Sexus Plexus: 20 Ways to Light a Fire. {Nudity}

Via Andrea Balt
on Mar 26, 2012
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This post is not about sex. And it won’t teach you how to light a fire.

It’s about interrupted love, and reptilian birds in the sky, and awkward lips made of spring, and life as a pizza, and dinosaurs, and something that looks suspiciously like a flower; and everything else you can fit in that brief forever-and-ever-amen.

Oh, but I failed Sex in school. I got suspended for asking Why. They kicked me out of the library for reading out loud. The way the dictionary put it, I thought Sex must be a typo of nature. So I made my own dictionary. (Revised and unabridged, mind you, still trying to understand my handwriting).

I think sex might as well be literature before it turns into Sex, just as language has to be You before it turns into words. With sex you don’t just get to read the book, you get to be the book, however poorly written, you have pages and words (some only whispered, others tattooed) all over your skin, and they itch when you touch. And they sing.

You should at least win a short-story contest with your body.

But ‘til death do us part (Madame Existential, as faithful and painful as Life), let’s make some fire, can I call you Darling? Let’s burn Pinocchio, not only is he made of wood but he’s been lying to us all along.

(1930s Weimar, Via Tumblr)

My top 20 Sexy Sparks of the Week for the (un) sexual:

Meaning life, meaning god, “no smoke, no fire”—got a lighter?


The tragedy of sexual intercourse is the perpetual virginity of the soul.
~ William B. Yeats


The only thing wrong with being an atheist is that there’s nobody to talk to during an orgasm.  ~ Unknown

{My only solid argument against the non-believer.}


The lover of life makes the whole world into his family, just as the lover of the fair sex creates his from all the lovely women he has found, from those that could be found, and those who are impossible to find. ~ Charles Baudelaire


Sex. In America, an obsession. In other parts of the world, a fact.  ~ Marlene Dietrich

{I attest to this. In Europe, we welcome any chance to take off our clothes.}


There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted.  ~ Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behaviour

{For a minute here, I loved being Jane Austen.}


I’d like to meet the man who invented sex and see what he’s working on now.
~ Unknown

{I’d like to interview “him”.}


Sex is emotion in motion. ~ Mae West


Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn’t!  ~ George Bernard Shaw

{Who will you be confessing to, ye sinner? Your lover? Nonsense!}


Literature is mostly about having sex and not much about having children; life is the other way around.  ~ David Lodge

{But more often than not, kiddies are the best side effect of sex.}


An intellectual is a person who’s found one thing that’s more interesting than sex.
~ Aldous Huxley

{Not quite, though, not all the way, not replaceable, not the same.}


(French erotica, 1930s – via Tumblr)

 Life without sex might be safer but it would be unbearably dull. It is the sex instinct which makes women seem beautiful, which they are once in a blue moon, and men seem wise and brave, which they never are at all. Throttle it, denaturalize it, take it away, and human existence would be reduced to the prosaic, laborious, boresome, imbecile level of life in an anthill.  ~ Henry Louis Mencken


The reproduction of mankind is a great marvel and mystery. Had God consulted me in the matter, I should have advised him to continue the generation of the species by fashioning them out of clay.  ~ Martin Luther

{Oh Martin, you’re delightful. What’s one to make of laughter without snorting?}


Sex contains all,
Bodies, Souls, meanings, proofs, purities, delicacies, results, promulgations,
Songs, commands, health, pride, the maternal mystery, the seminal milk;
All hopes, benefactions, bestowals,
All the passions, loves, beauties, delights of the earth,
All the governments, judges, gods, follow’d persons of the earth,
These are contain’d in sex, as parts of itself, and justifications of itself.
~ Walt Whitman

{Marry me?}


I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them.  ~ Jay McInerney

{I wish cliches weren’t just generalized, ridiculous, mass truth at their core.}


Sex is. There is nothing more to be done about it. Sex builds no roads, writes no novels and sex certainly gives no meaning to anything in life but itself. ~ Gore Vidal


It doesn’t matter what you do in the bedroom as long as you don’t do it in the street and frighten the horses.  ~ Mrs. Patrick Campbell

{Well said, Mrs. Campbell, last time they ran off and I had to take the subway.}


There is more to sex appeal than just measurements. I don’t need a bedroom to prove my womanliness. I can convey just as much sex appeal, picking apples off a tree or standing in the rain. ~ Audrey Hepburn

{If you’re not in love with this woman, you’re either a V or an alien cowboy with a robot soul.}


I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was ‘the man goes on top and the woman underneath.’ For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds.
~ Joan Rivers

{I blame my father. He just blushed when I asked, so I turned to Vogue.}


“I respect you,” he murmured. “And your views. I think of you as an equal. I respect your brains, and all those big words you like to use. But I also want to rip your clothes off and have sex with you until you scream and cry and see God.”

~ Lisa Kleypas

{Open the window, get me water, let’s do yoga.}


I saved the Australopithecus one for the end. Read it in a cave and you’re all set. Because a part of us is still prehistoric, simple and raw. It doesn’t think much. It feels. And it laughs. And it sighs.

And abandons.


~ Like elephant sexy & elephant love on Facebook. ~



About Andrea Balt

Co-Founder / Editor in Chief of Rebelle Society, Wellness Alchemist at Rebelle Wellness & Creativity Curator at Creative Rehab. Unfinished book with a love for greens, bikes and poetry; raised by wolves & adopted by people; not trying to make art but to Be Art. Holds a BA in Journalism & Mass Communication, an MFA in Creative Writing & a Holistic Health Coach degree from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition®. In her work she tries to reflect the wholeness of the human experience by combining Art & Health + Brains & Beauty + Darkness & Brilliance into a more alive, unabridged and unlimited edition of ourselves. She is also on a quest to reinstate Creativity as one of our essential Human Rights to (hopefully and soon) be included in the UN Declaration. Connect with her on Facebook, Twitter & Instagram and sign up for her Monthly Stroke of Renaissance.


17 Responses to “Sexus Plexus: 20 Ways to Light a Fire. {Nudity}”

  1. robertwolf681 says:

    Thought ya might like to know that I pilfered the quote about atheism leaving no-one to talk to during an orgasm for my FB status and Twitter. Couldn't see any way of crediting you, so posting here is my next best option. Thanks.

  2. Andréa Balt says:

    Thanks Robert! Loved that quote, just tweeted it. No worries about crediting me, it's an unknown author and this is really just a quote collection. On the other hand we're always happy and grateful when people share the entire article (as opposed to only a song/video/quote included in it), since it helps us spread the word and support indie media, but only if they feel inspired.

    And now, let's "be believers". 🙂

  3. Black Dirt Goddess says:

    I too was going to pilfer the quote and shared the article~ i decided to go with the Hepburn quote…
    love how erotic the French were in the 30's! 🙂
    nice work.
    you can find your love being spread here:

  4. robertwolf681 says:

    Cool. It was only that quote that really lit a fire under me, which is why I chose to share it. An' yeah, it is from an unknown source, but I wouldn't have known about it but for finding it here, so I wanted to letcha know.

    I never believe on the first comment. Maybe when we've gotten to know one another a bit better, though. ; )

  5. Andréa Balt says:

    hahahah, good sense of humor. xoxo

  6. Andréa Balt says:

    Sweet! Thanks. Honored. Loved your Dirt Goddess pieces! Just friended you.

    PS. The Hepburn one is an all-time favorite. And the French 30s, let's just say they switched me at birth, but instead of a different family, I got a different time in history. So I go back to the 30s often through Google's time machine.

  7. Black Dirt Goddess says:

    thnks! the 30's were very cool…20's were too…the innocence of 'erotica' left something to the imagination and the women rocked curves and pin curls and were the predecessors to the pin up girls who def mark one of my fave times for women in art 🙂
    and i dont think any o f them ever were a thong.

  8. ValCarruthers says:

    OMG, Andrea I am still laughing :))) You had me at "sex must be a typo of nature." Sharing this!

    PS: So that French erotica photo was from the 1930s? Thought the man was Adrien Brody in a movie still.

    PPS: One day (and soon!) how about a post of Andrea-only quotes!! (World, brace yourself.)


  9. Eric says:

    I concur with Val~thought it was Adrien Brody in that photo…

    a Buddhist teacher once told me (and rightfully so): "You must love ALL women–but you can't LOVE every woman."

  10. Andréa Balt says:

    Thanks Val! Yes, Adrien Brody is timeless, right? But definitely not him in the pic. I know it because I was the girl and I would have remembered. 🙂

    An Andrea-only quotes would probably drive people crazy & away from elephant. Not great for traffic. But I'll try. Maybe the answer to life is right where you least expect it to be. (So profound I still don't get it).

  11. Andréa Balt says:

    Smart teacher. Did he use ALL-CAPS too, or does my case-sensitive, editor eye have a tic? 🙂

  12. Jessica says:

    Shared and quoted the miss manners one…..because of the food part!

  13. Eric says:

    ~Yes, written to convey the spoken emphasis. LOVE is an active verb in this context. or any other for that matter… "Venga y encienda mi fuego (Baby)!!!" (disculpas for my shite Español via translator. my Inglés is shite also 🙂

    And I disagree with Vidal: sex can give many many meanings….

  14. allison says:

    this was just amazing! thank you 🙂 loved it

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