After an exhausting election season, we’re now left to grapple with an even more exhausting result.
Unreal. I didn’t know how hollow I could feel, until now. I left my house this morning and it felt like the last batch of leaves had suddenly fallen overnight. The trees and streets felt as empty as I did. The sting of change—for better or worse—was in the air.
I felt extremely self-conscious while waiting for the bus, as if I were seeing other people for the first time. As if I was not use to seeing strangers. This morning, strangers seemed even stranger. I felt like I wanted to reach out to every person I saw, give them a hug and say, “It’s okay.” Only because I think I needed to hear it. I think we all need a hug and reassurance right now.
But what we need even more is to keep our heads up and our hearts out.
Despite the shock and disappointment in my bones, I am feeling extremely empowered and inspired. Why would America electing an openly sexist, racist, xenophobe, sexual assaulting megalomaniac as our next president inspire and empower me, you ask? Well, good question!
It’s because now I have no other choice but to say that my gloves are off. I’m done playing small. The dire consequences of me playing small are right in front of my eyes and they have come in the form of Donald Trump and all that he represents.
I’m done. I’m done biting my lip when I hear words about other humans from mouths that are operating on a fear and hate-based mindset. I’m done biting my lip for fear of disturbing the peace (there is obviously no more peace here to disturb).
I’m done adhering to my own insecurities and fears as a young, immigrant woman living in the United States.
I’m done debating what I can and cannot do or what can and cannot be done.
I’m done giving my time and energy to people and things who are not helping me grow into a more aware human being, who is consciously engaged with society in a healthy, positive way.
I’m done settling.
I’m done giving up.
I’m done playing a victim.
I’m done feeling sorry for myself.
I’m done feeling powerless and hopeless.
I’m done being the wings Donald Trump has unknowlingly flown on.
I’m done accepting the status quo.
I’m done putting things off.
I’m done procrastinating.
I’m done thinking I don’t have the time to do my soul’s work.
I’m done being confused about my purpose, about my worth, about everything.
I’m done accepting anything less than love from myself and from others.
I’m done with a lot of things. But this doesn’t mean I’m done with America.
I refuse to direct hate in any direction right now. I’m also done being a source of hate for anything or anyone, even toward Trump or Trump supporters. I’m done falling for that trap.
“Hate, it has caused a lot of problems in the world, but has not solved one yet.” ~ Maya Angelou
I am completely focused on directing my energy toward cultivating my inner peace so that I have the strength to continue to grow and spread as much love in my little corner of the Universe as possible.
Who’s with me?
Let’s keep the faith.
Let’s love each other and ourselves harder than ever.
Let’s show love.
This is not a call for fear and hate.
This is an urgent call for love and understanding to radiate from our bones!
There’s lots of work to be done.
Author: Marta Cataniciu
Image: flickr/Jeslee Cuizon
Editor: Ashleigh Hitchcock