about body image and verbal abuse that slips by without a slap on the wrist for the skinnies, this article was at the core of it all about the inside bit. It isn't about wether skinny people are bullied more, or fat people. It isn't about wether as a size zero I put up with less than a size 8- it's all completely irrelevant.

      My words are about irrepressible self love and acceptance of the bit that counts- so unless you can squish someones brilliance, and their soul in some jeans, this argument isn't worth your energy or mine.

      Thank you for your voice,

      Janne

  37. dee says:

    Lassie, it's bollocks, not bollux.

  38. Shannon says:

    Thank you so much for this. Im a size 3 im almost 21 and I get told by my family and friends im to skinny. My sister looks at me like I do crack but I dont I cant help my body. My family thinks I dont eat. I eat like a horse. Im a person not just a skinny bitch that has problems. Im a normal girl. Im not that active. But I do walk places and eat right when im not eating horrible food. I needed to hear this Ive always been secure about my weight. Now I feel like im beautiful. Thank you so much.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Shannon,

      Thank you for your voice. Thank you for standing in the light with me on this issue. Sounds like your family could benefit in reading these words, or having a discussion on it. They should be the ones having your back at the end of a weary day. Skinny is beautiful. Fat is beautiful. And everywhere in between is also beautiful.

      I hear you, I see you, I've got your back.

      Love,

      Janne

  39. Randi says:

    Unfortunately, I’m not receiving the love you say we need more of. I agree. We need both love and compassion for one another. It must be lost somewhere in this rant. I do hear that you feel unseen and you suffer. As we all do… hoping you get all you need.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Randi,

      I think we could douse our world with love so many times a day we would be drowning in it and then we could wait a moment and add more. We all need love and compassion. The words above are not meant to be a rant- but awareness in an issue needing light in our world and society. I am glad I spoke out about it and have opened the doorway for others to speak of their suffering, harassment and journey within our world.

      I feel very, very seen.

      Thank you for your voice,

      Janne

  40. Jackie says:

    This. Because even though ‘I’ am not skinny, all 5 of my kids are. My daughter is 10 and wears a little kids size 8 to fit her in the waist, but for pants she needs a girls 14slim to be long enough. She’s already been deemed a ‘stick’ by her friends. She is active and eats well. Alot has to do with genetics. I hate hearing from people that I should feed my kids. I do. They eat like crazy. But they also burn it off like crazy. From a mom that’s hoping to teach her kids that there’s more to life than the size of your body, your skinny, healthy ass is marvelous. Lol. Thank you ;)

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Jackie,

      You go momma grizz on those people calling her "stick". I hope that she can read these words and know she is not alone. And I hope that you can spend time assuring her that taking those comments with a light heart isn't how she has to take it. She can stand up and say, "HEY!" whenever she wants. She has a right as human being to not take harassment. We all do. Love to you, thank you for your voice and strength for her journey in this sometimes harsh world!

      Janne

  41. bex0r says:

    I hear your words about your struggle and empathize with it. I too, am on the thin side, always have been, but the difference is that I recognize that we live in a world that gives people with bodies like mine (and yours) certain privileges that it does not give to overweight ones. It's because of these privileges that calls to "begin stepping over body image" ring a bit hollow. You haven't lived the experience of an overweight person, so asking them to discard their hang-ups and baggage about their size seems a bit ignorant. Like people who claim not to "see color" and that in order to "get over" racism, we should stop talking about race issues, it's not simply enough to just focus on love. We must actively start dismantling the systemic causes of body dismorphia, which starts with acknowledging your privilege as a thin person – not defending it.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi!

      I read your words with understanding and I relate, there is truth ringing. However if other people make a choice to treat myself, or you, or another by their weight that is their choice- not my own. I have no accountability over the way people may treat me. I get to exist as I am and live my life and progress, evolve and grow and deal with the people I cross paths with.

      I don't view my waist size as a "get out of jail free card" or a "pass go and collect 200 dollars because your skinny" card. I just see it as part of my exterior. I didn't show up while being created and choose what my measurements were. If someone deems me "privileged" as a size zero that is their own opinion and shit to deal with. I feel privileged to just walk upon this earth in the company of all the other magnificent souls, and I demand of the world to stop imposing judgment or shame on me all the same as someone who isn't a size zero. (we're all on the bus, remember?)

      No where in my article did I ask an overweight person to discard their hang ups or baggage about their size. If you view existing as a size zero a privilege or a reason to lie down and take harassment that is your opinion, and how you see the world. I do not agree, and I will not lie down and accept harassment or bullying on my size.

      thank you for your voice,

      Janne Robinson

  42. noble hobbit says:

    been on both sides, was super active healthy skinny in my early 20's, now pleasantly plump in my mid 30's (post baby).
    I received negative comments about my body at both weights. all I can say is that the people negatively commenting on the bodies of others must be pretty unhappy in theirs. its a sad commentary on our society when there are much greater issues at hand in this world. great article :)

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Hobbit,

      We are a mirror for our world. When we exist within red and insecurity we see red and reason to be insecure in this world. I agree 100% with you. Thank you for your voice,

      Golem.

  43. Josie says:

    Thank you! I'm naturally skinny, and seem to have the same active/not active lifestyle as you. I had a woman approach me in the mall when I was a teen and asked me to please eat a sandwich. I will never forget that. Fat or skinny, mean comments hurts both ways. People seem to forget that.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Josie,

      Thank you for your voice. Writing this has been incredible for me as it reminded me that I am not alone. There are hundreds and probably thousands of people who have been told to "eat a sandwich". Comments do hurt both ways- it's my job, and your job to remind people of that, however uncomfortable it may be.

      Strength to you my skinny sister,

      Janne

  44. Ariel says:

    I think this piece does a really great job of highlighting the fact that all women- all people for that matter- are vulnerable to feeling insecure about their body and that body-shaming of any kind- whether it be because one's body is "too" "fat" or "too skinny" or "too/not curvy", etc. is unacceptable and that people of all sizes are celebrated. That said, I think it's important to acknowledge that "skinny" people, despite the rude comments they receive from people or the insecurities they may have about their appearance, nevertheless occupy a position of privilege in that society- magazines, tv shows, advertisements, clothing stores, etc- tells us that that kind of body (however modified) is the ideal and the only definition of beauty and health. Ashley Solomon at Nourishing the Soul puts it nicely re: the fact that not all bodies are shamed equally:

    "Perhaps I’m splitting hairs here, or playing right into the Pain Olympics (Waaa! We have it worse!). But I think that this statement is 100% untrue. To me, it’s like a white person saying, 'I want you to know that I am just as prejudiced against as a black person.' I just don’t buy it…..Everything that I know from reading countless research studies, following the HAES movement, working with patients across the full weight spectrum, and living as a person in a weight-focused world tells me that fat people have it worse. Period. Larger folks are shamed at nearly every turn – in the workplace, at the grocery store, on the internet, at restaurants, on the playground, in the voting booths, and in their own families, as a start. While perhaps (and I say that tentatively), the comments are more underground when it comes to people we consider overweight or obese, the effects (in salary, opportunities, respect, etc.) are profound. I think it’s important that we take a cold, hard look at the discrimination happening against larger people. We have to recognize privilege as it exists, or we are doomed to live blind and biased. That’s all. Now that I’ve stated that fat people have it worse, I recognize that it’s not all that helpful to pit one side against the other, and that’s not what I mean to do. Really. It doesn’t make what’s happening to [skinny women] better. I just think that making the comparison doesn’t have to be part of her argument. This actually shouldn’t be a battle of who is more shamed, because the real victims here are women in general. When fat people or thin people are shamed for their weight, we are all hurt. If we grow up fearing being anywhere but in the dead center of the weight spectrum, we perpetuate the stigmatization and we become terrified of letting our bodies find their natural rhythm."
    http://www.nourishing-the-soul.com/2012/05/are-sk

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Ariel,

      Interesting article. I have to say I don't agree with all she said. I squished my face up in confusion and anger and said, "Fuck that" outloud in the face I am sitting in. Excuse the language. What I DID enjoy was that " this actually shouldn't be a battle of who is more shamed because the real victim here is women in general." That rings true. And not just all women, all human beings. Although I didn't speak to a male demorgraphic with my article- I hear you men, I've got you in my heart too.

      The issue I had and the swear inducing part of her and your for that matter comment is the "privilege" part. I would like to take the sentence "thin women occupy a position of privilege in our society" and run it over a few times, back and forth with my ferocious, mighty heart.

      If someone decides to see another as "privileged" because of their waist size that is their choice- not my own. I have no accountability over the way people may treat me. I get to exist as I am and live my life and progress, evolve and grow and deal with the people I cross paths with.

      I don't view my waist size as a "get out of jail free card" or a "pass go and collect 200 dollars because your skinny" card. I just see it as part of my exterior. I didn't show up while being created and choose what my measurements were. If someone deems me "privileged" as a size zero that is their own opinion and shit to deal with. I feel privileged to just walk upon this earth in the company of all the other magnificent souls, and I demand of the world to stop imposing judgment or shame on me all the same as someone who isn't a size zero.

      I appreciate your voice, and I hear you.

      Janne

  45. Ashley Paige says:

    Amen. The thing that gets me is you arent THAT tiny. Im 5x smaller than you, so to me, your body is beautiful and you’ve got some meat on your bones! I’ve dealt with the same my entire life. I also speak up now, for myself and other, that I’ve gained some confidence back from the ongoing abuse. People do not realize that they are causing a lot of damage. They don’t see it the same way as on overweight person. They wouldn’t have the nerve to say those things to an overweight person. Keep doing what you’re doing. We have to keep spreading awareness to stop the bullying. <3

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Ashley,

      It astounds me that people don't see it as the same, because it is. It's abusive. I will keep on doing what I am doing and I implore you to speak out against any outrageous opinions you collect in the future.

      Love and light,

      Janne Robinson

  46. I don't disagree with your overall opinion, but I would strongly like you to remember that while it sucks for all women, it still sucks way more for fat women. I say this as someone who has been considered both obese and underweight on the BMI scale, and who has stuck her finger down her throat (which you seem to be somewhat unaware that eating disorders have very little to do with being motivated by weight).

    Being comfortable or not comfortable in your body can happen to people at any weight; being systemically discriminated against by doctors, employers, and businesses is something that happens to fat people. They are by far and away the ones that are most hurt by our society's shitty attitudes towards women, and while I absolutely hate slogans like "real women have curves" because hell, you are a real woman even if you don't have curves! I also at the same time support them, because when there is systemic unfairness the correct approach is to correct for the group that is most hurt by the unfairness.

    Think about sexism. Sexism hurts men, too – a society that tells them they can't cry and their worth is based in masculinity is shitty. But the movement against sexism is called feminism because far and away women are the ones who are far more disadvantaged by the paradigm, and righting the wrongs against them is the primary concern.

    I completely understand where you're coming from, and I feel you. But honestly, we skinnies are not all that important right now. I hope for a world where no one comments on anyone's weight, ever. But while I get shitty off handed comments thrown by me at people who think anorexic is a compliment, it is nowhere near the discrimination and treatment that fat women get. I have severe body image issues, but I can get hired for a job more easily.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Hi Violet,

      I appreciate you taking the time to reply. So much of this I felt a YES! too, and also so much I don't agree with. Which is fine, we are all meant to speak and be heard and not always agree, right?

      I agree we can all be uncomfortable in our skin regardless of our waist size. We must work at self love and acceptance every damn day. I don't agree that anyone is "more hurt" by harassment, judgement and abusive comments. I think it hurts all woman to have media shove air brushed, glorified, thin women down our throats claiming a size zero is the key to happiness. I enjoy and support the "real woman have curves" photographs and articles as they are a stand against this. I don't like the term "real". I don't think defending "fat shaming" is any more or less important than "skinny shaming". I just want to run all shaming over with my equality bus.

      I am a equalist with a small dash of a feminist. I don't think the cure for sexism is throwing men under the bus. I think women have struggled for so long for equality so I understand strong feminists. My mother is a HUGE feminist. We all have a choice in how we react to sexism and people attempting to shame us on our body weight, regardless of our gender or size. We can hear something, let it roll off our backs and say, "meh, that's your shit." or we can also stand up and say, "hey that's your shit, and it doesn't sit well with my fabulous self!". Some days its worth the energy and some days it's not.

      I think us skinnies, and not skinnes ARE important now and everyday. I think it isn't talked about, and many women and men lack the ability to speak out about this harassment and I implore them to do so. I hope this article creates a space for people to acknowledge where they were wronged and didn't speak up, and that they do in the future.

      I also know lots of skinny people who are as charming as door knobs, and don't get hired for jobs. If an employer is hiring solely on someone's waist size- that is their choice, and you and I have no accountability over it. I hope they hire whoever fits their company and not just their preferred waist candy.

      Thank you for your voice, I see you.

      Janne

  47. This is so perfect. It's great to hear someone finally express all of these thoughts I've had in my head. Beautifully written.

  48. Lisa says:

    I’m sorry I don’t buy this. ..

    Not the every body should be happy with themselves theme. That is a given, of course that should be the case.

    But the poor me thin priviledge? Eh.

    I once had a girl who could eat everything and barely put on weight tell me it was as bad as my situation of smelling food and putting on weight.

    The difference is you see your body type almost EVERYWHERE classed as an ideal. I only see mine classed as an ideal on fetish websites.

    Get it?

    • Emily says:

      But, our everyday social lives and society is filled with "overweight" individuals. Thus, in our daily lives we are the ones (skrawny gals) who are criticized by the majority. We don't live surrounded by movie stars that reinforce our naturally skinny bodies, we live around individuals who are of average weight or are overweight that assume we are anorexic.

  49. Geneviève says:

    Same story for me. Whenever I get a passive-aggressive comment about how thin I am, I go for humour and tell people: I know, I chose my parents really well. :-)

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Har. I am glad you can reply with humor– I sometimes lack the ability to do so. I like to make light of something and also be stern while saying so.

      It takes a tremendous balance to be graceful when poked. You have it in mounds.

      Power to you skinny sister,

      Janne

  50. lara says:

    Thank you for this..just today I met a new woman that I was going to be working with. Me? I am thin, her? She was overweight. I don't care what a person's size is because my life sounds like yours. I have been picked on, and I care about a person, not their body.. Most overweight people I've met (which is a lot) think that for some reason skinny people don't get made fun so they need to "teach us a lesson" or something, idk. Well, this girl hated me, I felt it. She didn't acknowledge my presence, nothing..not until after I had to prove to her that I was a fun and happy person did that "hate" feeling go away..sigh. Anyway, thanks. When I read things like this, I don't feel so alone in this world with my struggles.

    • Janne Robinson jannerobinson says:

      Lara,

      It is strange that people can think shaming in any way, shape or form is okay. You are not alone- we're in this together. Power to you for knowing your value and worth and not just taking it.

      Love,

      Janne

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