This post is Grassroots, meaning a reader posted it directly. If you see an issue with it, contact an editor.
If you’d like to post a Grassroots post, click here!

0.1
July 24, 2020

How I Decided to Nuke My Life (And Why You Should, Too)

My quarter-life crisis came right at 24.

I was feeling unsatisfied.

Nothing was “wrong,” per se.

I had graduated from a university in the big city close to home, was working a nine to five job in a related field, living with my parents to save money, and traveling as often as I could. 

On the surface, it seemed I was doing everything “right” to kick-start my adult life.

But I didn’t feel challenged. My life felt stagnant. The rose-tinted glasses I graduated with had dissipated as real life took hold.

I think a lot of people feel this way, yet no one talks about how hard it is to find your path when real life begins.  

That’s why in the months leading up to my 25th birthday, I quit my job, ended a serious relationship, and went back to school.

Making such monumental changes felt scary, but in my heart I knew I was following the path that’s meant for me.

And that’s something I hope everyone gets a chance to do. 

I took a career risk.

When one of my closest friends was accepted into a prestigious law school, it made me start seriously thinking about going back to school. Education is a ticket to success. It’s not the only ticket, but I knew it could open up doors for a career in writing that I wouldn’t be able to find otherwise. 

I applied to just one program: the Master of Science in Journalism at Northwestern University.

Northwestern had long been my dream school. As I researched the program, I realized it was the perfect fit for me. Not only is it one of the top journalism programs in the country, it’s also one of the only schools with a specialization for science writing—something I’m deeply passionate about.

The week of Christmas, I got a call letting me know I’d been accepted. But around that same time, I was offered a job with a hefty pay increase and promotion as a communications director for a national nonprofit.

I had to choose between a defined career path and taking on significant debt to go into journalism—what many consider a dying field.

I left a relationship that wasn’t lifting me up.

During this period, I was in a relationship with someone I had known for a long time, someone who cared about me a lot. He may have been right for me at one point, but as I started to make changes and explore new opportunities, it quickly became apparent how different we’d grown. 

Where I saw limitless opportunities to carve out my own path, he saw roadblocks and excuses. I became driven by a relentless optimism that he seemed unable or unwilling to share. It became increasingly obvious that we didn’t share a future. 

I ended things. It was painful to break off, but once I did, I felt ready to focus on myself and move my life forward.

Sometimes love slips out of a relationship and habit takes over. At that moment I’m glad I recognized when it was time to move on. 

Along the way, I encountered signs that I was on the right path.

Leaving a good job and relationship were two of the most stressful decisions I’ve ever faced. I won’t lie, the stress kept me up many nights and ended up making me physically sick for a while. But I kept encountering signs that confirmed I was making the right decisions, and this helped me to keep going. 

Unexplainable coincidences kept occurring. One morning I woke up and the first thought in my head was, “Look into scholarships.” After some Googling, I stumbled upon a highly niche scholarship for which I happened to qualify. The only catch: the deadline was that day.

I somehow managed to apply on time, and I got the scholarship. It covered a significant portion of the tuition, and it ended up being the deciding factor in me enrolling at Northwestern. 

When our souls push us toward something, it’s up to us to follow, even if it makes us uncomfortable for a bit.

If taking the plunge feels scary, that’s good, because that’s what our souls need to grow.

Take solace in knowing there will be signs along the way that confirm you’re on the right path. All you have to do is be open to noticing them.

I fell apart to come back stronger.

It’s been two years since I completely upheaved my life and to be honest, things fell apart for a little.

I was late enrolling in school, and therefore late moving, so I was forced to crash on couches. The stress was greater than I’ve ever faced before. So much so that I dealt with intense physical symptoms for a full year after. 

But I’m already starting to reap the benefits. I met some special people—like-minded friends, my love, and people in high places that may inspire or enable my career. 

Only time will tell how much this decision will impact my career. But it impacted me, as a person.

I learned things about myself. Making these changes gave me the confidence I needed to take control of my own life. It gave me the courage to share my thoughts with the world.

I wouldn’t be writing this if it wasn’t for the journey I’m writing about. 

Everyone’s path is different.

If you’ve read this far, I hope this can be your sign to move to that new city or start up that side hustle you’ve been thinking about.

You are capable and resilient, and you will land on your feet only to stand up even stronger.

~

Leave a Thoughtful Comment
X

Read 0 comments and reply

Top Contributors Latest

Valerie Nikolas  |  Contribution: 1,125

author: Valerie Nikolas

Image:

Editor: Lisa Erickson