Why? Because you have gifts and talents to offer the world and they deserve nurturing and appreciation from you first. You know the idea that you need to love yourself before others can love you? Well, I believe that’s a half truth. Others can love you even if you don’t love yourself, but it’s difficult to fully accept love from others if you can’t find that love for yourself and from yourself. So, we’re supposed to love ourselves and yet not be full of ourselves? Our culture is full of confusing and conflicting ideas and I believe this is one that can really hold people back from realizing their true potential and really feeling fantastic about their lives. Do you want to feel fantastic more often?
What does the term “full of yourself” mean in American culture? It’s usually said to someone that seems cocky or has “too much” pride or confidence. It’s definitely a criticism and a way to knock people down a peg or two. Now, I’m not advocating that people go around considering themselves better than others because I believe compassion is so essential for a healthy life and healthy energy. However, when we are able to fully acknowledge and appreciate our own gifts, we’ll be more likely to see the gifts in others and have a life full of appreciation!
When you fill your own cup and focus your energy inwards, you can experience more abundance because more energy will spill forth from that. Your cup will be overflowing. When you give of yourself, you’ll be giving from the overflow, rather than from your core. This is so important, for anybody. It is particularly important for healers and parents who give and give without reservation to others but don’t know how to give to themselves. When you take time to care for yourself and set healthy boundaries, you’ll experience much better flow in all areas of your life. You’ll have more energy, more ease in your relationships, more confidence, less resentment anger and burn-out. It’s all in how it’s done and what your intention is. If you lead from a place of love, respect and compassion for yourself and others, you’ll get that in return.
I feel that it’s time for a disclaimer: If you’re making healthy positive changes, it may affect your current relationships. For example, others might ask what you’re doing and want to know how to get similar results. Those are generally the friends and associates that support you in your journey and that you’ll want to continue being around. Sometimes, change is threatening to the people that would rather keep you down. They may not be willing to follow your lead and are more “comfortable” with the person that you were before making these changes. That’s where the challenge comes in and you may need to make some decisions. You might ask yourself if you would rather be surrounded by people that wish success for you or those that wish failure and mediocrity for you? Are you going to continue to love and appreciate yourself for your own benefit and that of those who will be positively affected by the changes they see in you? Are you going to trust that by raising your energy, you’ll better match up with others who have healthy energy, as well?
Here’s another suggestion, focus on clearing clutter out of your life. What messages are you giving yourself? Some sub-conscious re-programming might be in order. What are you surrounded by? Is it things that you love or is there a bunch of unloved, neglected and distracting stuff in your life? Sometimes clutter means people, like those that only know how to give criticism. When you say no to what you don’t want, you leave room for the things that you do want more of. Do you know what you want? Clarity is another benefit of clutter clearing.
You know what? You’re the only person that can make those decisions for yourself. I can tell you that the more you are full of your own energy, the more secure you’ll feel. Go ahead, give yourself a mental high five for a brilliant idea! Write a love letter to yourself. List your talents and gifts and celebrate them. Ask you what you think about a decision before picking up the phone or sending an e-mail. Take care of your mind, body and spirit. Celebrate your successes. Give thanks to source, creator, God, or whatever you feel inspired to thank. Remember that your gifts are called that for a reason and that you have much to give to yourself and the world!
For further reading, check out my other articles on elephant journal:
Claire Burstein, also known as “The Feng Shui Fairy”, is an organizer, feng shui consultant, writer and environmental advocate. You can contact her at [email protected], or 415-368-2884 . Visit her web-site at www.thefengshuifairy.com. Find her on Twitter under the name dynamicbalance.