My heart does a flutter and the dopamine surges as I read and wait for the next incoming message and read … waiting in anticipation.

I am ready to date again I ask myself ?

Online is the reality and yet I swear technology has done something to my brain .
Even platonic relationships have my heart fluttering as I wait for messages.

Do they like my recent article or the painting? I am left waiting and wondering and spending way too much time online. I know I am not the only one either .
Messaging is hard and so are the silent no responses , just the smiling face or emoji thumbs up.
I am spending too much time in solitude alone. I swear even the Amazon delivery man is looking attractive.
Am I ready for the back and forth messaging I ask myself and that crazy whirlwind feeling? Yes , I say even though there is a ache and  physical sensation I feel waiting for what comes after the …

Covid has also done a crazy thing to my brain. It has made me live life in a frenzy trying to do and achieve fearing that time is running out. I’m afraid that this will be the same with dating.

Honestly, it has been two years since I kissed my ex goodbye .

For two years I’ve been celibate.

I sigh, “ the ache in places where I use to play”is a lyric by Cohen that I now understand on a deeper level.

I have a plan for this.

I’m going to dive in and rip off the bandaid. I’m getting out of my own way.
Online dating is the start and so is scheduling and commitment.

I mean seriously, manifesting doesn’t work if you don’t leave the house. Right?

I make a plan and will commit.

I will say “yes” and I will venture out of my comfort zone.
I will leave the house. Let the Covid love games begin .

Cheers to new beginnings and new love . Please , I beg the universe just don’t leave me hanging at …

I breathe deeply, oh life is now!

Hopefully you found some humour in this and you too believe that

Love is waiting …