Love in Your Pocket

By Louine Shaw – The Clarity Consultant

All my life, whenever anyone has asked me what I’m about; what I’m here for…my answer has always, consistently been, Love.  I’m here – for Love.  You’re here for Love too. To give it.  To receive it.  To deserve it…be worthy of it.  Love.  There is nothing else. It is the centre of and reason for; everything.

I am all for Love.  My life focus is to create Love.  My sole and Soul purpose is Love.  Pure and simple (& yet not so very simple is it?).  Nothing brings me greater joy – than being ‘in Love’; feeling loved; generously giving Love and enjoying the incredible Soul-growing-benefits that come from lessons in Love.

It is true – Love is The Drug.  We’re all addicted.  Own that thought.

Without Love – what inspiration is there for anything?  And what hurts more than anything else? Lack of Love.  Or worse still, no Love at all.  As cliché as it is; heartbreak is a pain unlike any other.  It is as debilitating as physical pain on the Richter scale of pain. It’s like a stop button on your life.  The love tap…has been turned off – really hard..because they damn well meant it. Immediately, you have no desire to participate in life anymore…you become a spectator, watching everyone else (seemingly) enjoy ‘da Lurve’ which has suddenly ceased to exist in your world.  Daily mundane tasks become as tedious as tying shoelaces blindfolded with superglue on your fingertips, whilst jumping hurdles in mud.

Continually giving and giving to a relationship that’s more often sailing stormy seas than calmer ones, is akin to drinking arsenic daily in the hope that the 23.42 hours you’re not drinking it – might be enough to save you.  No amount of faith or hope….or love, will re-set the relationSHIP’s coordinates when the effort is one sided.  Love – is a two person thing.  This is rather enlightening information to some.

You see, some people only keep crumbs of love in their pockets.  Sometimes, a few crumbs will spill out, often when the pocket owner is least aware and the recipient of the crumbs of love becomes so excited, because – hey! – there might be more crumbs of love that inadvertently fall…so out comes that little love-brush-&-shovel!!!

The recipient of the crumbs of love, continues to foolishly sweep up those little crumbs of love.  Grain by grain they believe the accumulation of the crumbs of love they are now squirrelling away in a teeny corner of their precious heart, will amount to something that means something.  Potentially, a Grand Love? No.  This, is crumby love.  No capital letter required. Crumby love means…nothing; zilch. It’s not Love.

Days and weeks pass by…the crumbs are almost enough.  The occasional hug here; a kiss on the forehead there; eye-contact when you’re handing them a cup of tea you’ve made with extra dollops of love; delicious dinner on the table met with a meek smile, an unconscious peck on the cheek when they walk in the door…yes, they’ll wake up to how fabulous you are; you can keep doing this, you might say to yourself.  Seriously though – can you?  Should you?

What are you worth?

You’re investing in a zero percent return market Baby. 

Quit while you still have a shred of self-esteem and accept, that a little pocket of love, is not ever going to be enough for Beautiful generous you & your big, booming heart pumping pure Love.  Love tennis is to be played out with the Heart – two hearts.  No pockets allowed.  None.

That little pocket of love of theirs’ is not a worthy reflection of the amount of love you deserve.  You’re at that love-bowser, face and heart full of anticipation, conscientiously filling up an unfillable tank; because that tank is already full Honeybunch.  It’s full of so much negativity there is no room for anything else, not even a millilitre of love. So their tank runneth over…your love injection is fruitless; falls to the floor – spills everywhere but where you intended and this epic love-journey you embarked upon, stalls. Yep, you’re going nowhere faster than you can say, “really?-bloody-hell-not-again-bugger-this”.  Continuing the ‘relationSHIT’, would be like combining the movies, Groundhog day; Definitely Maybe and Nightmare on Elm Street.  Not a great idea.

The saddest aspect of the person with love in their pocket (only), is that they have absolutely no clue as to how or why, they should love who THEY are.  How can they possibly know how to love you – when they do not know how to access love for themselves?  It’s an unfair, incredibly sad, but foreseeable conclusion from the outset.  It is not your job to educate them on this.

Unfortunately, their story goes like this: they work their way through partner after partner, partaking in fun for 3 months of facile, shallow, façadial interactions; resulting in never taking responsibility for their part in the demise of the relationship, for being emotionally inaccessible to themselves and/or another.  Everyone is far too ‘demanding’ and has ‘high expectations’ and they really dislike ‘confrontation’ (read: cannot & will not self-evaluate).  They actually believe themselves to be a Victim of life and love.  They are not proactive; they are not accountable; they are not objective; they seek not, understanding, insight nor growth.

No, you cannot save them.  No, you will not ever change them. Yes, you deserve to be loved in return…with generosity of spirit – consistently, day after day…not being fearful that heart-felt communication may lead to full-blown “300”-esque war. 

Lovers…real Lovers – talk. They talk.  They listen.  They touch.  They kiss.  Their eyes search each other’s Soul’s for truth and knowing.  They hold space for one another.  They say Sorry.  They are grateful.  They are kind, tender, receptive, appreciative, patient, respectful, caring, honest, trusting thoughtful, considerate, able to compromise and seek understanding for the sake of the grander picture – the Love Relationship.  Rather than focusing on right/wrong or winner/loser.

Love is truly the greatest gift of all when reciprocated generously, fearlessly, vulnerably and sincerely. Detach yourself from expectation and outcome in Love; but counter that, with knowing what and whom, you are worthy and deserving of.

Love in your pocket is wasted Love.  Love fills your Heart.  That’s where it flows from and to and it fills up all the spaces in between. Be a Lover with no pockets – stitch them right up.  Your sweet hands don’t need pockets, but the hands of your Lover.

Seek and nurture Love in the Heart of Yourself and with your Chosen one.  Love is not currency.  Love is a language only willing hearts, fluently speak.

@louinetheclarityconsultant

https://www.louinetheclarityconsultant.com.au