May 8, 2015

The Things Moms Think but Won’t Admit.

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If you are a mom and have thought to yourself, “Sometimes I don’t want to be a mother anymore,” then you are in good company.

We moms totally get it.

We share the overwhelm, isolation and fretfulness that arrive in those first few weeks.

We too long for the days of brunch dates, yoga classes and grown-up movies on our own schedule.

We yearn for a full night’s sleep, a long, hot shower and a well-balanced home-cooked meal.

We crave real adult conversations that aren’t about baby poo, Elmo or jarred versus homemade.

We navigate the new landscape of our bodies that have become foreign to us, wrought with sore nipples, hair loss and lax lady bits.

Universally, we all pine for just one day where we can untether ourselves and do something else, anything else, that’s just ours.

Yet, we rarely connect and share these thoughts and experiences with each other.

We tuck these feelings away out of shame, withering in our own shadows.

We desperately cling to the romantic notion of motherhood while feeling like we aren’t good enough.

We tell each other with forced smiles and anxious chuckles, “Motherhood is a lot of work, but it’s worth it,” almost as if we’re trying to convince ourselves.

Why do we do this? This behavior is damaging. It holds us back from our true potential as mothers and as women.

We need to be bold and admit, “Motherhood is the hardest thing I’ve ever done and some days it doesn’t feel worth it.”

Because when we put it all out there, when we get honest with each other, we have the opportunity to manifest a community that will give us immense, palpable support.

We owe it to ourselves, in this new vocation, to garner genuine information from others who are experiencing the same thing. Let’s dive deep into real-life motherhood together and encourage each other. Let’s share what we feel to reassure each other that we are not alone in this. When we do, we will have more strength to persevere on the worst days and a community to celebrate the best days.

Motherhood can then transform from living day-by-day to offering us a vehicle for a life with deeper meaning. And not only because of what we learn from our new precious baby, but because of what we have learned about ourselves from the women around us.

Maybe then we will be able to look at each other in the eye and say with our deepest hearts, “Motherhood is hard, but you made it worth it.”


Author: Kristin Bundy

Editor: Alli Sarazen

Photo: Robert W. Howington/ Flickr


Relephant read:

What I Wish I’d Known when I Became a Mom.

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Kristin Bundy