This article was written in partnership with Keen.com—they’re dedicated to helping us find clarity through psychic guidance. Whether it’s science or magic, we’re open to most things, if they may be of benefit. ~ ed.
“So ancient is the desire of one another which is implanted in us, reuniting our original nature, seeking to make one of two, and to heal the state of man.” ~ Plato, Symposium
If you want to go down the rabbit hole, just search “twin flames.”
It’s a topic that’s both immensely popular and commonly misinterpreted by a plethora of so-called experts.
So how do those who are curious about this “rare and elusive soul connection” sort myth and misdirection from authentic, genuinely helpful guidance?
I spoke to one of Keen.com’s most popular and well-reviewed psychics, Nicole “Live the Light” Bowman, who is a “no tools” psychic medium, meaning she receives spiritual messages directly. She specializes in love and relationships and I asked her about the most important things we need to know when it comes to the twin flame connection as well as the most common misconceptions.
What she told me was not what you may expect to hear from a psychic—if you have a skeptical, stereotypical view of them, as I used to. However, having experienced several readings with a variety of Keen.com’s advisors, I’m coming to expect this level of grounded clarity and compassionate directness.
As 11/11—the most significant date on the twin flames calendar—has recently passed, I hope what I’ve learned may help clear some confusion around this “deeply intense” and “often disturbing” entanglement some of us experience with our “twins.”
Much of the content available on twin flames these days focuses on this hardship or suffering aspect around a twin flame connection: the longing, the separation, the conflict this connection can stir up within ourselves. But, as I learned, there are also many gifts in this journey, and a profound greater purpose.
First, it’s important to be clear on what makes a twin flame so unique and different from a soul mate, or other kinds of karmic relationships.
We can have many soul mates, but only one twin flame.
“Because of their sheer power and breath-taking catalytic nature, twin flame relationships are often romanticized, idealized, and worshiped in unnecessary and misguided ways just as the false idol is lauded for its imaginary divinity. While the connections that twin flames have are indeed divine, they are also intensely unsettling.” ~ Aletheia Luna
Everyone has soul mates but not everyone has a twin flame. Soul mate relationships are more supportive and comforting. Although they can be challenging at times, this is a connection in which we generally feel at ease. Soul mates can also come in all shapes and sizes—romantic or platonic. A twin flame relationship is rarer and more unique.
The concept of twin flames was developed among ancient philosophers, mystics, and sages. The theory goes that at the moment of a soul’s creation, it’s split into two halves with each exploring a different aspect of being. One side is the divine masculine—the other, the divine feminine.
As such, a twin flame is a true mirror of yourself, which may prove to be both extremely challenging and rewarding. While the relationship may have its difficulties, there is an unconditional love and bond that sticks.
A twin flame is like the ultimate soul mate.
As Live the Light explains, all twin flame relationships aren’t necessarily romantic. This was news to me as it goes against most popular advice online about this kind of connection. The thing is, she says, a twin flame connection may span many lifetimes, depending on the evolution of the souls involved.
A twin flame is your spiritual twin. So, ultimately although powerful attraction to our counterpart is present, it’s not always about sex or romance—it all comes down to energy, because the ultimate purpose of a twin flame connection extends far beyond psychical union.
The deeper purpose of the twin flame connection is each individual’s healing and evolution, which leads to collective healing and evolution. It’s less about the “twins” in this equation and more about the effect their mutual healing and energetic merging can have on the world.
This relationship is truly about service to the world.
“For my heart is as large as a city, and it glows with the fire that, with the right mischievous love, shall serve to inspire thousands upon thousands to inspire thousands upon thousands.” ~ Waylon H. Lewis
The fact that we are in the midst of a collective spiritual awakening is one of the reasons we are seeing a rising awareness and greater emergence of twin flame connections. This particular relationship is just as important for the world and consciousness as a whole as it is for the individuals involved.
This greater purpose is not something we see mentioned often simply because we’re living in a culture of the self. But, equally, many of us are awakening to our deep connectedness with something greater than ourselves. And, as anyone who has experienced or is experiencing an awakening will tell you, this can be an uncomfortable process because it challenges our self-created identity.
If we view the twin flame connection as just about us, it is easy to get lost in the various stages and permutations of the journey.
However, awakening to the greater purpose of this path, if it is yours to take (remember, not everyone has a twin flame), has the power to keep us steady and centered when things start to feel intense or challenging.
One interesting example Live the Light gave of a twin flame connection where this powerful transformative energy has been harnessed to the benefit of many more souls than their own is President Jimmy Carter and his wife, Rosalynn. They have worked tirelessly throughout their lives together to better the world around them.
In order to avoid getting stuck in spiritual materialism and navel gazing, we should keep coming back to this broader view. Of course, it starts with our personal healing, and this is exactly where we can easily get lost…
The false twin flame.
“You fall in love with the whole world when you deeply fall in love with another person.” ~ Deepak Chopra
Some of us can get confused on this journey and end up bonding with the wrong person, over our trauma.
Live the Light reminds us that if we feel we have a twin flame, we should relax our searching, and instead focus on our own healing.
The quickest, most direct way to union, both with our twin flame and divine consciousness as a whole, is to heal our own wounds and develop our own consciousness. Only then, when the time is right, will we be prepared and able to re-enter a soul union with our twin flame, if that is our path—without as much of the intense heartache and painful conflict that is often associated with these relationships.
A true twin flame connection will ultimately inspire two people to do extraordinary things, not only for themselves and one another, but for the whole world.
The significance of 11:11.
“11:11 is the universe knocking itself out to give you evidence of your alignment.” ~ Abraham Hicks
In numerology, 11 is a master number, and more specifically, it’s the root master number, associated with concepts such as spiritual illumination, empathic abilities, supernatural abilities, insight, and intuition.
If you are seeing this number, and asking yourself what it all means, it may be the universe throwing you a sign that you need to pay attention. Essentially, it’s a “heads up,” a poke in the side to pause, take a moment, and become aware of what’s going on.
Reflected as a physical date on the calendar, November 11 is significant because of its powerful energy and as the embodiment of the concept of twin flames mirroring one another. This 11/11, take a moment to witness the magic of your own life, but also recognize there’s a bigger power at play.
As we open your eyes to the synchronicity around us, we may become more aware of the subtle energies and invisible thread that connects us all.
The most important thing is to pay attention, harness the magnetic power of the universe to draw similar energies together, and set your intention.
You do not need your twin flame to become whole.
It is also important to remember that you are whole as you are. The same is true for your twin. However, if and when you do connect, there is a possibility to become a greater whole: with a greater purpose beyond just your relationship.
It’s important to know that you cannot miss your twin flame connection, because you are never really disconnected from them.
However if you have not done the work, it will be harder for you to connect or even recognize them if you do meet.
So, rather than spending your energy seeking your twin flame or trying to figure out how to connect more deeply with them if you feel you have met, focus on yourself.
Go out and build a life! A life you love. Build your business, develop your mind, take care of your body, and honor your spirituality. These things will not only build up your self-esteem they will also give you discernment and allow you to recognize your twin flame if or when they do show up.
Experiences do not need to be forced when they are truly for you. So, live your life and allow what is for you to flow in naturally. What is meant to last will stay.
How psychic guidance can help you on your journey to healing.
(…and, if meant to be, finding and connecting with your twin flame.)
While psychic guidance can be an incredibly powerful support in the twin flame journey, we should engage with it mindfully and from a trusted source.
A trustworthy psychic will always remind you of your own agency and the power of choice in your own future. There is no way to “predict” what will happen when it comes to your twin flame relationship, or anything for that matter. The future’s not set in stone. We create it minute by minute not just through our consciousness but also our physical actions.
Psychics can help with some things though, however as Live the Light points out, it’s important to be clear and know what we want to ask. Think of intuitives or psychics as translators between the reality we can perceive with our senses and the deeper, spiritual reality.
Avoid asking decision based (should I or shouldn’t I) questions, because, ultimately, you need to turn to your own deep inner knowing for the answers to these questions. Seeking guidance is helpful to becoming empowered: realizing that you are loved and supported; you are safe to heal and return to wholeness.
Remember that change and progress is a choice. Your life situation can change dramatically over time, but you have to commit to making the small, empowered choices day to day.
You are more powerful than you think.