The last time I saw you

You were standing there at the gate

Watching me walk away

I was trying to look cool like nostalgia in motion

That’s a difficult thing to pull off when you’re constantly looking back

You were smiling and waving like it was all gonna be alright

I secretly hated you for that

Everything in my being screamed at me to turn around

To run back to you

I wanted to take your hand in mine and pull you out of there

Like Wayne did with Cassandra…

Only I didn’t

Instead I looked over my shoulder once more

And swallowed the tightness in my throat

And ignored the whispered warnings sounding in my gut

They whispered things would never be the same again

They whispered that the “We” we were was dying

Going away forever

I dismissed these thoughts as sentimental weakness

The sloshy musings of an overdramatic youth

Never would’ve guessed my gut knew so much more than my thirsty brain

With its linear logic and high powered deductive reasoning

I told myself we’d be together again soon

I told myself you’d be the delirious quivering reward

For successful endurance of necessary suffering

Knowing somewhere deep down it wasn’t true

Knowing somewhere deep down the “We” we were

Now existed only in my fondest memories

Only in the dark moments I would occasionally indulge on the cool side of my pillow

I turned around

And walked out of your life.

.

Author: Matt Davis

Editor: Yoli Ramazzina

Photo: Flickr/John Atherton