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February 8, 2016

Fold Along the Dotted Lines. {Poem}

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Fold along the dotted lines

Paint within the designated space

Color in by the numbers

Make lists, lots of lists

Begin everyday with lists

End every night with more “to dos” you need to get around to doing

Write faster

Write as fast as your mind is spinning

Pour all the traffic in your brain onto the page

Accomplish something each day; no–not just something, lots of things

Be productive.

Learn. Feed your brain everyday

Learn something new everyday.

 

Don’t put off the things on your to do list that trigger you. Just do them.

Don’t lie in bed. And if you must, read.

Don’t sit on the couch and play games on your phone.

Don’t read gossip websites

Don’t stalk your ex-boyfriend.

Don’t check his watsapp, his facebook, his instagram

Don’t check when he was last online

Don’t listen to what he is listening to on spotify.

Don’t try on your fancy dresses and look at yourself in the mirror.

Don’t play pretend, spinning dialogues and debates out loud

Don’t talk to yourself in the mirror

Don’t drink wine alone, eating copious amount of spring rolls, watching British detective shows.

Don’t forget to focus on your breathing.

Don’t forget to take longer…deeper…breaths.

Don’t flow.

Don’t allow.

 

Stop.

Exhausted.

Get f*cked up.

Emotional outbursts. Eruptions

Lose control.

Go to extremes.

Go beyond socially acceptable behavior. And then go further.

Find others who are equally repressed

Equally burdened by the same thought patterns

And let loose

Let loose together.

Take drugs. Take lots of drugs. Try everything.

Ones that speed things up

Ones that slow   things   down.

Psychedelics

Plant medicines

Develop preferences for certain drugs.

Get creative. Invent even more extravagant ways to let loose

Push radically against your mental, emotional and physical boundaries,

until you’ve completely lost yourself

And then go even further.

 

Until,

Heart sore and rattled,

Stop.

Change comes quietly and softly

Just allow.

Allow

Allow

Allow

Allow the fear

Allow the self-doubt

Allow the pain

Allow the darkness

Allow the anger

And release the resentment

Allow yourself to be overwhelmed

Then breathe.

And give into the powerlessness,

And stay.

 

Just do what you can today and allow

Remember the important things, like time with friends

And looking up at trees when walking through the park

Just do what you can

Just let things be

Just let things happen

Just let writing happen, even if it is shit.

Hope will come

Joy will come

Love will come

Connection will come

But first allow,

And make space

Loosen that grip

Allow breath

Breathe.

Just breathe.

Just be.

 

 

Relephant:

F*ck it, This is How We should Live.

 

~

Author: Jennifer Yeh

Apprentice Editor: Tammy Novak  / Editor: Renée Picard

Image credit: Paullita, Pixabay.com

~

 

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