December 16, 2014

Candid Ad for a Dog Who is “Kind of a little jerk.”

eddie bad to the bone

Nobody’s perfect. Definitely not sweet, terrible Eddie.

Silicon Valley’s humane society published an honest blog about one of their highly unadoptable dogs, Eddie. They’re making no bones about it—the perfect home for this sweet but terrible dog has a few requirements.

Straight from their blog (read the full version here):

“We know, we know. He is adorable.

While Eddie The Terrible has never actually attacked another dog, he’s made it abundantly clear that he hasn’t ruled out the possibility. He goes from zero to Cujo in .05 seconds when he sees another dog on leash. 

We’re pretty sure somewhere out there exists someone patient enough to work with him on this or someone who frankly doesn’t give a bean if he likes to scream his head off for a few seconds at the neighbor’s lab. But in the interest of full disclosure, we have to be honest.

So let’s talk about the bed. Or the sofa. Or someplace that you generally like to hang out because that’s where Eddie’s going to want to bunk. A bed in your room? Awesome. In the bed with you? Better. In a crate? Let him sing you the song of his people…

In fact if you’re looking for a floor-sleeping, speed bump of a dog that minds his own business, strike Eddie clean off your list.

Let’s face it: unless you’re looking for a dog that’s a little bit of work, Eddie The Terrible is not the dog for you. We know, we know. He’s super loyal, easy in the house and a lot of fun but he’s a little rough around the edges. Actually he’s kind of a jerk. But he’s a jerk we believe in. We’re not expecting you to want to meet him but if you must, we really can’t deter you.

If you love a challenge, are looking for the dog of a lifetime and think you can handle the thirteen pounds of terror that is Eddie, we won’t stop you.”

And then they released a video of Eddie, just to be sure they were clear:

I’m not sure whether Eddie was born on the wrong side of the bed, or he was (as many with bad attitudes are) sadly abused or neglected.

What I do know is that now is the time people start thinking about animals as gifts. Nothing like a big, lively box with air holes to make the kids go wild on Christmas morning. Then, December 28th hits and the shine wears off.

We adopted a puppy ourselves (who is now three) from the humane society—she was “returned because the kids were fighting.” (AKA: abandoning a family member as a form of punishment.) To be honest, I’ve thought about dropping my 15-year-old off at the humane society too, but I digress…

In many ways, a puppy is more work than a baby. We still fought over potty training, and we were prepared and expecting to put in some work.

So please, skip the live animals as gifts. For those of us needing a furry fix, check out volunteer opportunities instead. It’s hard enough to find homes for perfect little doggy angels, never mind the Eddies of the world.

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Catherine Monkman  |  Contribution: 118,720