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4.6
December 2, 2018

When the world turns its back on you

When the world turns its back on you

Or so it feels

Or seems

Were you always this lost?

You start asking yourself

Were you strong or was that an illusion?

Is life but just an illusion?

What’s an illusion?

Are you turning delusional?

Why does nothing matters anymore?

You keep wondering if your life is coming to an end

And you’re so utterly lonely that you’re even searching your own self

Your lost old self

It all happened so fast

Yet this is going by so slow

Is it just mental health?

Existential crisis?

Midlife?

Traumatic experiences?

Genetics?

What’s missing?

Where are you?

You ask yourself over and over and over until you’re tired of yourself

Was your existence destined to fade away like this?

Slowly dissipating into nothingness

But it wasn’t!

It wasn’t!

Are you not in your body?

Or your mind?

Psychosis?

It’s just too much

Too overwhelming

You tell yourself one thing

At this point, only one thing, let the storm engulf you, let the fire consume you, let yourself drown in the ocean, let it all be

So you let it be

What’re you holding on to when you’ve no supernatural deity to cling to?

When you’ve lost yourself?

What’s it that’s keeping you here?

You stay and you decide to stay to find out

And you know your decision will pay off

You’ll find out

And it’ll be sunshine again

Just stay till then

Just stay

Stay for you’re meant to

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