I’m fairly indifferent when it comes to Valentine’s Day.
When I’m single, I appreciate the fact that no one is trying to get me fat by berating me with boxes of chocolate. When I’m in a relationship, it’s nice to have an excuse to drink fancy wine and spend an absurd amount of money at Victoria’s Secret. But if you’re feeling pressure this February due to our culture’s undying love for rampant consumerism, don’t worry—I’ve got your back, Boulder.
1. Yoga accessories. Anything with a Buddha on it or made by Prana. Consider a natural rubber mat or blocks made from renewable bamboo because any other material just screams, “I care about you as much as I care about the planet.” Also, nothing says “I love you” like $90 yoga pants from Lululemon. I mean really, you’re doing both parties a favor here.
2. A Boulder food basket. Assemble a variety of wines, organic teas and gluten-free snacks from Whole Foods. Top it with a gift card to Ozo Coffee so your valentine can fulfill their Bhakti chai addiction. Don’t forget, this basket better be handcrafted out of recycled material.
3. BANFF Mountain Film Festival Tickets. What’s the second best thing to being hardcore outdoorsy? Watching other people do it! The BANFF Mountain Film Festival will be playing at the Boulder Theater on Feb. 26 and 27. Come see how drinking Red Bull, owning $1,000+ worth of North Face jackets and wearing a GoPro can transform you into the Yvon Chouinard of your generation!
4. A Bouquet of nuts. Arrange them like flowers in a vase full of chalk and Clif Bars to impress your climber valentine. However, what they really need is a mani/pedi. (Seriously, I can’t think of anyone who’s hands and feet deserve to be pampered more than a climber living in Boulder.)
5. BolderBOULDER Registration.
Pay for your valentine to participate in the largest race in the country and the fifth largest race in the world! However, it’s also one of the most expensive 10ks, costing between $50—$75 depending on how many tee shirts you want (a must-have staple for all Boulderite wardrobes). You can register online or at the 29th street mall. Consider it insurance that your valentine won’t get fat between now and Memorial Day.
6. Bike accessories. Fill their CamelBak with energy gels, a multi-tool, chamois butter and spare tubes. Personally, I like the BLAZE Bike Light—in addition to super-bright LEDs, it also has a unique projection feature that projects the symbol of a bike down onto the road so cyclists don’t get trapped in drivers’ blind spots.
Also, as cheesy as this may be, I thought the concept of this Verizon commercial was romantic. Any guy that can crush heart-shaped Strava segments is pretty rad in my book.
Things to Do
1. The Ice Rink is running a $3 admission, $2 skate rental special from 2 p.m. to 7 p.m.
2. Leaf Vegetarian Restaurant is doing a four course meal for $40 a person, includes vegan, vegetarian and raw options with sparkling wine.
3. The Dushanbe Teahouse is a tea house that was handcrafted in Tajikistan. They are doing a four course prix fix dinner for $45 a person, which includes a glass of sparking wine or a pot of house tea.
5. The Kitchen [NEXT DOOR] is throwing an anti-Valentine’s Day 80’s Dance Party from 9 p.m. to close. Enjoy half-priced pitchers of microbrews, while DJ Jahsonic spins your favorite songs from the 80’s. Whether you’re single or dating, come check out a bunch of drunk twenty-somethings dance to overplayed 80’s music and dress like slutty Madonna.
6. Opening Night of the Boulder International Film Festival. Glam it up at this black tie affair. For $65 (or free for Passholders), enjoy two different parties at two different venues! The first one starts at the Hotel Boulderado from 5:30 p.m. to 7 p.m. and will feature free drinks, live music, an aerial performance by the Frequent Fliers and chocolates by Seth Ellis Chocolatier. At 7:30 p.m., the doors open at the Boulder Theater with Muscle Shoals, a film featured in Sundance 2013 that will make everyone in the theater feel uncomfortable about being an entitled white person:
“During the most incendiary period of racial hostility,white and black folks came together in Muscle Shoals, Alabama, to create music that would last for generations. At the heart of the story is Rick Hall. Overcoming crushing hardship, he managed to entice talent like Aretha Franklin and Wilson Pickett to come and record what became their hit albums, backed up by the funkiest white men ever—the homegrown house band, the Swampers. As the word spread about the electrifying musical chemistry in this unexpected place, the likes of Bob Dylan, the Rolling Stones, the Staples Singers, the Allman Brothers Band, Lynyrd Skynyrd and Simon & Garfunkel magnetically followed suit. Interviewing an incredible roster of musicians, the filmmaker unearths a rich history of this unheralded gold mine of American music.”
7. The Museum of Broken Relationships. Starting at 6:30 p.m., join the Boulder Museum of Contemporary Art (BMoCA) for a complimentary chocolate and champagne reception for the launch of their latest exhibit, Museum of Broken Relationships:
“In a throwaway consumer society, where everything is disposable, upgradable, and replaceable, items that remind us of past relationships rank particularly low on our personal value scale. The common response or advice for dealing with a breakup is to dispose of everything that reminds us of the other person and to get over him or her as quickly as possible, with the fact that the relationship did not last taken as self-evidence that this was not “the right one.” So what to do with the formerly cherished objects that carried so much personal meaning and emotions when the relationship is over? Demoted to the mundane reality of their original purpose or stripped of their ceremonial significance, these remnants are reduced to their often-negligible material value. Even precious stones and luxury items become useless or painful reminders of the hope and aspirations they once symbolized. Holding on to them can keep us hostage to a no longer desirable past, while disposing of them may seem like treason against our emotional history.”
Sidni Giordano is a freelance journalist with an insatiable curiosity and a full-blown Bhakti chai addiction. When she’s not writing or getting lost in the mountains, you can usually find her talking to homeless people on Pearl Street. Find her on Twitter.
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Assist Ed: Sara Crolick
Ed: Bryonie Wise