About: Wendy Strgar
Posts by Wendy Strgar:
Growing Up Sexually.by Wendy Strgar on May 18, 2013 I have been making love with the same man for some 30 years, and although I can honestly say it has gotten amazingly and increasingly better over the decades, it is important to add that this improvement was in direct proportion to the work and willingness we brought to growing up sexually. 7,183 views |
Growing Up, Growing Older.by Wendy Strgar on May 10, 2013 “The only way that we can live is if we grow. The only way that we can grow is if we change. The only way that we can change is if we learn. The only way we can learn is if we are exposed. And the only way that we can become exposed is if [...] 512 views |
A Perennial Healing.by Wendy Strgar on May 4, 2013 “Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” ~ Carl Gustav Jung It is that time of year again, when the garden performs its ritual magic of re-creating itself anew. Regardless of the challenging and changeable winter weather conditions, the perennials in the garden re-emerge each spring, a blooming demonstration of what it means [...] 827 views |
Reclaiming the Garden of Our Sexual Soul.by Wendy Strgar on Apr 26, 2013 “The soul of sweet delight can never be defiled.” ~ William Blake We all have a sexual soul, or more accurately, a piece of our soul is reflected deeply in our sexuality. This sexual space that inhabits the deepest recesses of our consciousness is one of the most meaningful ways that we know ourselves, and, [...] 1,212 views |
Weeding the Relationship Garden.by Wendy Strgar on Apr 20, 2013 Source: thepaintedbench.tumblr.com via Michele on Pinterest “You must weed your mind as you would weed your garden.” ~Terri Guillemets I learned about weeds before I learned anything about gardens. For my 40th birthday my husband built me a beautiful, secure deer fence and I was told to use straw to augment and lighten the heavy [...] 1,317 views |
I am Grateful for the Pain of Transformation.by Wendy Strgar on Apr 12, 2013 “The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly.” ~ Richard Bach I recently learned that the transformation of the caterpillar to a butterfly isn’t just about the effort of spinning their cocoon. Once inside, [...] 1,011 views |
The Joys of Erotic Education.by Wendy Strgar on Apr 6, 2013 Source: gorgeouscompany.wordpress.com via Sasha on Pinterest “Conservatives say teaching sex education in the public schools will promote promiscuity. With our education system? If we promote promiscuity the same way we promote math or science, they’ve got nothing to worry about.” ~ Beverly Mickins Most of what matters and gets better in life happens [...] 2,783 views |
Embodying Erotica: Purr, Growl & Sex Talk.by Wendy Strgar on Mar 29, 2013 “Be no longer tender. Cover me with frenzied kisses—even as I would drench my body in the cruel torrents of the rain. Envelop me from throat to ankle in delirium intolerable….” ~ Blanche Shoemaker Wagstaff Accessing our deepest erotic selves can be as simple as tapping into the power of our own voice, exploring the [...] 2,303 views |
Stop the Cutting.by Wendy Strgar on Mar 15, 2013 Just recently in December of 2012, after 10 years of organizing and education, a United Nations resolution to end female circumcision worldwide was adopted by consensus of more than 100 nations, including 54 from Africa. 198 views |
 Forgoing Self-Rejection.by Wendy Strgar on Mar 1, 2013 Source: piliprud.blogspot.com via Michele on Pinterest “I know that when a door closes, it can feel like all doors are closing. A rejection letter can feel like everyone will reject us. But a closed door leads to clarity. It’s really an arrow. Because we cannot go through that door, we will go somewhere else. [...] 372 views |
 Offering Neutrality.by Wendy Strgar on Feb 22, 2013 Source: welovephoneography.com via June Dorothy on Pinterest “When in doubt who will win, be neutral.” ~ Swiss Proverb One of my husband’s most reliable responses to my often high level of emotionality is: “Can you just be neutral?” He is a psychiatrist, so he has a lot more practice at finding a neutral objective view. [...] 289 views |
 Unlearning Useless Lessons.by Wendy Strgar on Feb 15, 2013 “Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.” ~ William James Most people would probably agree that if all they needed to remember about giving and receiving love, what they learned in kindergarten, they might also add the caveat that most of what they need [...] 239 views |
For Love or Money.by Wendy Strgar on Feb 8, 2013 “Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.” ~ The Dalai Lama XIV It is an odd and painful irony that often just as things are really coming together successfully in life, we often lose touch with the love that had inspired us to get there. We [...] 90 views |
 The Beauty of Waking Up.by Wendy Strgar on Feb 1, 2013 Source: localmilk.tumblr.com via Sherrie on Pinterest “One day a monk spoke bitterly to the Buddha. All he wanted to talk about was the unbearable sorrows of the world. The Buddha remained silent while the monk talked, then a faint smile appeared on his face. He pointed to the ground below his feet and said,“On this earth I [...] 531 views |
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 Rethinking Our Fear.by Wendy Strgar on Jan 19, 2013 “There is nothing to fear but fear itself.” ~ Franklin Roosevelt Insecurity is a natural consequence of our mortal human experience. The most primal hardwired function of our brain is driven by a survival instinct, which is governed, to a large extent, by a negativity bias that operates without our conscious awareness. Negativity bias creates thinking [...] 849 views |
 Pleasure Medicine.by Wendy Strgar on Jan 11, 2013 The New Year is a good time to re-orient our experience of pleasure. It’s easy to confuse the continuous onslaught of instant gratification that our culture gorges on, with the deep healing experience of pleasure. Here are a couple of guideposts to help distinguish and navigate oneself towards the healing experience of real pleasure. True [...] 883 views |
 Healing Our Families.by Wendy Strgar on Dec 29, 2012 “Forgiveness is the final form of love.” ~ Reinhold Niebuhr Not long ago at a conference, a woman I was sitting with was saying how happy she is to have no contact with her children. These comments are not unusual. In fact, according to Dr. Josh Coleman, author of When Parents Hurt, the phenomenon of complete [...] 466 views |
 Healing Sex.by Wendy Strgar on Dec 14, 2012 “Eventually you will come to understand that love heals everything, and love is all there is.” ~ Gary Zukav The other day, I got a note from a loyal customer who shared the unfortunate story of her husband’s poorly executed penile implant that left him both significantly shorter and with erectile issues. Her request that I [...] 1,843 views |
 5 Easy Ways to Bring Mindful Presence to the Season.by Wendy Strgar on Dec 9, 2012 This holiday season, enlarge your experience of both giving and receiving in your most meaningful relationships by cultivating the same mindful attention you practice on your yoga mat. There is no gift you could offer that will more profoundly enhance the emotional connections in your life than your focused attention, which explains why most people [...] 913 views |
 A Blessing of Gratitude.by Wendy Strgar on Dec 1, 2012 “May the nourishment of the earth be yours. May the clarity of light be yours, may the fluency of the ocean be yours, may the protection of the ancestors be yours. And so may a slow wind work these words of love around you, an invisible cloak to mind your life.” ~ John O’Donohue Losing everything [...] 261 views |
 Vying For Sexual Unity.by Wendy Strgar on Nov 17, 2012 “Where love rules, there is no will to power; and where power predominates, there love is lacking. The one is the shadow of the other.” ~ Carl Jung It was a curious time a few weeks ago as I moved between the Good Vibrations Sex Summit in the heart of downtown San Francisco to the [...] 327 views |
 It is only in this moment.by Wendy Strgar on Nov 10, 2012 “In this moment can you fall off the tightrope of all the constructs you have built in your life that keep you from not knowing? In this moment, can you surrender into your own discomfort and stay?” 290 views |
 The Good Losers.by Wendy Strgar on Oct 27, 2012 I don’t know why there is so much shame about losers in our culture. We are trained to want to win from the earliest age and all of the thousands of hours of sports coverage that we watch throughout our lives centers on the winning. Even when the win is gotten by millimeters or milliseconds, [...] 87 views |
Tantra of the Heart: 5 Real Measures.by Wendy Strgar on Oct 19, 2012 “Tantra loves, and loves unconditionally. It never says no to anything whatsoever, because everything is part of the whole, and everything has its own place in the whole, and the whole cannot exist with anything missing from it.” ~ Osho “Faith is where you hold your heart.” This is what one of the master teachers [...] 1,711 views |
 Tantra Tips: Open Your Eyes & Breathe.by Wendy Strgar on Oct 12, 2012 “There are moments in moist love when heaven is jealous of what we on earth can do.” ~ Hafiz Moist love, as opposed to dry love, is a container where the partners adhere to each other. Think of garden soil and how fecund moist soil is literally the root of anything that wants to be [...] 3,027 views |
 Yoga Journal Estes: Tantra’s Middle Way.by Wendy Strgar on Oct 5, 2012 “A flowering of orgasm, an expansion of orgasm into endless full bloom in the whole body.” ~Yogani I have been swimming in a sea of tantra this week, at the Yoga Journal pre-conference Tantra intensive in the Rocky Mountains. There are elk crooning, calling their mates outside my bedroom window; the scene is breathtaking, like [...] 438 views |
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 Intimate Positions.by Wendy Strgar on Sep 14, 2012 Source: google.com.jm via Ravi on Pinterest The Asana of Relationships Yoga and relationships have a lot in common. Besides the fact that they are both a practice that is enhanced through mindful attention, they also both rely on the same core principles of cultivating and balancing strength and flexibility. Just like daily yoga practice, the asana of relationships is constantly changing, and what [...] 981 views |
The Asana of Relationships: Balancing Flexibility & Strength.by Wendy Strgar on Sep 7, 2012 “Consciousness is a causative force in the human body; it reshapes the body.” ~ Paul McLean, Nobel Prize Speech Back in my 20s, when I first learned about yoga I would go to class, eager to mold my body into the shapes of crow, cobra, triangle and others that my beautiful teacher demonstrated, in [...] 675 views |
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Moment of Truth.by Wendy Strgar on Aug 25, 2012 I have come to say goodbye to my friend, as she enters the hospice-phase of her cancer journey. During the long six-hour drive to get here, my memory of our meeting came back to me, as though it was twenty days ago and not twenty years. She is an artist and most of my [...] 189 views |
Bigger than Penn State.by Wendy Strgar on Aug 17, 2012 Media stories of childhood sex abuse have filled the airwaves of late; from the Penn State trial of Jerry Sandusky to the ongoing Catholic Church scandals to the first conviction of a high ranking church official. While these stories stir our outrage, their telling and re-telling truly only reflect the tip of the iceberg when [...] 142 views |
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Scented Thoughts.by Wendy Strgar on Jul 27, 2012 “The act of smelling something, anything, is remarkably like the act of thinking. Immediately at the moment of perception, you can feel the mind going to work, polling one center of the brain after another for signs of recognition, for old memories and old connection.” ~ Lewis Thomas Our sense of smell is ancient—it’s [...] 761 views |
Planning Time for Sex.by Wendy Strgar on Jul 20, 2012 “Time is a created thing. To say ‘I don’t have time,’ is like saying, ‘I don’t want to.” ~ Lao Tzu How we spend our time is what our life is made of, and our intimate relationships are a clear reflection of the time we invest in them. Relationship growth is a capital investment in [...] 2,805 views |
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Opening to Change.by Wendy Strgar on Jun 12, 2012 “Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ~ Lao Tzu For as many euphemisms as there are about how life is always changing, most of us often struggle with the reality of [...] 212 views |
Learning Enjoyment.by Wendy Strgar on Jun 8, 2012 In a love business, the idea of pleasure is a primary theme and as a writer on the topic of enhancing pleasure, I have often freely exchanged the concepts of pleasure and enjoyment, as though they were one in the same. 499 views |
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National Abandonment.by Wendy Strgar on May 10, 2012 Perhaps the single most devastating emotional pain we suffer is abandonment. Millions of children know this experience as their primary relationship to their parents, and the effects are wide-ranging and long-lasting. Abandonment is rarely about the person being left, it is most always a reflection of what is broken in the person doing the leaving. 143 views |
Opening Up To Healing.by Wendy Strgar on May 5, 2012 Dealing with the wounds of life on both a physical and emotional level is our first occupation. 550 views |
How We Use Text Messages to Escape Real Communication.by Wendy Strgar on Apr 27, 2012 Using technology to escape the difficult communications of our lives simply adds insult to injury 479 views |
Killing Time.by Wendy Strgar on Apr 20, 2012 “As if you could kill time without injuring eternity.” ~Henry David Thoreau, “Economy,” Walden, 1854 Our time is our life. Facebook, the leader in social media, reportedly consumes over eight billion minutes of time for its collected membership every single day. It is hard to imagine what that amount of time represents, so I recalculated it [...] 81 views |
Relationships: Our Best Hope for Learning to Live with & Love the Weakest Parts of Our Character.by Wendy Strgar on Apr 13, 2012 “Man is a knot into which relationships are tied.” ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry Life is made of moments of unraveling. There are good reasons everyday that things come undone, but perhaps none so painful as the undoing of our most intimate relationships. It’s easy to understand how living with the difficult emotions of disappointment, embarrassment [...] 1,386 views |
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