For me, the answers came after 40.  I was lost, unsure and awkward up until shortly after 40.  I have never been religious, still I’m not.  I always have seen myself as a good person.  I have empathy for others and care deeply for my family and friends.  I care about social issues, inequality, and our planet.  Up until the age of  40, I drank too much, had difficulty making friends, and was always on the hunt for a way to happiness via wine, weed, etc.  I had read all the popular self-help books like “The Secret”,  anything by Canfield, etc.  At 40 something, I asked the world to help.  I finally admitted that help was needed and that I didn’t have all the answers.  I finally accepted that I was only human.  I gave in.

I had always wondered how people would say they were happy to be in their 40s.  I wondered how anyone could be happy to be older.  Once I reached 40, and after accepting that I was fallible, …my life changed.  I began to accept and appreciate this body with its many flaws.  I began to appreciate my husband, even when he pissed me off.  While I’ll never be religious, I’ve become very spiritual.  I’ve come to realize that happiness IS a choice.  I’ve come to realize that gratitude is the answer to the equation of life.  We are all here to improve and learn our needed lessons.  Humans are very egotistical and this prevents progress.  We need to admit weakness, accept help, and grow.  It happened after 40 for me.