January 5, 2014

10 Things Every Woman Should Know (But Probably Doesn’t).

Rejected? That’s okay.

Let’s get right to it.

Here we go.

1. Unpainted toenails are the bomb-diggity.

Seriously. They are.

I understand having stained nails from former polish experiments (and why this might prevent us from going bare), but trust me when I say there is almost no better feeling than wonderfully cared for and pedicured feet with unpainted piggies to gaze at as your yoga practice drishti. Try it.

2. I like my grays.

When I tell people that I let my hair go natural for several reasons—one of which was that I had no idea if I even had any gray hair—only to discover that I have several, I get the same reaction nearly every time: looks of sad empathy.

Then this switches to puzzlement when I relay with a sincere smile across my face that I love them.

To me, they are marks of my life aging perfectly along with my spirit and mind. To me, they are sexy and womanly and the funniest thing of all? I’m so proud of my grays, but, most of the time, no one even notices them.

3. Confidence really is sexy.

Okay, to be fair, we probably have all heard this one, but many of us still need to put it into practice in our own lives: finding the joy and love for the bodies we inhabit—in this moment, right now—is not only liberating, it promotes confidence, which is damn sexy.

4. We might be able to rock kids’ shoes.

This one is for the ladies who wear a size eight or under: we can wear some kids’ shoes.

I just discovered this when taking my daughter for a new pair of tennis shoes—even New Balances in the kids’ shoe stores will fit a woman’s size eight or less.

The best part is that the shoes are exactly the stinkin’ same—but the price isn’t (that’s a lot less).

5. It’s okay to like sex.

Alright, this is another one that hopefully we know—but do we really?

Our society wants to make women who enjoy and seek sex appear as something shameful or sinful—well, I’m here to let all women know that it’s okay to be into sex.

6. It’s okay to have never read 50 Shades of Grey.

It’s also perfectly fine to have read it, but I’ve never read this book and, guess what? I don’t give a damn.

7. Being single is awesome.

I’ve been in a relationship since I was 14 (I’m married to him now). I’ve been told before that I don’t have the ability—coming from this place—to say that it’s awesome to be single. However, I disagree.

Yes, being in a relationship is amazing. Yet, being single because we haven’t met the right partner—what the hell is wrong with that too?

Nothing, that’s what.

8. We can be feminine feminists.

Yes we can wear red lipstick and frilly dresses and still hop up onto our soapboxes to sing the power of the female.

Here, read this.

9. We don’t owe anyone emoticons, apologies or exclamation points!

My college minor was in sociology and one of the most fascinating things I studied was that women often belittle themselves and make themselves appear less superior, even in their writing styles.

So we want to use an exclamation mark? Then use it!

At the same time, it can be empowering to pay more attention to how and where we use language—both verbal and written—to appease others or make ourselves seem less aggressive.

10. We should “stand like a man.”

Men often stand with their feet planted firmly hip-width apart or wider—and this is a stance that not only conveys confidence, it encourages it within your body. (It’s a science-y, physiology thing. Google it.)

Taking note of our postures—and how they can be used to make us come across as smaller (and I’m not talking about actual, physical size)—is one huge way to get in touch with personal power and confidence.

For one day, try standing with feet apart and arms to the sides. (And see how it feels.) 

Bonus: It’s cool to like Disney princesses.

At least, it’s absolutely stellar to like this one: Princess Merida from Brave.

Watch it if you haven’t already.


Relephant reads:

How to Love a Strong & Complicated Woman.
 8 Tips How to Love a Woman, From A Woman.
Date a Woman Who Knows Everything (& Nothing). 

Editor: Catherine Monkman

Photo: Katie Tegtmeyer/Flickr




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Chandni Sep 7, 2015 3:16pm

I agree with some of the comments… being single can be fun and awesome only for a period of time… its not a bad thing to be single. But human nature- we are always going to want a partner sooner or later. I respect your intentions of making women feel good about their lives… but complimenting singles when you are happily married to the love of your life you met since you were 14 plus kids… kinda hard to take your advice on the whole singles vibes.

heather Sep 7, 2015 11:13am

My grays/whites are my sparkles. It is much more comfortable to stand “like a man.” My body feels centered and stable.

Kim Jan 23, 2015 6:18pm

Being single is awesome……for a time. However when that time rolls into years, it isn't that awesome anymore. I do suppose for someone in a relationship it is viewed differently. It's similar to the mother who says 'this single parenting gig isn't too bad' when their partner is away for a week or two and returns.
Theorizing the experience is completely different to living the experience!

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Jennifer S. White

Jennifer S. White is a voracious reader, obsessive writer, passionate yoga instructor and drinker of hoppy ales. She’s also a devoted mama and wife (a stay-at-home yogi). She considers herself to be one of the funniest people who ever lived and she’s also an identical twin. In addition to her work on elephant journal, Jennifer has over 40 articles published on the wellness website MindBodyGreen and her yoga-themed column Your Personal Yogi ran in the newspaper Toledo Free Press. She holds a Bachelor’s degree in geology, absolutely no degrees in anything related to literature, and she currently owns a wheel of cheese. If you want to learn more about Jennifer, make sure to check out her writing, as she’s finally put her tendencies to over-think and over-share to good use. Jennifer is the author of The Best Day of Your Life, available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble. She’s also as excited as a five year old to announce the release of her second book, The Art of Parenting: Love Letters from a Mother, available on Amazon.