Like for many women experiencing their first labor, mine was long and hard. As a Prenatal Yoga Teacher and Doula, I assumed that all my training and experience would easily guide me through what turned out to be a forty-two hour labor. During my pregnancy, however, I suffered from an overzealous chiropractic adjustment that later left me with extreme pain in my pelvis, limiting my mobility.

Because of this injury I was physically restricted during labor. I was unable to jump into a deep lunge or settle into a full squat or utilize other moves I had in my back pocket to help move labor along. The cruel irony of not being able to apply the tools I have shared with countless others was frustrating to say the least. I doubted my ability to make it through a drug-free homebirth without my greatest ally; my conditioned body’s ability to move through pain. I had to muster the courage to tap into other powerful aspects of Yoga; mindfulness and breath. For years, I have dropped into my breath to move me through a vigorous Vinyasa or to find stillness in a 30 minute seated meditation, but harnessing my breath during a contraction was an eye opening, spiritual awakening.

Breathing in labor, for me, was truly a full body and all encompassing experience. Each breath became my lifeline. Every piece of me had to focus on drawing my breath in all the way down to my toes and following its journey back out again. With this one pointedness I experienced a being or presence that was more profound than my meditations from the past. As I write this I realize it sounds euphoric and peaceful. It was not. It was hard work and took all my concentration so that I had no choice but to live one breath at a time. With each breath however, came an immense sense of power and strength that carried me through to the final push.

I often tell my Prenatal Yoga students that training for the marathon of labor and delivery is important and necessary. Rolling out your Yoga mat is essential to training for this marathon through movement, mindfulness and breath practices. But what actually happens during the race, what is often out of your control, is truly where the magic and discoveries occur.

While I don’t wish to relive the painful side of labor and delivery, looking back at it I hope I can cultivate that same commitment to moving through challenges with other struggles in life. Perhaps with the same intense focus and practice I can then take my toddler’s tantrums one breath at a time!