Lover Or Guru?~ February 12th.

Via Benjamin Riggs
on Feb 12, 2011
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The experience of true love is an unavoidable accident. It is the spontaneous malfunction of ego’s defenses…

Intimate relationships have the potential to be self-styled prisons or meditation in action. We do not have to control the situation. We do not have to set up all these boundaries that define the relationship. If the relationship is truly based on love, it is intelligent. We need to trust this intelligence. Direct observation is the only prerequisite for trust. All of the confusion, and the behaviors that express our confusion are connected with our basic being, or energy. We do not need to repress or hide our confusion, as that would be dishonest. Rather, we need to observe our confusion. We need to face the obstacles that prevent complete vulnerability, and the expression of pure love or intelligence. Obstacles are life’s way of forcing us to relate with that which we have chosen to ignore. In observing our confusion, we see it for what it is. When confusion is seen for what it is, it is immediately transformed into wisdom. Observation and transformation are opposite sides of the same coin. Transformation is the pressing out of observation. It is a state of ignore-ance that sustains our fears, and the observation of ignorance is enlightenment. ~via “From The Bedroom To The Cushion” on Elephant Journal by Ben Riggs

Dr. Reggie Ray on intimacy… Short & Brilliant.


About Benjamin Riggs

Ben Riggs is the author of Finding God in the Body: A Spiritual Path for the Modern West. He is also the director of the Refuge Meditation Group in Shreveport, LA and a teacher at Explore Yoga. Ben writes extensively about Buddhist and Christian spirituality on Elephant Journal, and his blog. Click here to listen to the Finding God in the Body Podcast. To keep up with all of his work follow him on Facebook or Twitter.


2 Responses to “Lover Or Guru?~ February 12th.”

  1. Joe Sparks says:

    There are a lot of indications that babies are born enormously intelligent, with a much greater grasp of what's going on than has usually been considered. Each baby, and that was every one of us, emerges having been used to warm,intimate contact with another human being and is of such a nature that intrinsically he or she cannot function well alone. To do well, they need warm, intimate contact with other human beings. And yet in our society, in the name of sterile conditions, and so on, most of us were taken from our mamma, and slapped hard to make sure we started crying. Then we were wrapped up tightly and bundled into a glass-fronted nursery with about 20 or 30 other unhappy litttle babies, and we screamed our despair at each other and once in a while got picked up and changed. The loneliness was jammed on us very quickly at a time when we desperately needed reassurance because we'd just been through this tough emergence from water-breathing to air- breathing. Birth was a traumatic experience.

  2. Joe Sparks says:

    Just when we needed warm reassurance, we were given intense loneliness. In effect a plastic bag was wrapped around us, and for most of us that plastic bag has seldom pierced. We continue to grow up lonely. We reach out for somebody, and the recorded response is, "Be a big boy," or "Dear , I'm busy," or whatever. Noneof the adults meant to hurt us. None of the adults meant to hurt us. Those were just recordings that that were infesting them and hurting them before tey passed them on to us. But the loneliness continues, as we grow up lonelier, lonelier, lonelier.