So much time wasted; time that I’ll never get back, and I don’t want back either! I’m where I am for a reason & wouldn’t have learned or evolved into the woman I am today without all of it! A woman strong in what she wants, has many passions, and is willing to do any-fucking-thing it takes to take on the fears, limits, and anxieties that has taken over my very spirit. I lost so much of my life being scared of what others think and say about who I am (more-like who they THINK I am), which led to a mess of poor life decisions.. drinking my own poison.
I’m not saying I’m not going to make mistakes, or need the support of those I love along the way. It means that I’m moving more purposefully. Going with the flow, but steering the direction of that flow. Still having anxieties, depression episodes, and panic attacks (had one with starting a new job today).. yet, utilizing the “tools” and help I’ve received along the way. I’ve already lived half of my life too afraid to ever use them, and just gave away the tools to others to carve my character for me. I’m done with all that.. DONE!!! I’m tired of living as a “survivor” of abuse. I DON’T FUCKING WANT TO LIVE MY LIFE IN SURVIVAL MODE! I must & I will THRIVE… beyond even my own expectations; beyond any dream I have today or tomorrow, because I KNOW in my heart of hearts that the Universe will provide more than I’ve ever dreamed of or could possibly put a wish upon. I just know it.. I feel it.. I am it. Everything I need is already with me. And it is with you too, if you believe and work hard enough, you’ll get there. If I can, anyone can.. and I don’t state that lightly…