Yoga and Social Media                                  by Tatiana Urquiza

What are we communicating through our online persona?

Not long ago I posted on FB a stunning photo of myself in a bikini against a mountain of rock and a cascading waterfall.  I am one centimeter high in the photo.  But it took me a year to put it up because I didn’t want to look like I was boasting (that I was wearing a bikini, that I was in Mexico, that I could climb up that rock, all sorts of things for which I thought someone might hate on me), even though I’m just sitting in a meditative position.  It’s simply a really beautiful photograph.  Not because I’m in it, but because of the setting.

I am attentive to how I portray myself in social media. My favorite posts are things I find funny, sarcastic; involve animals being animals; a photo of a heart my husband raked into our cat box; things I care about (stopping gun violence; protecting the environment; stopping abuse of power; being a good human); silly things that make me laugh out loud and show a twisted sense of humor. They are things I think my friends would appreciate.

Though I am in the yoga business, I am of the age wherein social media is a fun novelty and a great way to connect with friends far away.  Every so often there are teachable moments available in posting, as well, though, with the friends I have, I am basically preaching to the choir.

I don’t have many photos of myself doing amazing poses.  I suppose if I could bend over backward and put my head on my ankles, I might want to share that.  Though my asana practice isn’t of Instagram prize-winning caliber, every so often, I will post a yoga photo, because sometimes those photos are absolutely beautiful and inspiring.

So when an old friend took issue with, and berated me, over what she considered my ‘vain’ photo against the waterfall cascade, then un-friended me, I was shocked and hurt.  It made me question my attitudes about what I was sharing and exposing of myself to this invisible audience.  I wondered if I was one more narcissist feeding the social media monster, and my ego, with images and posts about what I wanted to show was a wonderful life.

I, personally, celebrate my friends looking happy, great, fit, adept at poses, on vacation, with their families, their dinners, pets and political causes (until this recent election cycle, of course).  Most true friends would be happy for me if I posted a photo on the Oscar red carpet with my arms around Meryl or Beyonce; or photos of the workshop I held with 100+ attendees; or in a yoga backbend pose where my nose is two inches from my pubic bone.  (Disclaimer: none of these things have ever happened to me).

I would certainly be happy for my friends, because friends enjoy friends’ happiness, good fortune and success!  After all, my FB friends are people I care for, respect and am interested to know about.  I can honestly say that every one of my FB ‘friends’ is actually a friend; people I have looked in the eye, and our relationships are based on mutual trust, respect and affection.

For those whose business and livelihood depend on their image, social media is also a powerful tool.  It seems obvious that it can also encourage negative behavior, be abused, harmful and sometimes cruel.  So how are we using it?

Are we teaching, or leading others towards healthy and loving connections in this forum?  Are we helping shift perception in a positive way?  How do we balance promoting ourselves, our businesses, and our egos? The beloved ego; can’t live with it, or without it!  Undoubtedly, there is some kind of validation in the ‘likes’ and hearts we receive. Personally, I find those hearts a sweet human connection to my friends near and far.

Whichever way we see it, it is important to me to act in a yogic way, an authentic way, in portraying myself on social media.  What others think of me should not be an issue if I am being the person I want to be.

It is imperative that we do not hide behind a visual façade and psychological persona we have created to resemble a perfectly happy life that exists only in our imagination and on the internet.  It is essential to not believe ‘our own press’ so that we do not base our self-worth and self-esteem on the number of clicks we see on our feed, nor define and judge ourselves by the opinion of another.

If we put ourselves out there, it is important to be authentic, and align our most idealized, as well as our true self, with our own voice, values and beliefs.

I believe it’s essential that all of us unite the idea of who we desire to be, with the person we actually are, into how we live, in our speech, actions, thoughts and relationships.  To be real, authentic and true, to live in the truth of our values, demands of us the highest awareness and responsibility in how we comport ourselves, for our own integrity, and how we place ourselves in the world.

Who am I, is the question I try to ask myself daily, and who do I want to be in the short time I have here on earth?  Sometimes doing is more important than showing.  But sometimes those beautiful inspiring photos should be shared.   Perhaps we can do both.

ॐ

Tatiana Urquiza

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818 922 4854