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June 1, 2014

“Didn’t expect my fortune cookie to be so insightful.”

Imgur: http://i.imgur.com/4syFThE.jpg

Image via (Reddit, imgur.com)

Ain’t that the truth.

This fortune cookie reminds me of a valuable lesson I learned recently. It’s called “Drive all blames into one” and it has changed my relationships at work and at home.

I’m still trying to wrap my head around the phrase, and by no means have I mastered it, but I know it’s powerful. As I’ve come to understand it, “Drive all blames into one” goes something like this…

1. Sh*t hits the fan.

2. I take blame for said sh*t hitting the fan (even if I’m tempted to place the blame on someone else).

3. The other person(s) involved also take blame for the disaster (even though they know it was my fault).

4. Instead of all of us trying to get rid of the hot potato, otherwise known as blame, we come up with solutions, fix the problem, learn from the situation and move on.

Overall, this process saves time and energy. The problem doesn’t turn into a personal argument, it stays rational and becomes a learning experience.

Now, sometimes this can be difficult. Especially when we are 99.9999% positive it wasn’t our fault. But, this is when we need to acknowledge our ego, tell it to be quiet and try accepting the blame. I promise, you’ll be pleasantly surprised with the results.

Welp, that was my 101 version of “Drive all blames into one.” For a more detailed and eloquent version, check out this article written by Waylon’s mom (she rocks):

>> Buddhadharma In Everyday Life. Lojong Slogan: Drive all Blames into One. 

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Another great article to reference:

>> Cultivating Mindfulness: The Spirituality of Daily Life.

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The aphorism on the fortune cookie is by Polish writer Stanislaw Jerzy Lec.

Here are some of Lec’s other aphorisms:

Beyond each corner new directions lie in wait.

The exit is usually where the entrance was.

You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories.

All is in the hands of man. Therefore wash them often.

The first condition of immortality is death.

 ~

Relephant photo:

Imgur

 

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Love elephant and want to go steady?

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