This is an ode to the Keyboard Warrior
Who fancies himself the Internet voyeur.
In the shadows he lurks waiting to pounce,
“I want a pound of flesh! Not just an ounce.”
Wronging the rights of all mankind
His goal is to denigrate, to malign
Any and all who stand in his way
Be it man, woman, bi-, or gay.
No one’s off limits when there are important things to say!
With quick taps on the keyboard and little thought in his head
He spews forth insults and put-downs on common-themed threads.
His anger, his sarcasm, his wrath against man
Is perfectly illogical, unjustified—but goes according to plan.
“I am the mighty Keyboard Warrior!” he roars.
“My keyboard is akin to the Great Excalibur’s sword.
The tone of my voice, the strength of my words
Will never get lost in the Internet void.”
“For I know all of the tricks of the trade,
For I am the bully the internet made.
My thoughts are exalted on High.
Just ask me. You know I won’t lie.”
To tell the truth and to set the record straight,
That is the Keyboard Warrior’s mission of late.
“Bow down before me and give the respect I’m due
For I am smarter than all of you!”
And for all of those who received his 40 lashes?
Well, it’s been said that beauty comes from ashes.
The weak shall rise and tremble before him no more.
They will take up their keyboards to even the score.
With words of kindness, pithy and true,
They will show he’s only the Internet’s fool.
Author: Tammy Ellington
Image: Courtney Recker/Unsplash
Editor: Callie Rushton