Who we think we are was programmed into us, usually at a young age, by other people following their own program.
This program decides who we are, what we can have, and how far—or stuck—we will get in life. Our abundance, self-worth and happiness are being decided by something that’s not true, has nothing to do with us, and is making not only ourselves, but everyone around us miserable and stressed.
Another way to put it is that the ego mind took all the information available, a lot from our parents and culture, and wrote a script, a part for us to play. This script was written with limited information and misses the truth and the most important part of us. We learned our part, which is based on the parts of others, and began to live it. We played the part well and begin to forget that it’s not really us. It was handed to us. We are free to walk away and choose a different role anytime.
I was born to an unmarried, controlling, teenage mother. I was not wanted. My script said I was unworthy, no good, and I had to try and make others happy. Mainly, I was a big victim. I unconsciously kept trying to make the script work and to find some way to be happy in that part. It was impossible. I finally realized I had to completely let the role go, that none of it was true and I would never find any peace there.
I began to realize the script is our default program. When we live unconsciously, the mind keeps presenting the script, or lines, for what we do next, how we react, or what choices we have. And we blindly follow it, never realizing what we are following really isn’t us and is the reason for our unhappiness.
I came to the point where something had to change. I realized what had to change was me and the role I was playing. The first step was awareness. I began to see the role, or program, that I had been blindly following. I watched the choices, the solutions and how my mind strategized and always went outside of me for answers. The more aware I became of the role I had taken on, the more choice I had to say no, to go a different way. I began to feel more at peace and I began to choose that peace more often.
As I began to let go of the programmed role, my mind went crazy, and filled with fear: “This is who you are. Come back.” I began to realize my ego was the role. In giving up the role, I gave up my ego mind. I saw how it took every ounce of energy I had to maintain that role and all I got out of it was stress and unhappiness.
As I gave up the role, peace was just there. I began to see that it had always been there. This peace felt like finally coming home. This peace is who we really are and who we are meant to be.
Author: Lisa Greene
Image: Flickr/Dave Parker
Editor: Travis May