10 Reasons I like being Single.

Via elephant journal
on May 18, 2011
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Single not as in dating. Single as in, all alone.


1. Boring is good.

2. I get more work done, with less guilt (inside-out, or outside-in).

3. I exercise more.

4. It’s cheaper.

5. I sit around blabbing less.

6. Less drama.

7. Less planning all the time.

8. Loneliness is kinda nice.

9. I like sleeping alone, anyway, I’m big and can spread out.

10. Ummmm…help me out here, add your reason in comments?


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125 Responses to “10 Reasons I like being Single.”

  1. Hyacinth says:

    I do what I want to do,when I want to,where I want,and with whom I want.Ciao!heheh

  2. mary says:

    To quote an old song…I can run through the house screamin’ 🙂

  3. Laura G. says:

    I have love and support and acceptance from two ex boy friends (one who affectionately calls me "The Ex Wife" and has been there through thick and thin for the last 15 years) and the guy who just broke up with me, but told me he will always feel a responsibility for me irregardless of any new relationships either of us should have, because of all I have done nd do do. I just don't need to explain myself, or lie about where I spent my money or pretend to be sick if I just want to veg out in front of the TV, and I can decorate any way I want to!

    It's the best of both worlds!

  4. Beth says:

    I agree with you, AMO, wholeheartedly. So many comments here are about self sacrifice, giving power away, talk of drama etc, that's not relationship…

  5. Beth says:


  6. Kiiran says:

    My own lifestyle choices. Enjoy all the discussion here.

  7. elephantjournal says:

    Choga Nyima I get to lay sideway's in bed!
    about an hour ago · UnlikeLike · 3 peopleLoading…
    Beth Wallace Single does not always equate to being alone, that's rather a narrow view of relationships, I think.
    57 minutes ago · LikeUnlike · 3 peopleLoading…
    Chisti Ma that i don't take my love for granted now. alone time is sooooo necessary!!!
    57 minutes ago · UnlikeLike · 2 peopleLoading…
    Blair Christian If I have gas, I have gas…no apologies required lol
    57 minutes ago · UnlikeLike · 4 peopleLoading…
    Laura Gharazeddine If I want to paint the bathroom black and grey with red and industrial accents-I CAN!!! (It was witnessing a married couple "decorate by committee" that convinced me that living alone is great!)
    56 minutes ago · UnlikeLike · 3 peopleLoading…
    Darrin Buehler I have had both. Single, I am more of who I am, and I am more relaxed.
    52 minutes ago · LikeUnlike · 2 peopleLoading…
    Joe Allegretti Almost everything. Almost always.
    51 minutes ago · LikeUnlike · 1 personLoading…
    Melinda Freeman Personally, I feel less lonely being single than I ever did in a relationship. I am enough . . . and that feels good. Also, I'm not getting distracted from my personal path by a relationship.
    50 minutes ago · LikeUnlike · 2 peopleLoading…
    Zumbulka Hyacinth I do what I want to do,when I want,where I want,& with whom I want! heheh
    49 minutes ago · LikeUnlike · 1 personLoading…
    Joe Allegretti I sure as hell don't exercise more though. LOL
    31 minutes ago · UnlikeLike · 2 peopleLoading…
    Beth Wallace
    You can do what you want in a relationship, how you want, where you want, with who you want etc etc… if you compromise who you authentically are in a relationship then you aren't being true to yourself or the person (or people) you're in …relationship with, it's dishonest, if they don't like what they see then then can leave, if you don't like what you see, then you can leave….. simple. The only rules in life are the ones YOU choose to obey, or not, but for me? rules are the cages of limitation, and I have no interest in them.See More
    27 minutes ago · LikeUnlike · 1 personSandi Strong likes this.
    Kenyatta Johnson Peace and quiet. I welcome solitude.
    23 minutes ago · LikeUnlike
    Charlotte Noruzi
    Being single, I've learned a hell of a lot more about myself than I ever did being in an (unconscious) relationship. I also have a much better sense of self, of who I am when I'm single.
    3 minutes ago · LikeUnlike
    Charlotte Noruzi Are there only 12 single people in the world?? Or are we the only ones brave enough and not ashamed of being single, to comment 🙂

  8. betterdeal says:

    I only have my own neurosis to contend with instead of someone else's too.

  9. Lisa says:

    I agree… there are pros and cons to both… however being in a mutually respectful loving growing relationship… is awesome though sleeping alone is a good one for me … I love taking up the entire bed…. for now.. until that time I can spoon…

  10. Irene Turner says:

    I could eat in bed…watch what I wanted to on TV, work at 1 in the morning if I wanted to, talk on the phone to friends at all hours, decorate exactly how I wanted to, I only bought low calorie food so I was skinnier, I didn't have to shave or shower all the time, I could sleep in the middle of my bed…and, I have the best husband in the world, so…I'm happy now too!

  11. […] Joes are looking to trim a little here and cut a little there: college students, young couples, the single and ready to mingle, […]

  12. 13thfloorelevators says:

    The complaint re being constantly criticized is almost exclusively coming from women for a reason.

  13. 13thfloorelevators says:

    "it seems to me that some Elephant Journal readers are willing to compromise themselves, and give their power away, to the point of losing themselves in relationships."

    It's not an elephant reader thing, per se. Women have been taught for centuries that sacrifice and utter selflessness to the point of losing themselves to the relationship is the proper way to engage in a heterosexual relationship. The notion of doing it any other way is an extremely recent development, and there has been a dearth of role models for recent generations on *how* to go about it. And as any woman who has dated much in the last 20 yrs will tell you, many otherwise nice men come to expect it to some degree and get upset when it doesn't happen.

  14. warriorsaint says:

    Random thought on marriage: once you are together long enough farts become funny again.

  15. Susan says:

    Clean up my messes if and when and want.
    No one elses mess to clean up.
    Come and go as I please.
    Love it. Can sing and play my piano anytime of the day or night.
    My dogs can sleep with me (beside me) lol, and keep me warm.
    Eat when I want, what if want, if I want.
    Sleep when I want and if I want.
    I agree it's a very selfish thing…..oh well.

  16. I have been ROTFLMAO over some of the comments….i totally agree…on all points 😉 but the benefits of singledom are hilarious – and a great reminder 🙂

  17. dave says:

    Two words: Duvet covers! I’m slightly less of a man for even knowing what this is…. A COVER… FOR YOUR COVERS!! I still get aggitated thinking of this contraption…

  18. empowermentyoga says:


  19. Rebecca says:

    There really is such a thing as beauty sleep. Without someone next to me snoring, I get QUALITY sleep, and it keeps the wrinkles away!

  20. Dove says:

    1) Freedom…to do whatever ya' want, whenever ya' want
    2) Clothing optional…cook supper nekkie, lol…with no one groping, ogling, or stalking ya' (or critiquing you)
    3) No freaky friends or family members of his in your home, messin' with your stuff
    4) Peace, quiet, and lots and lots of privacy
    5) Can sit by the window doing absolutely nothing without judgment/comment (including unspoken)
    6) Be messy or tidy as it suits you on any given day–and it stays that way as long as you like
    7) Can dance and sing "like nobody's watching," lol
    8) You rule–money, TV, computer, bed time…
    9) Magic happens in solitude–like with meditation, it spurs those cool synchronicities 🙂
    10) No sharing stuff you don't wanna share — like the bathroom.

  21. […] For now, being alone seems increasingly attractive: I can work obsessively, which I need to do right now; I have time to exercise; and I don’t have anyone trying to fix me except me—and my first therapist, and my meditation instructor—and they both realize I’m fundamentally blue sky, as are we all. […]

  22. Lisa says:

    Freedom to day dream endlessly, without someone asking what you are thinking about.

  23. […] I had been to the drum circle many times before, but last Sunday on the anniversary of September 11th, I wandered to the park alone, having been too late for a yoga class, and too tired to trek home, and too caught up in my singularity. […]

  24. Mel says:

    I love you Debi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You made me smile today & I SO agree

  25. Just posted to the elephant Love FaceBook Page

    Jennifer Cusano, Editor elephant Love and Relationships
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  26. Sports Diva E says:

    good one

  27. Laura says:

    1. No need to worry about your decisions within your life and having to justify them.
    2. You can travel where ever and when ever, if you have the means to.
    3. You only have to clean up after yourself.

  28. Josh Panter says:

    How about being free from the overwhelming burden of feeling like you NEED to find someone to live with, or to spend the rest of your life with? Being free from the bio-social conditioning inherent in the human experience that explains to us how we ought to spend every waking day of our lives? Free to explore the deep and ever-expansive well of meaningfulness and rich beauty right in front of our faces that is of pure existence unencumbered and unconditioned…. Or even non-selfishly cultivating a genuine, deep, authentically true relationship with the whole of life and the ever-living moment without feeling the pressing need to make that all about one other person and their own unique quirks? Not being blinded by the amazingness of that one person so that you can, instead, focus on falling in love with the whole of humanity, or the raw naked moment itself? How about taking our focus off of the urge to couple, and getting away from the clingy need to "be" with someone, and learning to be a good person all on our own? How about having more time to be honest with ourselves about who we are, what we feel, what makes us tick, how we have organized our lives, and so on, without the burden of the karma of a relationship to keep our head spinning and hands whirling about juggling moment to moment karmas of interaction? How about quiet, stillness, and peace? How about a space to stop and meditate whenever the "urge" arises? How about being free to redefine who you are or what you are doing at a moments notice, or to let go of what you find you are holding onto at a moments notice, without the burden of feeling like you have to find a way to explain that to someone else, or justify your change in course?

    It is the opposite of selfishness, but it is also the opposite of that. Unhitching from focusing on the beauty of that "one" person, and unhitching from the recognition that we can grow so much from that one person, certainly leaves us open to cultivate that intimacy with the whole of life.

    Now, finding those freedoms with someone else in your daily life? That would be pricelessly awesome.

  29. let's see, freedom from dysfunctional relationship dynamics, and freedom to walk my path, honestly see who I am, differentiated from others and so maybe I can actually get a clue. learning not to grasp. learning about love.
    my life with my three sons is sweet, open, and real, they get the real me, loving and creative, not restricted and defined by relationship.

  30. Neesha says:

    That's my fave reason! <3

  31. bette says:

    preachin to the choir child!!!!

  32. narayan says:

    FREEDOM!!! … is all i ever wanted …. best way to enslave a women is to marry her off and make her have babies!!! that is enslavement !! that is waste of a good women … we are soo much more than that! …..ask the dali!

  33. narayan says:

    spare the life affirming enriching crap … that is what all good codependents say…hello pot , this is the kettle …. there is nothing more gratifying then knowing one can be totally self sustainable in mind body soul and connection to source … i do not derive my energy or love from any one but my self and god.dess….

  34. Donna says:

    No. 10 I get to hang out with me and that's pretty awesome

  35. fluxustulip says:

    Complete silliness…do we need reasons? Funny.

    #0=I like myself.

    #1-∞ =If I like myself less in someone's presence, we are done. (all the variants of this that are implied…)

  36. hannahmsw says:

    I can eat whatever the hell I want, or not at all.

  37. Oriah says:

    I get to see and take full responsibility for my own misery when it arises instead of being tempted to see it as the other's fault.

  38. aly says:

    Compromise, what?

  39. rgw says:

    My husband and 4-year-old son are away from home tonight….I'm home with my 1-year-old daughter who went to bed at 6pm….no other plans…..I made a nice dinner for myself, watched some TV and worked on art projects…..it was actually a marvelous evening!

    ……but most things really aren't worth doing unless you can share them with someone. I'm glad my house is chaotic and messy….I'm a better person for it. But a reprieve every now and then is important.

  40. Bree says:

    That's an absolutely phenomenal phrase. So often I see so much beauty in people; in a relationship, when admiring other's spectacular-ness, you feel a sense of guilt. Then you're just confined.

  41. Jenna says:

    Eat what I want, when I want
    Don't have plan meals if I don't want to, can just eat toast if I want to
    No compromises
    Can go out when I want, with whoever I want
    Can stay out for longer or til late if I'm enjoying myself , don't have to explain myself
    Can chat to whoever as long as I feel like it
    Don't have to spend time with other people's relatives
    Don't have to manage my own relatives, I can just relax with them

    I could go on. …. I am in a very loving, respectful and gentle relationship right now, by the way. But loving being single is a great way to live. I'm glad I got the chance to do that!

  42. Beth says:

    I can do whatever the hell I want!

  43. Erin says:

    If I'm in a relationship, I just hang out with my boyfriend all the time and don't leave the house/have new experiences as much. Like yesterday, I decided to go to a jazz bar on my own and ended up having a great night! Also, build confidence in myself as a single woman.

  44. Eli says:

    Nice list! Also, I eat healthier, drink less often and more quiet time & stillness for me – all very important and grounding things to me.

  45. Ivy says:

    I don't have to watch someone morph from a Godlike being to a Monster. Done with that.

  46. Ysolda says:

    Especially the Christmas dinners….hahaha. Thanks!

  47. kate says:

    So true. I'm lolling…

  48. Sky says:

    No more picking up after someone else's MESS … !! And, no, I'm NOT OCD 🙂

  49. Luis says:

    Always meet someone new

  50. Alison says:

    Grateful that I really can't relate to this article. I've been single for a while, but rarely feel bored, lonely or short on things to plan for! I might not have anyone to curl up with at the end of the day, but feel connected in a way that many of my "coupled" friends do not know. I am madly in love! Not with one particular person, but with my life and community.