Boring, shy, quiet, miserable, unsocial, snobby, prude, loner, are just some of the words I have been called over the years. Why, because I am an introvert. Are you tired of having to explain that and try to make people understand the qualities of introverts?

When you ask people what an extrovert is, most people know. Because extroverts are popular, outgoing, fun, chatty, love being centre of attention. If you ask people what an introvert is, most people stumble, not really sure how to describe one. That is when we hear the words, shy, loner, quiet, unsocial. This is how society has portrayed extroverts and introverts.  Extroverts are happy and lively; introverts are sad and lonely. It’s not fair!

I have nothing against extroverts, and I am grateful for them, as they take attention away from me, which makes me more comfortable. But introverts are fantastic, interesting, thoughtful, inquisitive, fun, social people and we need more people to understand that. If you are an extrovert, you need us! If everyone was an extrovert, you would be fighting to be centre of attention all day, every day. The world needs both, so can we please be understood and accepted in the same way.

Let me share some myths about introverts:

Introverts are not social:

We are social and enjoy being in the company of others. We are just more comfortable in smaller social gatherings.

Introverts are shy and quiet:

While some may be shy, most are not. We will contribute, step up when we feel strongly about something, or feel we have something worthy to say. We prefer to listen and reflect before speaking up.

Introverts are loners:

We are not loners, but we do enjoy time alone. Often after being in a social setting, we crave some time alone to recharge and reflect.

Introverts are miserable:

We are not miserable, we just do not feel the need to be laughing, smiling and talking all of the time. Often, we are deep in thought, or attentively listening.

Introverts are not team players:

We are valuable team players. Where extroverts make decisions quickly and act, introverts will think and reflect. The balance between the two makes a great team. But extroverts, if you have introverts on your team, give them the chance to speak!

Introverts really want to be extroverts:

I speak for myself here, but absolutely not! While it took some time for me to understand my personality, I am totally comfortable being an introvert. I have no deep desire to be the life of the party, be out every night, or the most popular person.

There is another “vert” which is the “ambivert” This describes someone who has both introvert and extrovert qualities.  These people can adapt their personality to the situation easily. Be a good listener or be the team leader. However, I believe sometimes introverts hide behind the word ambivert. Because of how introverts have historically been portrayed, some are still embarrassed to admit they are one and feel that ambiverts are more socially acceptable. There is nothing wrong with being an introvert – be proud!

However, there are many genuine ambiverts and they can teach us much about how each type of personality is valued, and acceptable in today’s world. Being able to adapt to the people around them and make these people feel comfortable is a wonderful quality. I have several ambivert friends. These friends respect who I am and understand me completely!

As an introvert, it is not fun to be called names, put on the spot, or embarrassed by other who have no understanding of who we are. Yet, this still happens, in schools, in the workplace and sometimes even within our families.  Education is key, so as frustrating as it can sometimes be, if you are an introvert, keep teaching others just what that means and embrace and be proud of who you are.