When You Are Angry and Alone, Try To Balance Your Mind through Right Understanding.

For instance, think through the following examples:

If a car comes at you from the wrong side of the road, would you get angry and collide with the car and smash it? No. Why? You understand that, ‘I may die.’ Actually, you die even more when you get angry. However, you are not able to see the complete picture here, whereas in the case of car, it can be seen; that is the only difference!

In another example, if a boy throws a stone at you and you start bleeding of it, you would get angry at him, “Why did you throw the stone at me? Look how it’s bleeding”, isn’t it? But suppose a stone came rolling down from a hill, hit you on the head and you started bleeding? You would just look around and walk away without getting angry, because you know that nobody has hit it intentionally, it just happened. Actually, in the earlier situation too, it just happened only.

Through What Understanding Can Anger Be Contained?

The real fact is that no one in this world has the ability to do anything at will. Due to illusion it seems, ‘This person is doing it.’ In reality, whether a stone rolls down from a hill or a person throws a stone at you, the two are actually the same. When you see a stone falling from a hill, you are able to control your anger. So here, too, you need to understand that all this is indeed like a hill. The boy who hit the stone at you is only an instrument appointed by Nature to give you the result of your past karma. The karma was yours, therefore the stone came and hit you, not otherwise. If you understand this, it can balance your mind and the anger can immediately come under control.

Similarly, when someone insults us, we get very angry. Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan, an enlightened being says, “To tolerate an insult is considered a great strength! If someone were to hurl an abuse at me right now, then it would not affect me at all. Even my mind would not spoil for that person. That itself is strength! Whereas people keep on quarrelling, that all is a weakness. To tolerate an insult quietly is the greatest strength. And when you are able to bear such an insult just once, the energy to move a hundred steps further arises.”

We keep getting angry by preserving the wrong ego. Even if there is understanding through the intellect, if one’s intellect were developed, if it were moulded with understanding, then there wouldn’t be any quarrels at all.

At the Root of Anger Is the Ego!

In reality, anger itself is an ego. Anger, greed, pride – at the root, all of them are an ‘ego’ indeed. So when alone, we should examine in what way it is an ego. We should examine, through what type of ego does anger arise in me?

Suppose a master scolds the house helper, “Hey, why did you break the cup and saucer? Are your hands broken? You are like this and you are like that.” Now, when alone, one must examine why did anger arise?

Eg. The master will say, “This woman broke the cup and saucer; that is why I got angry.”

If she broke the cup and saucer, what problem do you have with that?

He will say, “I incurred a loss of this glass.’

In this one instance, one must realize that:

•  He incurs the loss of the glass.

It means you have the ego that worries of profit and loss. Therefore, you should think about that ego and eradicate it. Also, the fact that the cup broke, was that avoidable or unavoidable? Unavoidable! It was destined that at this time, the glass was to be broken by the house helper. When the destined is unavoidable, then should one scold the house helper? Is she at fault then? No!

•    Secondly, he incurs a loss by quarrelling.

By quarrelling, would the cup and saucer become whole once again? No! One just takes satisfaction from quarelling, that’s all. To express egoism, you scold someone. When the cup and saucer break at the hands of the son-in-law, you remain silent there! This is because when someone who is superior comes along, you remain silent, and when someone inferior comes along, then you scorn him! This is all egoism.

• And thirdly, a loss is incurred in the form of vengeance with the house helper!

The conflict that arises in the mind of whose ego is hurt, is yet another thing. The house helper binds vengeance, ‘I am poor, that is why he is saying this to me.’ That vengeance will not spare you in future. Lord has said, “Do not bind vengeance with anyone. If it is possible to bind pure love, then bind pure love, but do not bind vengeance.” This is because if you bind pure love, then pure love will automatically uproot vengeance. Pure love is such that it will uproot even the grave of vengeance. Or else vengeance only increases through vengeance. It constantly keeps on increasing. All this wandering is indeed due to vengeance!

If you think over all of this minutely, then by thinking it over, all of the ego can be washed off.

The Results Can Change Only When the Causes Change!

Pujya Dadashri describes the reality, “Anger is actually a result, just like when you give exam, you get the result. So, to get rid of anger is equivalent of trying to get rid of the result. This result that has come, what is it the result of? That’s what you need to change…. People try to destroy the results. But the solution for anger-pride-deceit-greed is this. Do not do anything about the effect. If you destroy their causes, then all of the effects will depart.”

How Can the Causes be Destroyed?

Pujya Dadashri suggests, “Say I keep getting angry with this man and then I decide that my anger towards him is the result of me having previously seen faults in him. So henceforth, whatever wrong he does, if I do not let it affect my mind, then the anger towards him will gradually cease. If there are some results of the past, that many will come, but later on, everything will cease.”

Does anger arise by seeing faults in others?

Yes. The faults that we see of others, they too are the wrong results. When you see these wrong results, you stop seeing faults of others, then the anger will cease.

Where all does one face opposition?

Break that opposition down. One faces opposition due to short-sightedness. Gnani Purush, the Enlightened One, gives us long sight. On the basis of this long sight, we can see things the way they are! So, come to Gnani and get the right tips that bring about a permanent solution to overcome anger.