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June 25, 2014

The Nicest Way to Dump a Lover. ~ Ashleigh Hitchcock

I'm just not feelin' it.

Being direct is kind.

Breaking up is a process, not an event.

One day I met the handsomest, most datable, best catch of a guy I’d ever encountered. And, he was so nice. Tim Taylor was never in short supply of girlfriends. Of course, he always had a long line of ladies in waiting.

I asked him about his best method for letting girls off the hook.

He looked at me with his big, green eyes and simply told me his breakup line.

“I’m just not feelin’ it.”

Genius!

This line is clear, expresses feelings and the dumper assumes all responsibility. I tucked this bit of information, neatly, into the back of my mind, to use for my next break-up.

The next boy I got sick of, I tried it out. I thought I would be all set. Surprisingly, he had a comeback.

He asked me,

“What aren’t you feeling.”

I quickly had to assess my feelings. I admitted to him that I was not feeling attracted to him.

That was that. I simply replaced the it with a feeling. It is that plain.

The one kindness I gave him was to own my feelings and tell him. Period.

Breaking up is this easy!

Or, there’s always the bus.

 

 

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Editor: Renée Picard

Photo: Shelley Panzarella at Flickr

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