A Call to the Sacred Masculine: Ten Daring Invitations from the Divine Feminine.

Via Lori Ann Lothian
on May 29, 2012
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Photo: Michael Julian Berz

If I am going to act like a goddess, I want a man who acts like a god.

Yet all this talk lately of the goddess and the Divine Feminine seems like new-age wishful thinking, a fantasy archetype with as much to do with real life as Superwoman or the Fairy God Mother.


While goddess propagandists promote the unilateral concept of a spiritually elevated womanhood—strong but supple, decisive and nurturing, wild yet wise—glaringly absent is a call to the Sacred Masculine counterpoint. Women can forever rally around each other, cheerleading new heights of intuitive and open-hearted power, but without the cooperation of menfolk stealing their own fire from the gods, we are preaching to the sistah choir.

Bottomline? Organizing a spiritual revolution as women without inviting men to the front lines with us means we are orchestrating a collective reframe with only half the available power. Real change means humanity—yes both genders—opts for the cosmic upgrade to Divine Class together.

So, on behalf of the X chromosome, here is my invitation to mortal men who wish to dance as gods with wanna-be goddesses.

1. Show us your heroic heart. We know you want to save what is worth saving and to rescue this planet from peril. Wage a hero’s battle against poverty, needless strife, environmental ruin or whatever stirs your courageous heart. It might be a plan to increase your neighborhood safety, to improve your child’s education, to plant a vegetable garden in your backyard or to stop prejudice wherever you see it. The world needs your brave heart to take bold action.

2. Unsheathe your sword. As a man, you wield a sword of truth that can cut through cultural distractions to what really matters. The faster car, the better sports team, the bigger salary are all fine and dandy but on your deathbed, what unfulfilled vision will you regret the most? What risk did you back away from? What chance did you refuse to take? Before you die, be bold enough to discover and live your truth.

3. Dare to dream. Before you played the role of mortal, you (well, we) created the heavens and earth. What do you wish to create here and now? What beautiful order do you wish to bring forth from the chaos of this world. What implausible dream do you want to manifest for the greater good of all? It doesn’t have to be grand, like solving world hunger. It can be simple, like solving your child’s homework problem because you are dedicated to being a great father. All we care about is that something brings you alive with passion.

4. Steer the ship. Aim your life for a noble horizon. It’s not like there’s a second in command who will captain your destiny while you snooze on the sofa after too many beers and potato chips with the TV droning in the background. Get to the helm of your life and navigate by your own pole star, the true north of your heart’s burning desire. Tip: if you don’t know what port you’re headed for, no wind is favorable.

5. Bring your soul to work. Work for more than the mortgage and car payments—work because you find some measure of joy in your job. And if the job is just to make ends meet for now, then meet that employment with gratitude and a call to service. Know that it’s not what you do, but what you bring to what you do, that matters.

6. Care deeply. As a man, you might have been taught to feel lightly and think hard, to hold your emotions back, as if you can build a dam against what naturally must flow. But your caring is what this world cries for. The tender-hearted masculine is both wise and merciful. When you weep, you give women permission to be strong. When your heart breaks we want to know it so that we can heal it together.

7. Love fearlessly. Show us the way by standing firm when we are in a beautiful rage. Don’t run from our fury—after all it might contain magical wisdom. In the gale force of feminine anger, your calm is a powerful reminder that we are met and accepted by our beloved partner.

8. Ravish your woman. Every now and then, take her wholeheartedly, without apology. Press her against a wall and bind her with your kisses. Possess your goddess, oh great god that you are, and then let her possess you. Polarity is a potent nectar and the current runs both ways.

9. Slay your demons. We all have them, the dark part of our hearts, the crevices where our fear and loathing hideout. Notice what keeps you awake at night and stalk it. Hunt your darkness and drag it into the light for loving and healing.

10. Leave your mark. Don’t settle for a fleeting cameo in which your appearance in this kingdom is so quickly forgotten. What do you want your children to say about you? Your great-grandchildren? The greatest legacy is not the wealth you leave behind, but your heartfelt message that echoes forward to future generations.

Ultimately, this dance of the divine in both genders is not about lighting incense, chanting at kirtan, wearing white or even gathering in gender-specific goddess groups or men’s Iron John style movements designed to reclaim a lost chest-thumping masculine. Rather, it’s about being real 360-degree humans, embracing both the sacred and the mundane within ourselves and each other.

When men are willing to meet women heart-first and to live from that divine place of kingly wisdom, warrior courage and boy-like vulnerability, we women are given the gift of receiving all of you. And we are given permission to reveal all of who we are—the nurturing goddess, the juicy seductress and yes, even the nasty b*tch.

In the end, the call to a Divine Feminine and Sacred Masculine is perhaps just the simple yearning to get out of our crazy-busy heads and into our still-knowing hearts. As Rumi says, “I looked in Temples, Churches and Mosques. I found the Divine in my heart.”

Whatever the divine really is, let’s find it together.


The qualities to look for in a partner:

Letting Go is Overrated.


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About Lori Ann Lothian

Lori Ann Lothian is a spiritual revolutionary, divine magic maker and all-purpose scribe. Her articles on love, relationships, enlightenment and sex have appeared at Huffington Post, Good Men Project, Yoganonymous, Origin magazine, Better After 50, XO Jane and on her hit personal blog The Awakened Dreamer. She is also the creator of The 40 Day Magic Challenge. a daily practice to create a masterpiece life of ease, flow, joy and prosperity. Lori Ann lives in Vancouver, Canada, with her husband and daughter, where she has learned to transcend the rain and surrender to mega doses of vitamin D. Tweet her at Twitter


216 Responses to “A Call to the Sacred Masculine: Ten Daring Invitations from the Divine Feminine.”

  1. Erik says:

    Sacred Masculine? Great. A woman giving an outline of what that should look like? No thanks. Picture a man giving such a list to women. No matter how much good stuff was on the list, that man would rightly be told to mind his own business. We should steer our own ship? Great. We’ll start by throwing out the list and making one of our own. Lady, take off the captain’s hat. Empowered women are badly needed and much welcome. But this isn’t the ship they should be expecting to steer.

    And I’m tired of writers talking about revalorizing the masculine by linking it to sex with the feminine. Firstly, if we’re to find our power, we need to do it to find the fire in own hearts as our primary goal, not to warm the fire in hers. Not as the primary. Consider how silly women’s empowerment would be if its only real goal was landing the right man. That’s not the Feminine Mystique, that’s Cosmo. Hey there, fish. Enjoy your bicycle.

    Secondly, every such claim alienates our gay brothers. And if we’re to find our fire we need that brotherhood, the brotherhood of all men. How are we straight men to find our way to women if we won’t do the work to first reconnect with our brothers? The assistance we need in this process needs to come from each other, not from without.

    Finally, when women find their power without men’s interference, it falls to we men who trust women to trust that that process is theirs. We have to trust that they will be stronger, more resilient, more at peace, more engaged by their lives. We have to trust that as strong men, we’re strong enough to share the making of the world with strong women. We have to trust that their power will not do us ill, of course. But we also have to trust that for some to follow that thread means they will find only anger and distrust of us. We have to trust that our not being stewards of that process means that we may not like where that process takes some of our sisters, but it’s not our choice and we’re strong enough to cede space for them in that. Well, the same goes here. Women have to keep their hands off this process and trust men to find our way through it. Even if in some cases they don’t like where some men end up. Giving us a road map and a shopping list of what we’re supposed to bring home when we’re done? That’s not that trust.

    Don’t get me wrong. I love that women are supportive of the process. I’m deeply supportive of that process in women, and everyone finding their fire makes for a better world. However, we need a welcome, not a call.

  2. dee vine says:

    Great job lumping all sorts of human traits into sexualized compartments. Of course you'll need a man to do all of these "divine masculine" things since you've disowned half of your own humanity while chasing "the perfect divine feminine". I'm sure you'll find an equally unbalanced man who's disowned all of his "feminine" traits, and finally, the two of you will be able to cobble together your two half personalities into one semi functional human being.

  3. yogasamurai says:

    But does it, in fact, in this context? It's really just a call to a deeper primal connection, and yes, for some women sex also definitely involves the strong imaginative sense of being "taken" by her man. Maybe it's just not your fare? And there's nothing wrong with that, either.

  4. yogasamurai says:

    The amazing thing is, in 2012, this still needs to be said, and you said it so well. Just terrific, "Al."

  5. grow up says:

    and if you men do all of this then and only then will we "goddesses" be able to be happy… that is until you finally wake the fuck up and realize your the problem, your constant unhappiness and blame of man for it is getting so overplayed by the spiritual bullshit that you spew all over everyone. your setting up more "us against them", WE are humans, WE are trying to figure out what we are doing and what we want. I'm so sick of the new age bullshit that says men need to change in order for relationships to work and for women to thrive.

  6. Caelan Huntress says:

    This invitation is long overdue.

    Thank you for accepting men, manhood, and the male energy in the awakening of the Divine Feminine. Awakened men are currently without a rallying cry, a banner under which we can convene, as we watch the Divine Feminine gather in gender-segregated groups.

    Here in Costa Rica, where I live, there is a quarterly Solstice / Equinox gathering to celebrate the divine feminine, and women and children are the only ones allowed to attend.

    As a man, I have felt left out of the awakening, watching on the sidelines. Nevertheless, the masculine energy has a role to play in the evolution of the Divine Feminine as well.

    Thank you for inviting us to celebrate with you. As all good-hearted, spiritually awakened men know, we are stronger when we invite our counterparts to evolve with us, and I hope to see more awakened women extending this invitation as well.

  7. Sorel says:

    I really enjoyed your article Lori. And it seems like you have had to reinforce a number of times in your response to the comments that you were also speaking to the play of feminine and masculine in both men and women. I have the following on a little sticky on my computer monitor: “Nature longs for opposites and effects her harmony from them” – Aristotle. I found this in a book that I think is germane to this conversation and is a total paradigm shifter in the discussion and embodied discovery of the balance of masculine and feminine in each of us. It is called “New Self New World” by Philip Shepherd and he is a fellow Canadian doing ground breaking work on this issue. If you are going to write more on this I highly recommend you check his book out and contact him. His website is http://www.philipshepherd.com. Thanks for your work! Sorel

  8. aleXander says:

    What – no turns for him to be a “goddess”, or for her to be a “god”?

    This idealized masculinity – alas, is basically, “machismo” reinvented. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Machismo.

    Well, with a little vegetable gardening thrown in.)

    Basically this is the author’s fantasy transposed to being a doctrine for men, these gods-to-be. The list might create performance-anxiety in mortals: keeping this “god” thing up (pun intended) 24 hours a day is an unrealistic demand.]

    Ayn Rand had to write fiction to make it possible.

    [Sure – role playing can certainly be fun (all that unsheathing and ravishing), and if the author wants to play “goddess” and for her man to pretend to be Mel Gibson and aggressively captivate her – sure, that can be sexy, and more power/pleasure to ’em.]

    But – my experience with men (60 years on the planet, bisexual) the male gender role proscription (“leaving their mark”) has way too much “god” in it already – look at the “Gods” men have invented over the centuries.

  9. Jens says:

    So true! And I have to admit that the Iron John movement brought me much closer to be that kind of man, because most things you demand play an important role there.

  10. A wonderfully pointed yet balanced inquiry and invitation! We need the fullness of each and all of our aspects to be fully incarnate in this life – whether alone, in communion, or in community. Aho!

  11. yogijulian says:

    beautifully done!

  12. jjthejet says:

    sir your ego keeps you from being a true critic, to deny the fact that most men are and have been lacking in the area of passion and love is to be blind of the truth. and if you see this article as a slight to men then you did not read it with open and uncritical eyes. The article is obviously one persons wish for growth within the inter connectivity of man and woman. if you were to read the article for what it is and not for how it relates to you you would see that it is to empower men and has a slight air of chastism to woman for thinking they could be goddesses with out men to support and see them that way. i run a home preschool with my lady, have long and passionately powerful conversations with her, raise my children with love and gentility but teach them with firm dicipline, i build everything from boxes to houses, plant gardens and still find time to play video games. i am man, and stiil this article inspires me to grow. look for the flaws in yourself and you will grow. and ps stereotypically more men sit on the couch drinking beer and watching tv than men who embody half of what is needed to fix all that is wrong in this world, and it all starts with men and women supporting and strengthening eachother.

  13. Chad Stose says:

    As a man who has male lovers, I always find this kind of discourse to be kind of silly whether it comes from a gay or straight crowd.

    I experience this article as a new age, not yogic, response to a culture wide gender imbalance that occurred in the 80s when women dressed in linebacker shoulder pads to break through the corporate glass ceiling and masculinity was torn to shreds by second wave feminism. The flavor of this article reminds me of hearing John Friend talk about Lakshmi's "ripe pendulous breasts that even my gay friends admire" at the Anusara Advanced Intensive in LA a few years back. To the point, I invite us to be cautious and default to a larger perspective.

    When I partner with another man, our bodies are pretty similar, so it's a great reminder for me, and really all of us, that we have these two energies within each of us and through our attentiveness and cultivation, we can find a balance that works for us. This is a very personal experience. For further reading, I highly recommend the book, Gender Outlaw by Kate Bornstein.

    Adding the extra labels, "Divine" or "Sacred," seems counter intuitive, and these labels are regrettably overused and create extra barriers to an authentically stripped down practice – an attempt to look at our reality, as it is. These energies are basic and not complicated. We make them more complicated than need be by giving them such labels as if they were somehow beyond normal, yet they are a part of our basic nature.

  14. Paul Hess says:

    I don't understand why anyone needs to be called a god or goddess. The thriving men's movement does not feel a need to call men gods. So why is there a goddess movement? The politics behind this is a feminist politics that actually believes women are morally superior to men. As Lola Jone said, "Worshipping the goddess is usually just an attempt to overthrow the masculine. This is based on a simplistic theory of patriarchy, which claims that men as a whole have more power and privilege. This has been thoroughly refuted by Warren Farrell and others, with almost total resistance from feminists to hearing that–there just is hardly any rational conversation at all. So who wants to be really honest, get the facts and really come from the heart? In 12 years of raising this issue, not many people are willing to admit they were wrong and look at their assumptions and motives in order to create better connection between men and women.

  15. Sean Cameron says:

    Wow… The sheer terror this article obviously inspires in so many men really underlines the problem; guys often are scared shitless when femininity challenges them. The redirection into argumentative comments and intellectualizing is blatantly insecure. Also helps me understand something I’ve been wondering for awhile: In the men’s circles I attend, I sometimes feel like a loner for actually having an amazing and healthy relationship with a woman.

    Here’s the thing guys, when they make these calls and you bitch and whine and justify and avoid, it breaks womens’ hearts. Plain and simple. They are not out to get us, and we do just as good a job at twisting ourselves into something unusual as they ever try to. They just NEED this from us in a way that is intrinsic to their nature… or at least that is what makes sense to me and clicks with what my heart feels.

    Nothing will hit you repeatedly in the face, screaming “Wake the fuck up and deal with your shit!!” more than having a deep, caring, intense and intimate relationship with an amazing woman… That’s just the way it is and yes it is scary shit but c’mon… they are worth it 🙂

  16. Chris says:

    Nicole · 1 day ago
    You do realize "ravish" means "rape"?

    That is a potential definition.

    To overwhelm with emotion; enrapture.
    To give great delight to . . .

    As soon as you start talking 'Rape', men will be put off by this. Our sex is subjugated enough!
    It is NOT rape – Is it just 'being a man' – And letting the woman know she is the presence of a real man.

  17. Sean Cameron, women readers are surely cheering you on. I would love to use some of your comments in my next piece, which is "What the men had to say to the Call to the Sacred Masculine." I've had dozens of private emails too–some angry and defensive, others like yours, appreciative and reflective. Please also FB friend me if we are not yet connected on FB.

  18. Paul–are you saying that men do not dominate in polictical office and they have not historically been paid more for the same job? I don't think you are suggesting this, but I am not sure what you are saying. I will look at who Warren Farrell is, and what he has written, but let's not forget that women only in this century got the right to vote! As for worshipping the Goddess being about overthowing men, I don't see that–first off, women really are not worshipping the goddess as much as invoking their own inner-divinity to the forefront. It's not about a power OVER others but accessing a power within ourselves–just as men too have a non-mundance (numinous) aspect to who they are as well. Call it God, Hero, King, or whatever you will, it is simply the invitation for a higher archetypal nature to come into action within the lives of men, and women.

  19. Hello Chad–please read my reply to the fellow below to understand what I mean by Sacred and Divine. In the meantime, I love this line of yours "women dressed in linebacker shoulder pads to break through the corporate glass ceiling and masculinity was torn to shreds by second wave feminism." It made me smile. And yes, masc and fem are not about gender, but about qualities in each gender. Yet as you have surely experienced in bed with your man, polarity happens because one of you (even though in a man's body) will be accessing more of the feminine current. This is key–and my invitation is not just for men to become more macho–in fact I ask them to care deeply/weep, which is a more feminine trait. The call to the Sacred Masculine, if you read it carefully, is a call to a 360 degree, or integral man. You would likely enjoy this piece by me as well- -http://www.elephantjournal.com/2012/03/the-rise-and-fall-of-the-rapacious-woman-lori-ann-lothian/

  20. LOL on the performance anxiety. It's not really a fantasy of mine, these ten invitations, it's simply my yearning for what might be possible in well rounded masculine. By the way, i've invited some men to write their call to the feminine and I look forward to seeing what a 360 degree woman might look like

  21. Thank you for the reference. I will check it out.

  22. Thank you for your non-defensive response. Your attitude is not so common it seems, and I am heartened by it.

  23. YOu sound angry. Very angry. I would suggest this article has triggered something in you that needs to be looked at. What in the piece threatens your sense of manhood?

  24. If you read the piece, there are many "feminine" traits I call a man to own–care deeply (tender hearted), just one. I am asking for a man to be 360 degree human–I am asking the same of women (by saying, sitting around in goddess circles and excluding men is not healthy or effective). It is interesting to see how people read into this piece what was not written, but rather take from it what they want or need to see in order to stay angry and defensive.

  25. Picture a man giving such a list to women.

    I've asked a few men to do just that. I want to know what a man wants.

    The piece is not a demand or prescription–it is an invitation. It is not about telling a man to be something. It is about revealling to men what women yearn to experience in their men.

  26. Hi yogasamurai–this love ninja is not writing from a personal angst–my man is many of these expressions already. The trigger for this piece was two fold–a beautiful image of a man, taken by a male photographer, that captured my imagination and heart. And walking through the Palm Springs airport last month and seeing so many men coming into town to golf, and seeing that in my mind, they were recreating over creating–that they had taken leisure and pleasure to be goals over constructive potency in the world. This of course, is a projection. But it triggered my creativity and this piece.

  27. Thank you willian for sharing your blog.

  28. Thanks for a balanced reply.

  29. Paul says:

    That seems pretty dismissive given that numerous men have reacted that way. You've struck a chord in the experience of men with women who are overbearing, condescending, demanding and feel morally superior. You started out by saying this not happening, that it is a glaring absence, rather than appreciation for the men that do the things you like and men's movement that is handling this. The things you say are good, i think you would find a lot of agreement and I is good to know you are thinking about this and intending to help. But there is a subtle/blatant difference in attitude that can change your results. 😉

  30. trueayurveda says:

    Identification. Attachment. Non-contentment to the point of action. "inviting" the external to change due to one's expectations and hopes or rather desires. What does this have to do with yoga or divine or sacred?

  31. Paul says:

    That is an interesting guy you mention: here is my comment on his blog about his book.

    The theme of your book is great: living in the head versus the body. But your characterization of the problem as male consciousness, is full of landmines for anyone interested in creating connection and love in the world. It sounds so far like a theory of patriarchy that blames men. So men are inherently evil, is the default explanation here, although proponents of this view deny it.

    A better explanation of gender is found in Warren Farrell’s book, The Myth of Male Power. The real issues is societies based on assumptions of scarcity and fear, which lead to hierarchies in which men have to perform and females help select the performers who are worthy of breeding under sex as procreation. Farrell’s evolutionary view is an alternative to the simple essentialism of the theory of patriarchy, even held among people who call themselves social constructionists.

  32. trueayurveda says:

    Thanks for speaking up to the same story repeated again.

  33. Paul says:

    Good points. And Judgment: be this, do that.

  34. We lead lives at the ultimate and proximate level–to "transcend" the here and now is missing what matters. It's a playground, this thing called life. It's not to be fixed, but rearragned, re-inevented, rediscovered. I for one, post my own awakening, have felt no desire to sit on a mountain top removed from the world. I am content. But I am also playfully drawn to action….this piece was not written from a place of personal agnst…it was written from a place of creative freedom.

  35. grow up says:

    I'm going through a break up… so I'll just say I'm a little bit out of sorts. In our relationship I was the one doing all of the communicating, inviting, getting vulnerable. yet it was all the faults that I owned that she now gets to rest in due to her doing no work on herself. I opened up and now I'm pissed that I opened up to someone who couldn't/ wouldn't meet me.
    I'm not sure it's my masculine that being threatened, it's more that I don't think it's a mans job to open a women up. it's as if Walt Disney princesses have all grown up to be new age spiritual goddesses.
    I do regret putting negativity on your wall. I was in it big time when I read your words and yes it spun me out for sure. so for that deepest apologies.

  36. Dancing Warrior says:

    Perhaps we all need to find both the God and the Goddess in ourselves…we are beings of polarity and paradox, magic in our many guises. And we all have the right to call forth the divine in ourselvesfirst, then in others. I am female here and now, but I have within me aspects of both Goddess and God. And so do every one of us. Namaste

  37. DancingWarrior says:

    I am curious, Jonathan; do you have a website? I agree than Lori Ann really got it right here. I am trying to understand my fiance so that I can pursue my path while maintaining our relationship; part of this is explaining what I need as well from him and this article will help alot, I believe.

  38. Dancing Warrior says:

    With consenting partners, ravishing can also mean a full surrendering to one's own, as well as another's, passion and desire. I have been raped, and I have been ravished. A lover who can truly ravish would be stopped by 'no'.

  39. morpheus says:

    real men and women don't send their kids to school/prison or homeschool them coercing them to bend to their will forcing them to learn anything and they don't leave their kids in cribs screaming all night they let their kids sleep with them in bed with them

  40. yogasamurai says:

    I think a lot of people – women as well as men by the way, you seem to have missed that – are just reacting to a certain presumptuousness on that part of the author. And that's entirely appropriate, as is your reaction, because it speaks to you

    Ultimately it's a two way "call." All powerful love relationships that endure – and aren't simply one-sided Muse-like enchantments – are mutual challenges, and mutual elicitations. Sometime the man starts the dance, sometimes the woman. Cheers

  41. yogasamurai says:


    One caveat, though: there are lots of female golfers, and increasingly golf heroines – Michele Yie, among them, who are role models. I don't golf, but lots of people swear by it, and find precision, grace, majesty – and a deep calm – in its practice.

    One of the finest spiritual books I have ever read — Golf in the Kingdom — written by the man who founded the Esalen Institute — makes the powerful case that golf practiced the old way – as originally intended – is a profoundly spiritual activity that can actually enlighten the practitioner.

    Perhaps the modern, commercialized leisure sport of golf that you sensed in the airport isn't much different from the modern commercialized leisure sport of yoga that one so often sees in the fitness studio.

    "they had taken leisure and pleasure to be goals over constructive potency in the world." No kidding!

  42. Jonathan says:

    As a man I saw it as exactly that – an invitation – and an acknowledgement that we need to work together to overcome our collective mistakes. Once I would have puked a load of bile in response. Today I ache to create this in my life. But while I am finding my way, as a man trying to break free, I need your (woman's) help:

    Show me all of you – not just the parts you think I can handle
    Don't try to fix or run from my vulnerability because it seems too deep to bear
    Trust me to be a good father and don't try to make me do it your way
    Let me be wrong and trust that I will find my way back to being right again
    Trust me to take care of you, and take risks with me
    Let me know when it's not right with respect and dignity

  43. Great ideas and thanks! I do take umbridge with the crack against the Superwoman and Fairy Godmother archetypes though – they are both alive and well in our modern world albeit not always in obvious ways. http://archetypist.com/2010/03/25/ofgm-original-f

  44. Jeff Brown says:

    I just love this piece. Many of my brothers are having a hard time clarifying what an awakening man looks like, feels like, moves like. Trapped as we are in a survivalist consciousness, with one hyper-vigilant eye on the door and another mistaking accumulation for safety, we seldom step out from behind our wall of armour to consider other pathways of possibility. Lori Ann’s piece helps to bridge the gender-ation gap between the world we know best and the next step man, a tenderling warrior who is readying to do the hard work (divine perspiration!) to honor his truth-aches and swap his quest for egoic success for something more authentic- the path of the in-powered, inclusive, receptive heart.

    In words I used long ago, I look forward to the day when we can meet one another in our true nakedness, stripped free of unresolved emotions, pain-induced projections, the distortions of duality. For too long we have been on opposite sides of the river, the bridge between our hearts washed away by a flood of pain. But the time has come to construct a new bridge, one that comes into being with each step we take, one that is fortified with benevolent intentions and authentic self-revealing. As we walk toward one another, our emotional armour falls to the ground, transforming into the light at its source. And when we are ready, we walk right into the Godself at the centre of the bridge, puzzled that we ever imagined ourselves separate.

  45. […] was inspired and challenged by the provocative elephant journal article A Call to the Sacred Masculine: Ten Daring Invitations from the Divine Feminine that recently made the viral rounds on […]

  46. Erik says:

    This is the kind of new age, naive nonsense that sounds to me like bloated heterosexual ego fantasies that belong more to eHarmony than to anything truly sacred.

    Particularly troubling to me is this desire to have men meet women "heart first." What? How condescending, and how blind to centuries and centuries and centuries of men who have brought (and bring) enormous heart to life and to the world. It's condescending, because it's like me sending an invitation to women to meet men head-first – as in, come on! have a brain!, and a sterling intellect.

    And what about gay men? I have no interest in ravishing a woman. None. This whole "Sacred Masculine" stuff as it stands is just an ego extension of the gender wars, a power struggle between opposites. If you were actually writing about something sacred and divine, gender would not even enter into this, and it would read very differently. It would be a much wider and deeper vision, rather than this quite limited and insulting vision.

    Lastly, virtually everything you've mentioned is through a vision of empowerment that is almost exclusively Heroic in nature. As broadly as that can be played out, it's still a limited view of life. It's 1 myth, 1 archetype, and a vision of a truly "sacred masculine" (or "sacred feminine") must reach much further and much wider and be far more encompassing of diversity and variety. It would move beyond the merely heroic and its desire to slay demons, "hunt" darkness, and shine light all over the place is almost the opposite of something sacred or divine, because the divine is a mystery. Going into the darkness and bringing light removes the mystery, blinds us further, and limits sacredness to what can be seen. Rather than hunting demons in the dark, maybe stop demonizing the dark. We live in a global world, 1/2 of which is always in darkness – non-demonic darkness. Step outside of all of the heroics, because that's the place to begin envisioning a "sacred masculine," and you'd really be onto something.

  47. Jeff, what strikes me most from your reply is your lack of defense. What I have noticed more than anything is how this piece either hits men as a possible inspiration, or it hits them like a punch to the solar plexus, as if I am telling them what is wrong with who they are in the world. I sat outside with a former boyfriend, a trained counselor, who gave me some suggestions in an first draft to soften the piece by making sure it was clear that this was an INVITATION, not a DEMAND or PRESCRIPTION. Yet, two days after the piece was published, he confessed even he was triggered emotionally by the "call" and had to deal with his own sense of inadequacy. This saddens me, because of course, communication shuts down when emotional wound/story puts up a wall of defense. Thank you from this feminine heart, for your openess and wisdom.

  48. Your points are fantastic and yes, of course this piece misses the mark for non-hetero unions. I wrote it from a hetero view for a hetero audience. To say however that this is not "sacred" because it addresses only the hetero-dynamic in the interplay of masculine and feminine, is to say that a piece of the puzzle is not valuable without the whole. Each piece matters–homo, hetero, androgyny, sexuality, celibacy, and more. But for this piece to to be inclusive of the gay dyanamic it would be a book, not an article that is aimed at one slice of the pie.

    Yes, to your comment we need not demonize the dark. I was using language to be provacative and hyperbolic. You would be surprised at how non-dual I really am. 🙂 I also love the Jung quote on this, "One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious." It's in that spirit I meant for the man to stalk his demons and to bring them into the light for loving and healing.

    Again, your comments are received and duly noted with gratitude.