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February 10, 2022

“You want a hot body? You gotta work; bitch”: on my Britney Spears-influenced weight loss philosophy

Photo by Prateek Katyal on Pexels.

*Editor’s Note: Elephant is not your doctor or hospital. Our lawyers would say “this web site is not designed to, and should not be construed to provide medical advice, professional diagnosis, opinion, or treatment to you or any other individual, and is not intended as a substitute for medical or professional care and treatment. Always consult a health professional before trying out new home therapies or changing your diet.” But we can’t afford lawyers, and you knew all that. ~ Ed.

So this one time, I happened to be on this anti-psychotic medication that made me around twenty pounds overweight, and as I was a mini petite type all of my life, this newfound identity as a semi overweight person made my occupation as a hostess and a busser at a fancy pan-Asian restaurant like living hell. My tummy gently poked out of my skin tight blue bussing uniform, and every time I went to the bathroom and looked in the full length mirror, I practically curled my lips up in shame and disgust. I felt like a reject, and I felt like I looked like someone who didn’t know how to take care of themselves physically.

Thankfully, I went off of the medication in time, and my extra stomach fat went away eventually, but that doesn’t change the quasi humiliation I endured, and the total feeling of being endlessly frustrated with myself.

Later after this rough period of my life, I ultimately made the decision that if I ever happen to go through this experience again with a similar medication, I am of the philosophy that losing weight takes serious commitment, and also serious discipline. Just like the musical pop star Britney Spears sings in her famous song, and this really doesn’t put it lightly, but: “You want a hot body? You gotta work, bitch.”

So, I have my own personal weight loss philosophy, of which I call: “The Two Year Commitment,” for those that may have the desire to lose weight, at any stage of their lives.

I had heard in the past that doctors often recommend against crash dieting, instead recommending that those who are interested to be patient and try to lose an average of about two pounds a week, to stay healthy. For the average overweight person, this could possibly sound frustrating and exhausting, a never ending discipline practice with not a lot of gratification, or quick results. Cue the oft heard of crash dieting, weight loss pills, and fast dash cures on every weight loss website.
After giving some consideration to this possibly toxic situation, I gave matters some thought, and realized suddenly that if one truly makes the healthy commitment to lose two pounds a week, for a total of a seemingly long “two years,” the results can be astounding. In reality, for an adult, two years for people simply flys by, and if you want to lose weight and have two years to spend at your leisure, why not make a two year commitment and look like your runway model self in two years? The missing element, I think in these doctors’ recommendations, is not only discipline but patience. Two years from now, with discipline plus Patience, and you know how people always say, “where did the time go?” you could be out at the mall purchasing your dream wardrobe, or on the beach in the Maldives, in one of those monokinis! So, I strongly recommend, for all those who struggle with weight loss as I once did, to have the patience to see long term and make the “Two Year Commitment.” Hopefully this time will fly by for you, and in two years, even if you’re very overweight, you can be at your dream weight. Most people, remarkably, don’t even need to make the whole two year commitment, only more like a six week or six month commitment, but with patience and a long term, mindful view on things, anyone can truly accomplish their weight loss goals within a reasonable amount of time. Like I mentioned before, two years to accomplish a goal really flies by!

On the opposite side of things, if you are not struggling with the discipline of weight loss, but are overweight and contentedly so indeed, the revenge of the overweight woman is in. These days, it’s more to love, more to hold on to, and may all of ya’lls extra rolls and “extra love” turn others on endlessly, if that is what one so needs and desires!

<3 your formerly overweight soul sista,

Jennifer Ashley

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