Your love isn’t who you’re looking for. She, he, they may appear under a very different guise. You may be looking for flash, and quiet may show up. You may be looking for a beautiful poised mature woman from England, say, or France—and a world-traveling young hippie astrologer might show up.
This world has a sense of humor.
She may only show up once, bicycling, a warm front of a human on a cold day.
She may show up the very next day, with a long lover. You may shake your head, and forget her.
She may show up months later, two books set neatly on the round cafe table, her hair falling over her face as she hides—writing against the corner of her table set against the old glowing wood paneled wall.
You may talk to her, first a waterdropped moment, then more.
Then, you may hike with her, your sweet white wet dog sitting in the cool crick while you two dangle your four feet in the water beneath little trees beneath pale blue sky. But you are too old and now is not the time, she swims at 3 am dark in the creek with another lover.
Life is for fun! Timing is everything!
And yet—timing is nothing. If you are, as you are, looking for Powerful—looking for a partner that is a match, not an adornment—you may have to, simultaneously, let go and…learn that craft some call stubborn patience.
I’m good at letting go. I’m not good at waiting.
But my love isn’t who I think I’m looking for. It’s who appears, as if by a kind of ordinary magic, when I’m not looking.
And the trick…
…the key, is to be aware…
…to be awake to the sunshine on her shoulder instead of jogging on into a busy life on a path without the one I wasn’t looking for.
This life can be full of bike rides and world travels and service and midnight swims and children, some day, and farmers markets. Or it can be full of alone.
Either way, the trick…
…the key, is to be open to who you weren’t looking for, when you weren’t looking.
“Those who search for love, only manifest their own lovelessness.” ~ D.H. Lawrence
And, let we get too self-serious—remember to dance in your room foolishly and wildly, like a feral disco metal cat: