October 21, 2016

The Secret to Going With the Flow.

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For years, I was mislabeled by men as a “fly by the seat of my pants” kind of gal.

At times, I probably even seemed to lack control.

I eat one mammoth and Bacchanalian feast each day, complete with wine and without a care or concern for the calories.

My joie de vivre dictates that a splash of sultry hedonism embodies my soul. From nude sunbathing to hugging absolutely everyone I meet—though not both at the same time—there is an undeniable sensualist within me.

Even so, onlookers were incorrect with the assumption that I lack structure, control or any kind of planwhen I begin my days.

When it comes to life organization, Woody Allen has says it best: “If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.”

We have a choice to either scribe a to do list or improvise our days. Either way, one thing is certain: if we don’t embrace change with a fresh attitude, we will never be able to accept the flow of our destiny, nor will we feel at peace. Plans must often be rewritten as we navigate our life experiences. Again and again, we are shown that nothing lasts forever—not our deepest pain or our happiest moments.

We head to the grocery store with a note for fresh basil. However, when we can’t find it we might find ourselves in a panic. We waste time meandering the shop’s aisles like one lost little lamb, convinced they’ll now go hungry or that their dish is ruined. Some may even get angry at something so minuscule, going from zero to 200 in less than 60 seconds—full throttle.

Whether it’s a surface set of plans or the deeper things that didn’t work out for us as we’d intended, we are reminded constantly by bumper stickers and Facebook posts that life happens. 

But without a lust for change, it’s hard to accept.

So here is a little tip about what fuels me along each day:

No two sunrises, fingerprints, children, bike rides, or even renditions of our favorite food dish are the same. When experiencing anything—small or large—we must be aware of its uniqueness.

We must be present to the fact that we shall never be gifted that precise “dance” again. Even if we go for almond milk ice cream each afternoon and buy from the same stand or store, our exact experience will differ, if even by a fraction, from our day before.

Everything in the world changes.

Knowing this, it becomes easy to roll with the pace and space we’re so blessed to be in at any given time and to make the most of that moment.

It’s via a stance of zaftig or warm and zealous appreciation for all that we get to do, that an ability to find the good is birthed. We embrace the rhythm we’re given a little more when choosing excitement and gratitude for “change!”

Life will come and go, and when our environment or external circumstances don’t go as we had planned we can jump in and recognize that we’ve got a shot to enjoy that sacred experience—daunting or challenging as it may seem—or we can waste the opportunity placed in front of us.

Of course, we’re free to choose, but life gets mighty fun when change is looked at with arousal instead of fear.

We must remember too, that many of the best things in life have come about by accident or via some unexpected change of plans.

It was a blind Benedictine monk in the 1700’s by the name of Dom Perignon who was making his traditional wine but due to heat, odd fermentation and residual sugars acting out their own ballet or adjustment to climatic and storage conditions, some bubbles occurred. And that winemaker, possessing quite a palate, tasted and remarked, “Ahh, come quickly! I’m tasting stars!”

Many eras later, Champagne would, of course, become the drink for the “stars” and lovers, as well as the libation of choice for celebrations and special occasions of all kinds. Had the man poured his carbonated mistake out the window, however, then just where would we bubbly appreciators be today?

So it’s by valuing the impromptu change of script, rolling with each move and groove we get long enough to see where it goes and writing a new list, carving a new plan, and having some sultry whimsy and curiosity as to the possibilities all around us that make going with the flow feel pretty lucid and natural.

And choosing to respond in this way is an act of control, marked by intention, and so no flying by the seat of careless anythings is involved in that way of living at all.

Growth is unequivocally about a love of life, a zest and a verve of boundless gratitude, an appetite, an openness, a desire and a lustful spirit to experience authentic things versus an edited, airbrushed and perfectly “planned” set of circumstances.

We learn, we change, and that contagious change only helps us to connect with more and more people and creatures on earth.

To dwell on what did not work out is not only counterproductive but keeps us in our own state of depression.

Rather than bemoan how amuck our latest plans turned out, finding the humor, the silver lining and the newness or once in a lifetime experience component of whatever we face can become fun.

Instead of fearing the work and mental rewiring that must be applied when a new plan is needed, we can decide to feel lucky, honored, humbled and flattered, or called upon to suavely jump in. We’re being a gifted a role as Wonder Woman or James Bond for a day!

We have a chance to be spontaneous and even extemporaneous in how we’ll interface and speak with those who are a part of our new and exciting situation.

Yes, we are fortunate when plans didn’t follow the same predictable path—the result is some newfound freedom and a chance for creativity.

We can forget our toted script or teleprompter in the mind, as everything is different and we get to charter and make up some of that as we go along.

We get to dance however we wish and see fit, versus delivering something rehearsed.

We get to play!

So the next time our plans get jumbled up, may we look up at the effervescent stars and simply say,

“How lucky are we!”



Author: Laurie-Beth Robbins

Image: Suzette at Flickr 

Apprentice Editor: Molly Murphy; Editor: Renee Picard

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