June 4, 2017

An Open Letter To Every Man: This is How I Love You.

Let me just say, I have a dream, and I know I’m not the only one.

I have a dream to one day live in a world where there is no more war, no more fighting, no more power struggles, and no more suffering. I would also like to say that I know this will not happen just through painting rainbows in the sky or going for rides on a sparkly unicorn.

This sh*t takes work. Work of the innermost kind. Healing humanity means standing strong for each other while we are here on this Earth. And that is what I am here to do. To all people of the male persuasion, this one’s for you.

Dear Men,

I’m going to tell you something right off the bat. Please do not let it scare you. I know we have been taught that this phrase is reserved for the few precious and closest people in our lives, but I’d like your to unlearn this and find this way of using it in life.

I see this phrase as one to be shared in abundance; to be spoken every day. Saying something many times can either make it lose strength or it can gain power and force with each syllable uttered. When spoken from the heart in a way that is truly felt, words can change the world.

So here it is: I love you.

Yes. First and foremost, that is what I want you to know. I love you.

It’s true that I may not “like” some of you—but regardless of that, I still love you.

And I know, my lack of liking you is just illuminating a place in myself that needs some attention. I heard someone say once that unconditional love is a phrase that doesn’t make sense because true love never has conditions. So putting the word unconditional next to love is unnecessary, as love is complete unto itself. In the past, I would have said “I love you” unconditionally, but now I can simply say “I love you” without overthinking it.

Now, I’m curious. How do you feel when I say “I love you” like this? Can you feel it? Do you trust me? This is not such an easy thing for me to state, you know, but I would never say it unless I really meant it. Choosing to love those who have tortured my soul through betrayal, rape, and other games of external power is not a step that is easy to take. But I’ve come to a place now where I can see that the torture and betrayal we have witnessed and been the victim of is what leads us to perpetuate these hurtful acts.

Now I understand: We’re here to help each other heal, to help each other grow, to help each other see more clearly. We are at a place in the history of time when this is actually a possibility.

As we do this for each other, I will be right over here, loving your whole soul in all of its nooks and crannies, all its corners and deep dark wells. I will love every part that you show me—and I’ll also love every part that you don’t show me. And maybe one day all those places in yourself you’ve kept hidden from the world will spill forth from your being, brought out into the light to be witnessed in love. And then, I’ll be someplace at that time, loving you from near or far.

I want you to know that there is no need anymore to keep yourself hidden from the world. Because you are the world. The whole universe lives inside of you and every part of you is part of the whole.

Do you think you could take the leap that might lead you to knowing and loving more parts of yourself? All those pieces that you’ve spent years ignoring and shutting away? This is the way we can change the world—by loving it all. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I believe in you. You can do it. And I’ll be here or somewhere near, cheering you on and holding you strong so you can let it all come up and out to be repurposed into clear integrity and inner strength.

All you have to do is allow yourself the opportunity to be seen. Show me the tenderness that was so visible when you were a child. Show me the joy that is hiding behind your troubled heart. Show me the tears, show me who you truly are from the inside out.

I see you as beauty. I see you as love. You are the sweetness of life itself. All of you is great, all of you is wonderful, all of you is deserving of love. And I, personally, will love you through each moment. Beautiful or (what some may see as) ugly, sweet or sour, angry or joyful; I will love you.

And let me tell you I am not loving you because I want the love to be returned, no, I am loving you because I know it’s what we all really need. Love is what will bring balance back to this whacked out world. Love it what will give us the strength to change these outdated patterns we’ve all been living out for way too long.

I’d like to mention that I know that a lot of you have probably reached a point in your lives where love became something that isn’t a part of what “being a man” is about. So I am here to remind you that this is exactly the opposite of the truth. Being a man is about love.

I am here to help you see that love indeed, is the only reality. All those other things—machismo, hardened hearts, and one ups—these are all illusions created to keep your true self locked away in fear. Being fearful of vulnerability is an illusion that causes so much pain and suffering for yourself and for the world. It’s time to change this belief and we can do this easily by choosing a more vulnerable approach in life. I know you may feel it is not safe for you to be vulnerable with everyone in your life, and that is why I write this letter—so that at least you know it is safe with me.

And for a little extra confidence in the matter, from my own experience, as soon as I am willing to be openly vulnerable with someone, they too begin to lower their guard and healing takes place on both sides. It’s actually quite beautiful (but not alway easy!)

I have lived much of my life with a fear of vulnerability. I didn’t realize it at the time, but it was this fear that was creating many of the negative patterns playing out in my life, and as soon as I chose to step into the role of the vulnerable one, my walls began to cascade down around me, my heart lightened up, and I began to heal on some deep levels.

So now I gently urge you to do the same. Do not be hard on yourself if it doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process to break through the thick layers of our armor.

Making a small commitment to yourself and setting the intention to heal are both great ways to start the journey. And just to remind you again, I will be here for you when you do this. Just like I am here for you right now. This will not change. I will be here and I will be standing in the power of love with an open, vulnerable heart just as I am now.

When you are ready, take the step. Take the plunge and fully embrace who you truly are, a beautiful, light-giving, love holding, courageous man.

I am grateful that you have taken the time to read this. It shows me that we are in this together. You, me, and the universe. All conspiring to create more beauty and spread more love in this big beautiful world.

Thank you. Together we can heal humanity and change the world.

Forever, with love in my heart, with no conditions,

A Loving Woman


Author: Morgan Leigh Callison
Image: YouTube screenshot
Editor: Danielle Beutell

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