*Whether astrology is science or magic, we’re open to most things, if they may be of benefit. ~ Ed.
“Don’t you go to war with yourself
I heard it come through the rain
Don’t you go to war with yourself
How you gonna hold all that pain, oh no.
Let go, let go, let go
Put all of it out of your mind
I know, you know, we know
It’s time now
Put down what you are carrying…”
~ Trevor Hall, “Put Down What You Are Carrying”
We all are carrying so much right now. And, we have been for some time.
We are carrying the pain and grief of the world, of our communities, and of our families.
We have all been holding on to so much. If anything, that is what these times have shown us—how much burden we’ve been carrying like it was our cross to bear.
Perhaps, it is. Perhaps, we feel it is our pain to wrestle with, figure out (whatever that means), and to overcome. But, perhaps, it isn’t about holding onto it as if our life depended upon it. Sometimes, the more we hold onto the pain, stress, and overwhelm, the more it defeats us in the process.
There is a fine line between acknowledging, allowing, and feeling the pain, but also knowing when it is okay to let it go. To let the tension go and flood out of our bodies and our minds like water we keep trying to dam up.
None of this is easy right now. We are all having hard times because this is a hard time. And, we are having joyful and sweet moments, too. We can really see the polarity of experiences right now. Some are in dire need of money and resources to simply feed themselves and their families. Others have the support and resources needed to survive for some time. This is the disparity of the world we live in though. It isn’t new, just more apparent as a whole perhaps.
One person may be experiencing great stress, strife, and challenge amidst these uncertain times. Another may be finding less burden and more freedom in the ability to focus on what matters here and now. We all have varying levels of experience right now, maybe more noticeable than ever before.
We are inundated with information every day, so much so that we lose sight of the moments to tune into the stillness that exists within. No matter what may be truth or illusion, conspiracy or delusion, media mongering of fear or otherwise, we all can feel this.
It’s like being in the ocean with this storm on the surface. Some are fighting each next wave. Some are trying to predict the next wave and find anything to hold onto. Some are floating on the surface either in distraction or checking out, or perhaps meditative contemplation, riding the waves of change. Others may be swimming into the gunk below the surface, seeing what actually is there. Some are being swallowed whole by it.
Others, even still, are swimming to the depths of the ocean, immersing themselves fully in these death and rebirth cycles, allowing themselves to fully surrender into it and let go. They are the deep-sea dwellers, who are less disturbed by the surface water and its fluctuations. We may be experiencing all of these—daily, weekly and monthly.
The Scorpio full moon (May 7, 6:45 a.m. EDT) is drawing us into the depths, if we allow. It can be into the extremes of stress or feeling into the higher octaves of Scorpio energy of love and deep forgiveness. The choice is always ours where we tune into and broadcast from.
Stress may be running high these next few days, but it’s all relative now isn’t it? We may witness members of our family, our loved ones, and our friends having their own set of experiences. We may see the stress and suffering of those we love on fuller display.
We may think we are untouched by this, but we are not. As one suffers, so too we all can feel that same pain, if we are the empathetic, feeling human beings we came here to be. We are all deeply vulnerable and deeply interconnected.
And, perhaps, we feel something because it is a pain we know, too. Scorpio is the sign of transformation and transmutation. It is death and rebirth. It is life as death, and death as life meditation. It’s the realization and walking, waking meditation that death is the initiation into deeper living.
Death shakes us awake, whether in the loss of a loved one or more broadly so, in the lives of our communities and world. Or, more metaphorically, the loss of our world and structures as we know it.
Death says, “Are you living yet?”
“Are you ready to let die all that isn’t you?” Scorpio energy asks deeper of us still.
Scorpio is a water sign, associated with the deep, empathic, sensitive emotional realms. Our emotions can purify us and help us release these heavy burdens we carry. It reminds us how to surrender to the waves and know that we are not those fluctuations.
We are not the waves. We are the ocean of consciousness itself. We forget and we remember. We hold on and we let go. We know duality but does that mean it has to be felt as polarity and friction: a “You’re right and I’m wrong” kind of a thing.
We can acknowledge both sides without the need to fight or overpower ourselves or another. Life does not negate death and death does not negate life. They are one and the same. Flip sides of the same coin.
This full moon comes at a point when we all may be feeling weary of the journey to date and of the journey ahead. Each day is feeling a bit more heavy and monotonous, as if we are never going to see our way out of this. We’ve been swimming in it for some time now, some days drowning in it, some days fighting with it tooth and nail. Other days, wandering a bit more aimlessly.
April, May, and the coming months bring with it even more changes and deep explorations. On April 24, Pluto, the planet of death and rebirth (Scorpio’s ruling planet) began its retrograde motion. This probes deeper reflections and lessons upon our own as well as the collective’s death and rebirth cycles, transformation, and a deep shedding of patterns and habits that no longer are serving us individually, or collectively. We are getting a close look into what parts of self and the collective are ready to be let go, go, go.
Venus, the planet of love, beauty, and money is also going retrograde on May 13. Venus retrogrades once every 19 months. She is here to invite a reflection and reassessment of our values of love, money, and our own self-value. What beliefs about love or money are not actually true or are no longer in service of our highest truth?
Saturn, the planet that rules time, responsibility, structure, government, authority, and hard work, will retrograde beginning May 11. We will be invited to reflect upon how these structures in place are or are not serving us long-term. What changes do we need to make to these structures to create a more responsible system for ourselves and our world?
Jupiter, the planet of travel, exploration, higher education, luck, expansion, and growth, is also going retrograde on May 14. Where are we feeling more limited in our freedoms to explore, travel, and grow outwardly? Where can we find the needed avenues of self-growth closer to home perhaps? It is a time to go within, to connect to one’s inner compass and source within. What power do we need to be reminded of within ourselves? How can we align more with that source of guidance and truth?
These times were not made for the faint of heart. The Scorpio full moon, the last of the supermoons of 2020, will be a deep dive into these transformative times. The world will not look the same after this pandemic is over. We may not look the same after this is over.
In fact, what if we allowed ourselves to not be the same after this is over? What if change was always supposed to happen? And all we had to do was let it? To let go of the fears, the stressors, the burdens and deeply surrender each day as if we already had forgiven ourselves completely for whatever we feel we must hold onto.
What if we were to walk into the world each day as if we already had forgiven and loved ourselves more wholly? What radical changes would that bring? I am sure you can feel the power of that.
We all have a presence to offer the world. That is our purpose and our guiding light. How can I deepen into presence with myself? With this other person, even if it feels so directly opposing to what I want to feel? With this moment, no matter the looks of it?
Scorpio holds little fear of death. We must walk hand in hand with our fears, now. Allow the polarities to find union, to find “yoga” and merge with the other. We can transmute these burdens, but first we must let them go. We do not have to hold onto them. We do not have to identify with them as the whole truth. They are a part of it, yes, but not the whole picture or perspective.
Let us be made anew each day and each moment and remember as best we can. There is no wrong way to do this. There is no guiding map to do so. Just follow the subtle or strong tide within. Bring a flashlight. Bring your heart into the deep oceanic waters. Bring your oxygen mask: your breath. These are your tools now.
Take as much time as needed tomorrow and the coming days to be with yourself. It’s not about feeling badly because you did anything wrong. But, maybe, you can let go a little bit more. Let go of the fight, of the need to know the next step, of the need to fix someone else’s emotional state, or even to “fix” your own, or the need to battle the powers at be.
Step within to the ocean of your heart, the moon’s tides pulling you in, to reflect, to let go of these burdens of the heart and mind you carry. Allow transformation to feel effortless as you sit with yourself in whatever capacity needed, to cry, scream, or grieve.
Death is the gateway to new life. So, put down what you are carrying, dear soul. Let more lightness find you in your being, and know that as truth. Lean into the heaviness with a spacious and kind heart. Let go, go go.