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March 20, 2015

Three Tips About Parenting Teenagers—You Must Know!

parent with teenagerParents with Children

 

Editor’s note: Astrology isn’t a religion. We’re not sure it’s a science, either. It’s magic, maybe. But, as with feng shui, say, things affect things. So as long as we don’t go blaming our problems on the stars, as long as we assume responsibility for our own actions…well, hell, a little auspicious coincidence and applicable wisdom can’t hurt. And so, with that grain of salt…enjoy!

 

Do you remember the sh*t you use to do as a kid?

There is no greater responsibility than being a parent, especially in this crazy world we live in. So, it might be helpful to know when we should pay special attention to the needs of our children. One of the best ways to do that is to look at your horoscope and see what planets are transiting the 5th House of your chart, which rules your children.

When Saturn transits this house, our children often become a source of restriction, difficulty or burden to us. While having children is a blessing, raising them and meeting their needs carries with it great responsibility. During the two and a half years of Saturn’s transit, we may find that children make heavy demands on us that require us to accept even more than the usual responsibilities for their care.

Since the 5th House concerns both the sex that we may enjoy in a romantic relationship and children, please note that Saturn’s transit here forces us to be responsible not only for our sex life, but theirs, too—or face the consequences. Not being sexually responsible can result in an unwanted pregnancy occurring during this transit. Therefore, if Saturn is transiting here and we have adolescent children, make sure to discuss the topic of responsible sex with them. If a person is single and involved in a sexual relationship—with no desire to have children—they should make sure to use contraception during this period of their life.

The 8th House, quite importantly, governs sex, one’s behavior and attitude towards sex, sexual desires and sexual drive. However, sex in the 5th House of our birth chart is where we (and our children) may experience pro-creational or recreational sex. This is when our children may become aware of the power of their sexuality and its impact on their life.

When Saturn transits in our 5th House (or even in your children’s 5th and 8th Houses), they will likely learn lessons about the way sex functions in relationships and regard sex in a more serious manner, whether they are having it or not. Saturn’s energies demand that we be accountable for our sexual behavior or pay the consequences

This was a lesson that my client’s son learned. He was in his senior year of high school and like any teenager his testosterone levels were doing backflips. His new girlfriend was sweet and playful, but very naïve. They started going to parties and hanging out together, and they began to engage in kissing and heavy petting. Even though he pushed his girlfriend to go further, she always stopped him, reminding him she was a virgin and wanted to stay that way.

One evening they came back to her house after a party and her parents were already in bed. As they sat down on the couch and had some sodas, the young man complained that they needed to “spice up” their drinks. He was able to talk his girlfriend into raiding her parents’ liquor cabinet and pouring some rum into their colas. Soon they were both drunk and they started kissing and touching and one thing led to another. The next thing they knew was they were having unprotected sex. It didn’t take long for them sober up enough to realize what they had done.

A month later a test showed that she was pregnant.

Saturn was transiting his father’s 5th House and his son’s 8th House. Now this young man was about to learn a lesson about being sexually irresponsible.

A Time to “Man Up” and Be a Responsible Parent

Saturn as a teacher, demands that we be accountable for our behavior. When it transits our 5th House, it often brings parents tests and lessons that teach them to take greater responsibility for the care of their children. Here’s one parent’s experience under this transit.

He wanted to be a good father to his two young children now that he was divorced from their mother. The truth was his former wife had always taken responsibility for spending time with their children while he worked late at the office or played golf with his buddies. Now that he was spending time with his kids as a single dad, he realized how little he knew about taking care of children and entertaining them. It was obvious to him that he’d been a selfish parent, focusing only on his life, not theirs. He loved his kids and was ready to accept the responsibility of being an attentive father.

To get a greater education, he stopped off at a bookstore and picked up a book on parenting. Next week, he would make an appointment to meet with his children’s teachers at their school. There was no question his efforts to be a more responsible parent would mean he’d have to change his lifestyle. But he was finally ready to be more of a father to his children.

Over-Idealizing Leads to Mis-perceiving

When Saturn visits our 5th House of children, in some way, we end up taking more responsibility for our children. In contrast, under the spell of the transiting planet Neptune, a parent can often feel so much for love for their children that they turn a “blind eye” and may not perceive their kids personalities accurately. If they aren’t careful they will have a tendency to over-idealize them, which may result in incorrectly recognizing their true behavior.

They end up surprised, finding their children’s behavior strange and their actions confusing. During this transit, parents are well advised to make sure their antennae are “up,” sensitive to any unusual behavior their children exhibit, especially their use of drugs, alcohol or other addictions. One parent was only seeing an illusion of his son when Neptune transited his 5th house.

As a parent, he was a supportive and generous father, helping his struggling son, who was trying to find a job as a comedy writer in Los Angeles. For months he paid his son’s rent, sent a living allowance, and paid for writing classes. His son assured his father he was working at a part-time job to help pay expenses and was spending his nights writing comedy.

Each week when his father called to get the latest news, he told him things were looking promising and that it was just a matter of time when he’d land a writing job. The following week, his father was on business in San Francisco, so he decided to catch a quick flight to L.A. and surprise his son. When he walked into his son’s apartment mid-day, he was the one who got the surprise. The door to his son’s apartment was wide open. The place looked like a pigsty with empty bottles and pizza boxes scattered all over, reeking of the smell of marijuana.

Lying on the couch were two half-dressed women in a deep sleep. Lying on the reclining chair was his son, face down and totally naked. It looked like the remains of a party where people had gotten “wasted” on drugs and alcohol. Clearly there was a lot he didn’t know about what was going on in his son’s life.

Of course, there are many positives that can occur in the lives of our children when we have transits of Saturn and Neptune going through our 5th House. However, it’s important to be aware of the more challenging ways these transits can affect our children.

During these planets’ long passage through your 5th house, be sure to spend lots of time together to promote good communication between you and your child, having open discussions and clearing up any misunderstandings that occur. Lastly, follow your intuition where it concerns your children’s behavior and actions. If you sense that there is something amiss, be willing to confront any problems you imagine or are concerned about. As the old adage goes: “an once of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

 

Find out if Saturn or Neptune, or other personal transits are affecting the lives of your children, right now by going to the Free Transit Calculator and entering your birth date. Or, learn about your child’s horoscope by entering their birth date. And, if you’re curious to learn more about your personal Horoscope or your child’s Horoscope in 2015: Order your customized Report: Your Horoscope & Future in 2015.

 

Relephant: 

The Care & Feeding of Teens.

 

Author: Larry Schwimmer

Editor: Renée Picard

Photo: provided by author 

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