July 9, 2012

How to do a Modern Day Ritual. ~ Emelia Symington Fedy

Photo: Håkan Dahlström

A 10 step ritual.

So first off, this really works, so be careful. Do it by yourself or with friends, but do it with all your heart.

Secondly, don’t wish for a unicorn as a pet or a black baby if you are white.

This is not about believing in miracles.

This is about believing in yourself.

Step 1.

Write down what you are most longing for.

Why you are longing for it?

When do you want to get it?

Why are ready for it?

Be specific.

For example: I want to meet a man within the calendar year who wants to marry me and who I want to marry. He lives in the same country as me. He speaks the same language. I think he is hot. He is taller than me. He has a job.

Step 2.

Find something that is valuable to you in some way, symbolic or otherwise.

I have used jewelry from my childhood or a special rock or seashell from my most amazing vacation ever. Use something that you will be sad to let go of.

Photo: sethanikeem

Step 3.

Go to a place that is sacred to you or beautiful in some way.

The ocean, a forest, the dock at a cabin, outside at night on a bridge looking up at the moon. Bring your writing with the prayer on it and the thing of value.

Step 4.

Take out your valuable item and hold it in both your hands.

Bow your head.


Give the symbol all your attention.

Praying out loud is good too.

The most important thing here is your fervor.

Give that symbol your guts.

Say your prayer.

An example: 

Dear____, I am asking for ____. I long for this because _____. I am ready for it now because _____.

Step 5.

Take a deep breath and throw the symbol away. Throw it as far away from you as possible.

Watch it go.

Step 6.

Now say “I will know that my prayer has been answered when I am sent a sign that I cannot deny.”

For example, this is what happened when I did the ritual.

I walked out onto a long thin rickety dock far into the ocean. There was light turquoise water under me, a few fishermen at the mid point, but I walked right to the tip of the dock. I said my prayer. “Please bring him to me. I am ready. Bring me my husband with a band of gold to show me it’s truly him.”

I threw three brass bracelets I had had stolen off a raver girls beach towel at the dregs of a full moon party the morning before. I coveted those pretty things. But I was also ashamed of my moment of assholeness so I wanted them to be turned into something good. I threw the stolen bracelets into the ocean and I watched them sink.

“Bring him to me,” I prayed.

Photo: Vee-vee

Soon after I met my man he gave me a ring. When I looked closer it was actually three separate bands that were linked together at the back. It was the exact replica of the three bracelets I had thrown into the ocean except they were in ring form.

I was sent a sign that I could not deny.

Step 7.

If it is appropriate, bring your hands and knees to the ground and touch your forehead to the earth.

Give thanks.

Bow three times if you would like. Patterns are nice in these sorts of situations.

Step 8.

Now comes the most important part. Walk away.

Let it all go.

Try to believe that your longing is being taken care of so now all you have to do is…

Step 9.

Relax. Let loose.

This is important because relaxation about something makes the thing more interested in you.

Your dream is speeding towards you now…so you can finally chill the f*** out. I usually enjoy eating pizza or smoking smokes.

Photo: Tonatiuh Jaguar

Step 10.

Walk away. The ritual is complete.

Again, be careful because you might just get what you most long for.

My man has surpassed anything I could have ever imagined in terms of being loved. From the moment we met he has brought me necklaces, earrings, hats, coats, tables, photos, letters, scarves, crystal, treasures that sparkle and shine. He showers me in gifts. And that’s what I wanted.

I asked to be showered with love. It’s hard to handle sometimes let me tell you.

It is uncomfortable.

That much love being directed at me.

I mean it.

It is hard to let that much love in when you have been scrambling for it for so long. It’s like, getting stuffed with sunshine after living in northern Russia for years. It hurts its so bright.

But I wanted it, secretly and then loudly, and so it came.

Whatever you long for, you deserve. Whatever your heart desires, you will have.

What you believe in—exists.

*Please send me your stories of rituals coming true. I would love to hear them.


Emelia is a yogi, theatre maker and writer. She is also the creator of the popular offbeat site tryingtobegood.com


Editor: Elysha Anderson


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