We all crave change one way or the other. Be it our clothes, our eating habits, our circle of friends. Our jobs, cars, partners, children and so on. We start off, eventually, on our journeys with a bang. Hey, sometimes we might even close that circle with another bang. But what happens in-between? The un-glamourous, sweaty, messy, shaky part that comes during the bangs?!

I was taught from an early age that “results are ALL that matters” and also, “No pain, no gain”! (sounds familiar?!). Growing up hearing this constantly was no easy job. Getting the perfect score in Maths, passing the next karate exam, getting accepted into THAT one particular college. You see where this is going. To make one long story short I became really good at cheating. I cheated my way through college big time. Have attended school for maybe 2 years out of 4. Got passing scores and even came close to a scholarship in my 3rd year (that year where I have actually attended classes). Then same thing happenned to MY eating habits. MY hobbies. MY relationships. They would all start pretty well and somewhere down the road I’d eventually seem to lose interest. Became “unhappy”. Stopped. Complained that things were not going the way I wanted to. Because I would not see any “change/ results” . Then I would complain some more 🙂  Only to move onto something more shinny. More desirable. Something new! Always different. Always looking for the new “best thing”.

Don’t get me wrong, I learnt so much “in the making” that if I could do it all over again I wouldn’t change a thing.  My main take-away after all these years was that the “in-between part” is what really matters. The part that I’d always dread and I would ran away from. Ha! The “boring” part. Like that lunch workout no one knows you’ve squeezed in ’cause you haven’t posted anything on social media about it. Pretty boring, right?!

Now in my late 20’s I took up running. I have never been the “running type”. EVER. I smoked for nearly 15 years (hard to believe, ’cause now it feels like it all happened in a previous lifetime). Then one day I decided to become a non-smoker. And since I discovered that now I had sooo much free time on my hands cause I was not smoking anymore this eventually led me to running. Why running? Cause apart from walking, its literally the one thing you have NO excuse not to do it. You can go for a run wherever you are. No matter the time of the day. The season. The circumstances. And running became eventually my best friend. My therapist. My love. My life. For some years at least. It didn’t start off with a bang that’s for sure. It was so difficult in the beginning. Yet I persisted. Then it slowly it became really fun. Because for once in my life there was no pressure. No results were expected from me, of me and by me. Nor anyone else. No changes required. I took things as they unfolded. And I have to admit I fell in love. Little by little, morning by morning I discovered new things about me while I was running. Ideas started to show up. Projects. People. Places. All while I was running.

Because the magic of taking in things as they unravel with no expectations attached is what makes us feel alive. You see for the first time in 20 something years I had finally stopped putting pressure on myself. And the positive ripple effect was unbelievable. This extended to everything around me: my habits, my relationships, my hobbies, my writing, my work. Slowly and steadily I became more & more present letting go of expectations of how things “should be”. And I would be so intrigued of how much time I used to spend judging, worrying, categorising, sorting, and pressuring people/ things around me. I learnt that every single mile I ran mattered, every imperfect run I would squeeze in on a busy day after work or on an early morning mattered, regardless of how slow or fast it was. No matter what kind of breakfast I had that day. No matter if my running shorts would match my tank top ? it would STILL matter. The person that would come back through the door AFTER a run was so different than the one that went out. More calm. Patient. Tolerant. Warm. Thoughtful. Loving. Enthusiastic. Energetic. All thanks to that “boring part” in the middle ?

So, why not next time when things get “boring”, tedious and you get this urge to stop why not choose to stick around for just a little bit longer. Not much. But do it intentionally. Say to yourself, taking a really big breath in “I’m going to keep doing this 5 more minutes and then see what happens”. That’s it. Then big breath out ? 5 more metres, 5 more reps, 5 more lines.

Because when you draw the line that’s how you make everything happen: by building on this “boring”, unglamorous in-between part, by adding just 5 more intentional breaths to whatever you’re doing.

Yours in mindfully choosing to stick around even when “it sucks” :),

Ileana.

xox

Ileana is an intuitive mentor to free-spirited change makers. Educating through story-telling is her thing. People see Ileana when they want to start a new chapter in their lives and answer the dreaded question “is that ALL there is to IT?”. Much like if Tony Robbins & Esther Hicks would have had a naughty love child then that would be Ileana for sure:-P.

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