Heal yourself, heal the world.

Via Ben Ralston
on Jan 19, 2011
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This article is a continuation of my series on healing.

Healing to me is the same thing as personal development and spirituality: it means to bring balance to the self in order to live one’s highest potential. It must embrace every aspect of the person in order to be successful and lasting: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.

Today I had an email from a client that I worked with last month. I had two sessions with her over skype, and… well, I’m going to let these emails speak for themselves!

Subject Healing
Recipient [email protected]
Date 12.11.2010 16:28
“Hello Ben,
… I really struggle with stomach/digestive issues and have
been struggling for at least 15 plus years… as well as eating disorders (binge/overeating to be specific current day).
I have severe constipation (have tried almost every natural remedy to help but no relief).
I have been to numerous healers and therapists in attempt to heal myself.
I have completely changed my way of eating for the better within the past few years (still have major digestive issues).
I need your help. Many healers have told me that I hold most of my issues in my stomach/gut/intestines, which happens to be where the physical symptoms present themselves. It just seems that I have tried so many things and spent so much time and money and still do not feel as good as I believe I should or can.
I am striving for complete healing and feel that it is possible. I struggle with feeling hopeless because nothing seems to be working.
My stomach issues affect me on so many levels… emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually etc and I feel so desperate to get better…”

So, to summarize: this client, who I will call M, had a 15-year history of eating disorders, digestive problems, severe constipation, and the consequent feelings of hopelessness.

Compare the above email to this one, which I received from M today (note: my second and last session with her was 20th December, a month ago):

Subject Hi Ben
Recipient Prem Center
Date Today 03:51
Hi Ben,

… I have been doing so well. Feeling better than I ever have. I am hesitant to even speak about it but at the same time so thankful and want to be aware and keep recognizing the positive changes that have occurred so far. I often find myself saying I can’t believe I feel as good as I do…

For the first time I feel hopeful and not stuck (like we talked about). I actually feel freer than I ever have. I haven’t had out of control cravings; I have been eating balanced meals… making better choices. I feel that I have been way calmer, balanced and am handling things better lately than I have in the past. I go to bed satisfied … and I wake up in no pain!

I have been going to the bathroom pretty regularly for me (maybe not for someone else but great for me!). Overall, I feel so so so much better and am still in shock about it all. So hard to believe I feel good, I am trying to trust that this is the way it is supposed to be and will be. I am trying to also remember that I am allowed to feel this good and it is my God given right to feel this way. I have had days where things have not been so great (my mood mostly or over eating) but I am able to work through those days and episodes a lot differently than I had before. I have a ways to go with what goes through my head and my eating/body issues but I am progressing!  I feel that the work that we did has left me much more balanced and is helping me live rather than exist. I feel happier, I am allowing myself to feel.

Thank you again…”

I don’t know what to add!

This is the perfect example of a person who had problems (don’t we all?) but also had a sincere desire to take responsibility for those problems, and do something about it. In that situation, I can help, and it’s my great pleasure to do so!

I love to do this work because I know from my own experience that when we heal ourselves, we also heal our children: we make the world a better place for the generations to come.

Humanity is like a tree. If you want to take care of a plant, you nourish its roots. We, here and now, are the roots. The branches, flowers, and fruits will come later. We must take care of the roots now, so that the tree can grow beautiful and healthy and strong. That’s the intention behind this work.

It’s worth noting that M’s problems were both physical and emotional. Reference Point Therapy is a technique that works with consciousness itself: since our emotions and body are both simply expressions of the underlying consciousness, this work can help any problem.

What do you think – is it possible that an alternative healing modality can be so powerful? Do you have any experience of RPT yourself? Please share your opinion / experience by leaving a comment… and also give a facebook ‘like’, or share the article. Spread the love!

With love


Read more about this work on my blog Grounded Spirituality.


About Ben Ralston

Ben Ralston has been practising personal development—necessity being the Mother of invention—since he was about six years old. He’s been teaching and sharing what he’s learnt along the way for a couple of decades. His main thing is Heart of Tribe retreats—whose very purpose is to help you fall back in love with life, no less. Leading these retreats alongside his woman Kara-Leah Grant—also an elephant journal writer (that’s how they met!)—they combine a deep well of lineage-based yoga teaching experience, with expertise in healing trauma and various other methods of personal development. Ben also works with clients one-on-one via Skype, writes, makes videos from time to time, and is passionate about parenting. He lives in an intentional, tribal community in the hills of Croatia, where you might find him gardening barefoot and talking to the rocks. Connect with Ben on Facebook or YouTube or check out his website for more info.


2 Responses to “Heal yourself, heal the world.”

  1. Sarah says:

    Hey Ben
    Thank you for the above written piece. I went through an eating disorder myself for about ten years and an amazing healing process which came down to me taking responsibility for my problems and doing something about it. I then went on to becoming a counselor for those experiencing eating disorders, challenged with issues such as self esteem, lack of self love and addictions of all kinds. What I have learned so far is indeed that in order to help others we must first CHOOSE and LEARN to help ourselves, to love ourselves which in turn will enable us to help and love the whole world (literally). In the words of Bill Cosby "hurt people, hurt people" and vice versa…
    Thanks again. I enjoy everything you write.
    Kindest regards 🙂

  2. Ben_Ralston says:

    Hi Sarah, thank you…
    Yes, it's an interesting fact that most healers have come through some kind of trauma themelves… and on the other side find themselves drawn to helping others.
    'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'!
    Love! Ben