Everything is uncertain.
I remember the first time I heard the term “making friends with uncertainty.”
It was so freeing—the idea that this was even an option.
The idea that uncertainty wasn’t something we needed to fight, overcome or be better than. That things in life not going the way I wanted or planned for wasn’t my fault. That instead I could choose to view uncertainty as my friend or even my ally.
What this meant for me was that life could be easier, and even more importantly that change was not a sign of failure.
It just is.
Change just is.
It is out of our control, it is going to happen. It is here to stay.
So why not be its friend?
I use to think that life was an upward plane. You start at the bottom and you move your way up until you get to exactly where you want to be and once there you get to stay forever. You arrive where you want to be and then you just get to be happy.
And I couldn’t wait to get there.
I was in a dire rush, to tell you the truth.
But unfortunately, there was always an obstacle in the way. The need for a little more money, a couple improvements to relationships, a lot more respect for myself.
Now I see that these weren’t obstacles. They are actually the meat of the experience itself. They are actually the whole deal. They are my life. They are the being there.
I have shed more than a few tears over the death of my imaginary ending point. Having to let go of the dream of the ability to get to one stage of life where everything feels okay has been one of the hardest things for me to let go of.
But I now see that life is not an upward plane at all, but a journey with peaks and valleys—sometimes within seconds of each other.
The downs are not a sign of failure and the ups are not a sign of success. They both just represent a normal journey.
It all depends how I choose to see it.
Love elephant and want to go steady?
Editor: Emily Bartran
Photo: Nicu Buculei/Flickr