December 3, 2012

9+1 Differences: My Warrior in Fullness vs. My Warrior in Shadow. ~ David Esotica


Photo: Hans Splinter

“We live in a time when people are generally uncomfortable with the Warrior form of masculine energy—and for good reasons.

Women are especially uncomfortable with it, because they have often been the most direct victims of it in its shadow form. This is the age in the West of the ‘soft masculine,’ and it is a time in which radical feminists raise loud and hostile voices against the Warrior energy.”

~ Robert Moore, King, Warrior, Magician, Lover

The moment before the movement. Before moving. To strike. To cut. To pierce deeply. To penetrate, and to kill.

To write from this place, poised and present. Senses heightened and ready. There is no choice but to look at blinding light directly. Fear and excitement are entwined. They innovate my limbs with soft intricacy.

This is the power of the masculine warrior. He is driven by courage, discipline and bloodlust. My own journey has included the acceptance of this energy. It has been most difficult.

Like many, my life was touched by the long shadows of the broken warrior. My family was cut into pieces by a senseless civil war, and I lived under the painful darkness of my father’s demons.

Indeed, we live in a time when the Warrior energy is oppressed.

To take action with pure, overwhelming power strikes fear. At times I struggle to come to terms with the pain that has been caused by this energy in shadow. It tore my homeland apart. It killed millions of my people. It violated countless women and children.

And yet, I do not believe that it is a power to be repressed. It is to be encouraged, nurtured and honored. I understand why it is treated with suspicion. However, I cannot deny a force that is deep inside me. In my flesh and my bones.

What defines my Warrior in its fullness is the intent of my purpose. My sovereigns are my strength, my discipline and my love. My power is governed by my integrity and my compassion. I understand the fine line between fear and madness. That is the genesis of this piece.

In the East, the number nine is a divine symbol of masculinity.

And thus, nine symbols of the Warrior in his fullness.

1. The Warrior in his fullness is devoted to a truth that is greater than himself. He is committed to a service that he immerses himself in. The shadow is limited by his own selfish needs.

2. The Warrior strikes in the face of his fear and passion. He turns his irrational presence into measured aggression and bloodlust. The shadow is consumed by it, driven into it.

3. The Warrior strikes cleanly and swiftly. He knows where and how to cut. He cuts deeply and decisively. The shadow flails his power and wounds all those around him.

4. The Warrior acts from a devotion to protect. He lives in service to his mission, and will only act when his sovereign is threatened. The shadow is devoted to devour, and serve himself through the desecration of others.

5. The Warrior is ready to kill with deep love and compassion. He holds the sacredness of life close to his heart and is humbled by the shadow of death. The shadow is ready to torture with great cruelty, and believes himself to be immortal.

6. The Warrior is a destroyer, but only to carve room for newness to spring. Wounds are opened and life is extinguished, but blood and ashes cultivates life. The shadow finds pleasure in the destruction, and takes pleasure in the pain and suffering.

7. The Warrior has great discipline over his mind and his consciousness. He purifies and fortifies the foundations of his identity. The shadow is narcissistic and unlearned.

8. The Warrior is deeply connected, and pays homage to his feelings and grief. To be of service, he must see blood. He looks at pain in the eye. The shadow is closed from himself and his world, and takes delight in suffering.

9. The Warrior cultivates his deepest spirit. His actions are touched by his mission, towards service and divinity. Through death, he serves life. The shadow cultivates his own ends. He does not grow into the richer sources of being.

What may strike you is that both the Warrior and his shadow will be hard to discern.

They both take action. They both cut, and they both kill. What separates them is purpose, compassion and discipline. This takes time and practice to recognize. If the Warrior in his fullness is not well known, he will be mistaken for his dark brother.

The great distinction between the Warrior in his fullness, and his shadow, I quote Hagakure:

“The Way of the Warrior lies in death.”

To be one with death and in it find the richness of life.

To devote my life to what I serve until my death.

To protect what I love at the cost of my life.

To kill and to kill with compassion.

To strike with discipline and bloodlust and sow the seeds of new beginnings.

To be one with my death, the death of my mortal flesh and cluttered mind. To drop into an ocean of emptiness, where life and love sprout from eternal springs.


David Esotica works with his partner, Diana, to help women find the earth shattering relationships they crave.They believe in laughing, crying, passion and orgasms. So you can imagine what happens when they talk about sex.  Check out David’s Facebook page Red Silk and his blog David Esotica.



Editor: Anne Clendening


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