Do you ever feel like there are two people living inside your head, each with their own agenda?
They have different opinions.
And they are ALWAYS in conflict with one another.
“Who the heck is in there anyway? And why are they fighting so much inside my head??!”
If you can relate to this, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you’re not crazy, and it’s TOTALLY normal.
The bad news is, there’s no one that can fix that for you, you’re going to have to do it yourself. But you can.
A divided mind is not a broken mind. It has simply forgotten the truth. It has forgotten it’s true identity, it’s true self.
Enter, the egoic mind. As a construct of separation it’s one and only job is to keep itself alive, by keeping you from remembering the truth. And it has soooo many ways of doing that.
Obsessive thinking, fears, anxiety… all of the patterns that you currently experience that are destructive to your peace and enjoyment of the current moment can be attributed to the egoic self.
Those things are not all “bad” mind you, and I don’t mean that you should label them as such.
Your soul self can use all of those experiences to heal. And it’s the healing of those experiences that increases the consciousness of your soul. You start to awaken. You start to remember who you are and what you’re really capable of. You remember your purpose, your true passions.
You start to feel joy again.
You start to feel alive. Finally.
Life suddenly starts to feel worth living again.
Even though nothing on the outside has changed. You’re still you..only, the REAL you.
So doesn’t it make sense then, that if your soul’s purpose is to allow you to be the full, creative, loving expression of the human being you’re meant to be, and the ego’s purpose is to keep you from that, shouldn’t it be easier to navigate those two voices?
So how do you go about doing that?
Say for example, something from your past comes up in your awareness. Something hurtful, like maybe someone mistreated you or you feel wronged in some way.
How do you know if this is an experience pulled up by your ego to keep you in pain, or, an experience brought forward from your consciousness to be healed?
And you have to choose.
You have to choose whether or not to identify with that victimized self, or whether to realize that that pain, is no longer present. You’ve been carrying it with you in your mind, all this time…but it was a choice.
You were listening to the wrong voice.
The same painful thoughts can have a completely different outcome. What is the determining factor in that? You. Your decision. Your choice.
The past need not control you any more. Or the future. You are keeping your fears alive by identifying with them. Same with anger…regret…or all the other feelings that keep you from enjoying the present moment.
Your soul doesn’t feel these things, that’s why they need healing. That’s why they’re showing up.
Your soul is always gently guiding you towards healing..but it’s so much quieter than the ego so it often gets pushed aside. You often don’t even hear it.
The way to heal the emotional pain and consistent negativity that keeps you from being aligned with self?
It’s to realize that those things are not you. They are in your mind, but they are not you. They can be released when you stop identifying with them.
They are an experience.
All of life is a learning experience. Designed for your soul’s growth, and the remembering of who you are so you can fulfill your purpose of expression.
So the question then becomes… how do I free myself?
When something comes up that feels “negative” you have to practice asking…”What is the purpose of this experience?” Or, “Why is this coming up…what is the TRUTH about this that I need to know?”
I love asking for the truth. I will warn you however, the truth often hurts. And that’s ok.
We have to come to terms with ALL of the aspects of ourselves, “good and bad” if we are going to come back into wholeness. When we are trying to keep different aspects of ourselves separate, or “outside” we will continue to have internal conflict.
This means admitting things about ourselves that often don’t feel very good…such as jealousy…being unkind…hurtful…resentful…you get the idea.
Once we accept and admit those parts of ourselves and ALLOW them to be there, meaning, we don’t judge ourselves harshly for experiencing them, they can heal.
They are just the experiences of our human self. By learning from them through acceptance, we release them.
The key is always to CHOOSE.
“Will I now heal from this, or, will I choose to keep suffering?”
The choice is yours.