I had the most amazing experience this past weekend at my first onsite training to become an Equus Coach. I learned a valuable lesson and skill – speaking from the heart. 

Horses are amazing animals and because they are prey animals, they are highly sensitive to their surroundings. They are also very sensitive to the energy that humans transmit – and this is where my lesson began. 

Let Me Introduce You To Sundance

During my training, I was asked to bring a mare by the name of Sundance into the arena from a neary pasture. Sundance is a gorgeous horse who also happened to be in heat at the time. She was also more than a little pushy. 

Keep in mind that this was my first time working with Sundance. Add to that that I am a rookie at horsemanship and you can probably figure out that I was struggling more than just a little bit! 

Still, I gave it my all, determined to get Sundance from the pasture to the arena without incident.

The weekend began with all of us learning basic horseman skills like asking the horse to do what we want and then continuing to ask until it gets it. 

Well, let me just start by saying that I didn´t do that…

She pushed me and I pushed her back. No requesting – just the two of us pushing and struggling from the get-go. At the bottom of the road, I needed to weave Sundance around the group of my classmates waiting to take on the next exercise. 

The problem was this…Sundance was just not focused! 

Her attention was on one thing, and one thing only – letting me know who she believed the boss in this interaction was and – trust me when I say –  that it was not me! 

Enter Cooper…

Finally, I got Sundance through the narrow gate at the end of the paddock, only for her to spot a tremendously handsome gelding by the name of Cooper. 

Remember I mentioned that Sundance was in heat? Well, this is where she proceeded to tell Cooper (in no uncertain terms, thank you very much!) just how damn sorry she is that he’s a gelding, for crying out loud. By this time, both horses are whinnying up a storm and Sundance is cavorting all around, with me hanging on to my long line for dear life. 

Sundance is excited. Cooper is excited. I´m excited – and by excited, I mean my heart is beating a mile a minute and my sense of danger is escalating by the minute! 

Horses are surrounding me as they flock in from all sides to see what the hell’s going on. Thankfully, all three of my instructors rushed to my side to help me deal with this terribly sticky situation.

Talk about feeling all shook up!

You can imagine what a wild ride my emotions were on – racing from frustrated to scared because for my safety to unbelievably grateful because of just how supportive my own “herd” was being.  

That Aha Moment

I woke up the next morning pretty sure about where this whole event had gone south. I realized that I ́d approached the gathering of Sundance as a task, rather than inviting her to join me on a stroll as a partner. I felt like I ́d failed her and myself. I decided right then and there that when the next opportunity for coaching came up that afternoon, I owed it to both of us to do it this time around. 

And that´s just what I did…

I invited Sundance to join me in the round pen.  She was still just as pushy, and my trainer instructed me once again on how to communicate my request. 

Sundance was full of her sass that morning and, my coach Kasia, after hearing my intention of listening and speaking from the heart, instructed me to go to the center of the round pen and listen to what my heart told me.  

As I stood there with my back to the group, Sundance came along side of me, aligning her heart with mine. We slowly walked around the round pen, our steps almost matching, with no equipment whatsoever. There was no pushing or cajoling from either of us.  

What did you do to Sundance?

After a bit of watching this dance, Kasia asked me to come over to the fence. She asked me “Who are you, and what did you do to Sundance?” 

Believe it or not, this previously antsy, animated horse was now putty in my hands! 

How did this happen?! Well, here’s how…

I allowed myself to be vulnerable, to be authentic and to speak from the heart.

This weekend of experiences showed me where in my life I need to be more open, more vulnerable, more authentic and to speak from my heart. This new herd that I’m so grateful to be a part of, supported me with their hearts and allowed me to be myself. I was able to do the same for them. 

Life can be so much richer and more valuable, if we all just put down our armor, one piece at a time, one layer at a time to reach those in our herd. 

When was the last time you truly allowed yourself to be seen and how are you doing at speaking from the heart? I’d love to hear about it.